


Don't Shoot Me I'm Only The Piano Player

by therumandcokediaries



Series: Frostiron and Spiderson [18]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Adoption, Corporal Punishment, DNA Tests, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Family Drama, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, IronDad and SpiderSon, Irondad, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Paparazzi, Parent Loki (Marvel), Parent Tony Stark, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Peer Pressure, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Pressure, Relationship Problems, Sex Education, Sex Talk, Social Issues, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, celebrity issues, family stuff, mentions of corporal punishment, potentially some minor medical inaccuracies, sex education talk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-30
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-02-27 15:48:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 76,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22039570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/therumandcokediaries/pseuds/therumandcokediaries
Summary: Previously titled Ideal ConfusionStory summary: Giving into the constant pressure from the press, Tony decides to put a rest to the rumours that Peter is his biological son - once and for all.
Relationships: Loki & Peter Parker, Loki/Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Series: Frostiron and Spiderson [18]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1192111
Comments: 30
Kudos: 136





	1. Disturbing The Peace I’ve Found

-

Tony picked up the phone.

“Hello, Tony Stark speaking”

“Mr Stark! I’m a representative of Hardcastle DNA Testing, and we’d like to offer you a free-”

Tony slammed the phone down. Almost as soon as he did, his mobile started ringing. Tony answered it. It was his press manager, Marco.

“Hi”

“Hi Tony. Listen, I’ve had people on the phone all morning because of that story last week. You know forty-five different DNA companies have offered you free or discounted tests now. Forty-five! I’m surprised there’s that many around”

“There’s probably hundreds” Tony grumbled. “I’m not interested”

“Yeah, I know; that’s what I’ve been telling them all. I still thought you should know about it”

“Just hang up on the next one. Or tell them to piss off”

Marco laughed. “Duly noted”

“Are you any closer to figuring out who’s responsible for the story?”

“Nope. I think it’s just something some apprentice in the news room came up with, trying to break into the industry. You know, dragging up an old rumour and bigging it up. I’ll keep you posted”

“Thanks”

“Hey, dad?” Peter said, coming into the kitchen. “Can I-”

“Hold on, kiddo. Can’t you see I’m on the phone?” Tony sighed. “Listen, Marco, I’ve gotta go: family stuff”

“Sure. Talk to you later, Tony”

“Talk to you later”

Tony hung up and put his phone down.

“Alright kiddo, what’s up?”

“Can I go out with Flo and Millie tonight? Macy’s in trouble so she can’t go out but there’s this fair on tonight that the rest of us wanna go to. It opens at like, five, so I’m not gonna be back super later or anything. So, can I go?”

Tony sighed. “I don’t think it’s a good idea, sweetheart”

“Well, why not?”

“Because the press are all over us at the moment, you especially”

“Yeah, but they’re not gonna try anything at the fair, are they?”

“They might” Tony said. “Remember what I said? There’s no such thing as an off-duty journalist. If one sees you, chances are they’ll chase you for comments or confirmation or whatever. It’s a current story, cos of that article that came out last week”

“That article’s pure slander though!” Peter said. “Come on dad; let me go! It’s not like I’m gonna say anything to any reporters. Little Miss Selective-Mutism, remember?”

“Since when have you been Little Miss?” Tony shook his head and sighed. “I’m not sure, kiddo. I don’t want you getting hounded”

“…Please?”

Tony looked at him sorrowfully. He reached out, touching the boys face gently.

“Don’t look at me like that, sweetheart”

Peter looked up at him, trying to look as little and sad as possible. He could see Tony dithering. 

“Stop with the puppy dog eyes!” 

Tony tried not to crack.

“Tony?” Loki appeared in the doorway. “Is everything ok?”

Tony looked at him. “Yeah. Yeah. Peter wants to go out tonight, but I don’t think it’s a good idea. He’ll just get hounded by the press if they see him”

“That’s sensible” Loki said.

“But dad! Dads! I can look after myself. I won’t talk to anyone other than my friends and customer service staff, ok? And I won’t mention to article at all, I promise. Come on, please let me go!”

“No, your father’s right” Loki said. “It’s not a good idea for you to go out unaccompanied, not when we’re in the public eye this much”

“Well, why don’t one of you come with us then, if being _unaccompanied_ is the big problem?”

“I’m too busy, sweetheart” Tony said. “I’ve got too much to do tonight”

Peter looked at Loki.

“I’m seeing Pepper tonight” Loki said. “It’s been on the calendar for too long for me to cancel now. We’ve already had to rearrange it twice”

Peter sighed heavily. “How about we make a deal? If I-”

“Peter, no” Tony said. “The answer’s no, and that’s that. I’m sorry, chick”

“What if I can find a chaperone?”

“Peter, stop it” Tony said. “I’m sorry, but you’re not going out. Not until everything calms down in the news”

Peter knew when it was a waste of breath arguing a point. He sighed heavily, and swallowed hard.

“Fine. I’m gonna go and text Flo”

“…I hate having to say no to him” Tony said once Peter was out of earshot. “He was gonna cry just then, did you notice?”

“It’s for the best” Loki said, quickly turning to switch the kettle on. “It’s safer this way”

“Mm…” Tony sighed heavily. “Poor little Peter. I’ve never known anything other than being famous, but since I’ve been a dad, I’ve really hated this part of it. Why can’t they just leave my family alone?”

“Easy: it makes for a good story” Loki said. “That’s all they care about. Even if every word of an article is fake, people will still read it if it’s got someone high-profile in it”

“Marco rang a minute ago” Tony said. “Said we’ve had forty-five different companies offering DNA tests for free or for cheap”

“They need to wind their necks in. How do they find the numbers?”

“I guess people have enough inside sources to find what they’re looking for” Tony checked his watch. “I’m behind schedule again because of this bloody thing. It’s incredible how much impact that bloody article has had”

“It was essentially just photos, wasn’t it?”

Tony nodded. “Yeah, mainly. Photos comparing me and the kid, and a few comments about the adoption being a front”

“Just ignore it”

“I’m trying to, but it’s getting harder: we have this sort of ‘scandal’ far too often. Basically every interview I go to now, I get asked if he’s my biological child. It’s getting tiring”

“Why not just do the test to shut them up? There’s nothing to lose, especially since so many places are offering them for free” Loki suggested.

“What, and give them the satisfaction? No way!” Tony scoffed. “Besides, they’d probably fiddle the results just to get a big newspaper scandal going”

Loki shook his head slightly, pouring boiling water into his mug. “Well, we’ll just have to continue to ignore it then. Soon enough some other celebrity will do something outrageous like go out wearing make up or fall over on stage, and everyone will forget about it”

“I hope so. I’d pay the Kardashians to leak another sex tape just to get the press off my back at this point. I don’t want to have to keep letting the kid down. He’s fed up enough as it is without this kind of thing going on”

“He’ll be ok. He’s a resilient little thing; he’ll bounce back soon enough”

“Mm, I hope so” Tony sighed. “What time are you meeting Pepper?”

“Seven” Loki said. “So I’ve got plenty of time to catch up on that mountain of washing down in the laundry room”

“Yeah… Well, I’d better get on with all these emails. It’s got really out of hand recently”

“I’m not surprised. Well” Loki went and got the milk out of the fridge. “Good luck with it. I’d better be getting on too”

Tony nodded slightly. He opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by his phone going off. It was Marco again. He sighed heavily. It was going to be a long afternoon.

-

Peter wasn’t in a great mood that evening. Flo and Millie were going to the fair without him, which he supposed was fine, but it still made him feel a bit upset and left out. He was annoyed with Loki for going out, and annoyed with Tony for being busy, and at both of them for saying no. He knew he was being unreasonable, but he couldn’t help what he felt. His parents had totally freaked at the latest article. Peter didn’t really get it, because it wasn’t too unlike what they’d seen before. But something about it had really shaken them. It wasn’t just them either:- Peter’s aunts and uncles seemed to be in a bit of a spin about it too, and the phone had barely stopped ringing since it was published. Plus, the news was discussing it a lot now too, both on the television and the radio, and it was all over social media too. Peter wasn’t entirely sure _why_ this particular article had blown up in the way it had, but it was a little confusing.

But even so, he didn’t see why he had to essentially be grounded because of it. He’d long since learnt not to talk to reporters, and due to his selective mutism, he physically couldn’t a lot of the time anyway. Which begged the question; why didn’t his parents trust him? Or, why were they so worried? Maybe they were just stressed. Or maybe they were just being overprotective. Tony had been a bit funny with him over the festive season, but they were back to being close now, mostly. Peter knew they were still upset about Loki’s infertility and the subsequent loss of any IVF baby. Maybe that’s why they were being overprotective and trying to protect him from something that wasn’t _really_ a threat, because he was probably the only ‘baby’ they’d ever have. He didn’t know. He wasn’t sure he _wanted_ to know. He didn’t suppose it made a difference anyway.

-

Peter gave Tony a shake, and Tony jumped awake.

“Sorry” Peter said, taking a step back.

“It’s ok, it’s ok” Tony mumbled, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. “I fell asleep”

“Yeah…”

“I haven’t been sleeping too well lately” Tony said. 

He tapped his laptop, waking it up and unlocking it. He looked at the list of emails still to be read, and sighed. He closed the laptop and moved it onto the side table.

“What’s up, kiddo?”

“Um, I was just wondering what we were gonna do for tea?”

Tony checked his watch. “Oh god, is it that time already? You should’ve woken me up earlier, kiddo”

“I’ve been distracted”

“Oh right. Homework?”

“No, just… Other stuff”

Tony gave him a look. “Nothing dodgy, right?”

Peter gave him a look. Tony laughed slightly and shook his head.

“Alright kiddo. Come here”

Peter stepped closer, and Tony pulled him down onto the sofa, giving him a hug.

“So, what do you fancy for tea?”

“Uh-”

Tony’s phone starting ringing, interrupting them. Tony sighed and answered it.

“Hi, Marco” he monotoned.

“You need to turn on your TV” Marco said firmly. 

“What?” Tony almost squeaked. “Why?”

“Just do it, now. Channel six”

Marco hung up. Tony looked at Peter, and Peter looked at him. Tony reached for the remote and turned the telly on. The news was on, and Tony’s heart started thumping when he saw the photo of himself and Peter behind the presenters.

“Dad-?”

“Sh, Peter”

Tony stared at the TV, listening hard.

“…It would hardly be a surprise” one presenter said. “Tony Stark’s reputation precedes him. For years he was known as a Playboy first and everything else second. Even now he’s married, he’s still known as the ex-womaniser, a man who’s probably been to bed with most every woman in the city, if not the state-”

“Dad, why are we watch-?”

“Sshhh!” Tony hissed, clapping a hand down over Peter’s mouth.

Peter twitched a bit, annoyed, but he couldn’t really pull away as his head was resting on Tony’s shoulder, not really leaving any room for movement. He scowled and looked back at the telly. He didn’t usually watch anything to do with the family on the news, but he supposed he didn’t really have a choice now.

“… People can call it a rumour as much as they want” the other presenter was saying. “But we all know there’s no smoke without fire”

“I’ve heard people argue that there are times people look like complete strangers” the first presenter said. “But I’m more inclined to listen to all those who have seen the similarities between Tony Stark and his ‘adopted’ son and thought them a little too similar for it to just be coincidence”

Presenter two laughed slightly. “Ha! _Coincidence_! Don’t they say the world is rarely so lazy? There’s a little too much ‘coincidence’ here for my liking. We know the story, don’t we? Stark’s son, he started out as an apprentice at Stark Industries, right? Sure, it’s said that he’s a clever kid, but how did he get picked? There’s no records of public applications, and if Stark was choosing from Midtown, the school Peter was attending at the time, why was he the one to get chosen? He lived in Queens, didn’t he? Nothing special by all accounts. He wouldn’t have been the only eligible candidate at the school, would he?”

“There’s never only one candidate” Presenter one said. “Surely there was a shortlist? But, like the applications, there’s no record of it - no physical record, anyway. Which of course leads us to the conclusion that Tony Stark was searching for an apprentice for S.I independently. Why? Well, I don’t suppose that’s important”

“Unless it was for _himself_ , and not for the company. Personal gain as opposed to professional gain. Maybe the apprenticeship was a front”

“I see where you’re coming from! So perhaps Stark _knew_ who the boy was. Maybe he’d always known the kid was his, and this was a way to get into his life”

Tony held tighter to Peter, so Peter could feel his pulse under Tony’s hand. He whined and struggled, and Tony moved his hand off his mouth and instead rested it on the side of Peter’s face. He rested his chin on his head too, holding him tight, eyes glued to the telly. Peter stayed quiet, watching too, wondering why Tony seemed so worried. Peter didn’t like hearing strangers talk about his life, but he accepted there was nothing he could do about it.

“It’s like a book storyline” Presenter two continued. “Wanting to connect with a long-lost child without uprooting everything the child had grown up to know”

“Of course, the boys parents were dead, weren’t they?” Presenter one said. “He’d been living with his aunt for most of his life. Which begs the question; did the boy know too?”

“Perhaps, and perhaps not. Of course when the aunt died, what was there to stop Stark taking his son? Yes, there’s the family friend story, which lead to the adoption story, but we know there’s been many articles saying it’s a front to try to keep the truth under wraps”

“That’s very true. Of course there’s the subject of names. The boy is Parker-Stark, not plain Stark. Is it an attempt to cover up-” Presenter one paused, a hand to his ear. “I’m sorry, I’ve just been told we’re going to have to stop there; we’re running out of time”

“Of course”

“So” Presenter one looked at the camera. “Is Peter ‘Parker’-Stark the biological child of Tony Stark? Tony Stark himself is yet to comment. Please Tweet or email us if you have anything to say on the matter. Coming up next, your local weather with Ian Macclesfield”

Tony turned off the television. There was a heavy silence. Peter dared wriggle, and Tony clamped an arm over the boys chest and picked up his phone.

“Marco, how the hell could you let this happen?!” he shouted as soon as the man answered. “I thought you were putting a stop to this!”

“I’m doing my best, but it’s not easy to overtake an entire media empire. Every single paper and station in New York is reporting slightly different versions of the same story, not to mention several national stations. I can’t control everyone, Tony” Marco shot back. “You need to think of what you want to stay in a statement. There’s no way anyone is going to let this go without a solid answer: it’s been going on for years now, and it’s a slow news month. Get that; slow news _month_. So you either need to suck it up or release a statement, because there’s only so much I can do for you”

Tony was quiet for a moment. He let go of Peter and stood up.

“I want my son out of the headlines. I don’t like having my family hassled like this! Why do people care so much anyway?!”

“People care about what the media tells people to care about. It’s a conspiracy; a family scandal; a secret - that’s what people like! It’s like with Elton John: no one really cared when he came out publicly, but when he started going bald, the press wouldn’t leave him alone. It’s low-rent, but that’s what people like. We both know the general public are as thick as two short planks”

“Well what can I do about it?! I’m not Elton John! And anyway, people don’t go on about his hair now! …Do they?” he looked at Peter.

“No, they left him alone after he started wearing wigs and he told them so. Because then it wasn’t seen as a scandal or a cover up any more” Peter said. 

Tony turned away from him. “Did you hear that?”

“Yes, I heard it” Marco said. “And he’s right”

“What’s so scandalous about this? It _isn’t_ a scandal, and I’m not covering anything up!”

“Well, then you’ve got nothing to worry about, have you?” Marco paused, and sighed heavily. “Tony, I get it: it’s stressful and annoying. But so what? You’re used to this. Look, it’s late. I’m gonna call it a night on this matter, and you should too. Spend time with your kid or do your emails or something. I’ll call tomorrow and we’ll sort out the press release. Ok?”

Tony sighed in annoyance. 

“Alright, fine” he huffed. “Goodnight”

“Night, Tony. Talk tomorrow. Bye now”

“Bye”

Tony ended the call. He went to throw his phone onto the sofa, but he wasn’t watching what he was doing, and he completely misjudged it, so instead of landing on the seat, it hit Peter hard on the forehead.

“Ow!”

“Oh fuck! Sorry, chick, I’m sorry!” Tony grabbed hold of him, checking his head. “Ouch! I didn’t think I’d thrown it that hard. Maybe we should get you an ice pack: your father’ll kill me if he sees you all bumped and bruised”

“At least you didn’t do it on purpose”

Tony kissed him hard on the forehead.

“OW! Dad!”

“Sorry! Oh god, I-… Ok, come on; let’s go and get you an ice pack”

-

Peter sat at the breakfast bar, holding an ice pack against the bump on his head, and watching Tony pacing the kitchen.

“Dad, you’re kinda making me nervous”

“Well, I _am_ nervous” Tony said, continuing to pace. “This is getting blown totally out of proportion. I know how this goes. They’ll start turning up everywhere I go, following Loki around, following you around, all that kind of scummy paparazzi stuff. I’ll have to keep you off school, and-”

“Don’t you think you’re overreacting a bit?”

“No, I don’t! I don’t want you and Loki hounded for a stupid news story. It’s not fair on either of you - or me. They need to leave you alone”

“Well, why don’t we do a DNA test, then? Once they’ve got the proof that I literally am just an adopted son, not a biological son, then they’ll shut up, right?”

“And give them the satisfaction? Absolutely not!” Tony said. “I told your father earlier: I won’t be bullied into it. Besides, all these companies will probably fiddle the results to get whatever outcome _they_ want - because they want a good story and a good way to get more business. I’m not having “As Used By Tony Stark” splattered all over some dodgy DNA testing website and all over the news along with fake results”

“Dad, can you stop? You’re really putting me on edge”

Tony stopped. He sighed and sat down opposite Peter at the breakfast bar. 

“Sorry, kiddo. All this is just really getting to me. It’s pretty tough to deal with to be honest”

“Mm…”

They were quiet for a moment, until Peter’s stomach rumbling loudly broke the silence.

“Sounds like your whale is singing again” Tony said. “What do you want to eat?”

Peter shrugged. “Whatever’s easiest, I guess”

Tony paused. He pulled his phone out of his pocket.

“Oh”

“What?”

“Loki…” Tony opened the text. “He saw the news thing. And he says there’s probably gonna be another little headline cos a reporter recognised him and tried to question him and he told them to fu- to go away. But not in a nice way”

“Mm”

Tony sighed again. “Anyway, do you wanna order a takeaway?”

“It’s up to you”

“I’m not that hungry” Tony said. “You decide”

“I’m not that hungry either”

“Liar. I heard your stomach just now” 

“Well…”

Tony sighed and put his phone away. “Give us a clue, chick”

“I don’t know. Anything, I guess”

Tony stood up. “…Cheese on toast?”

Peter nodded, and Tony nodded back. That was simple enough. He didn’t have the energy to do anything complicated. He needed to think.

-

Loki was surprised at how quiet the house was when he got home later that night. He found Tony in the living room, biting his thumb and staring at a blank Google search page on his laptop.

“Tony?”

Tony nodded slightly, not taking his eyes off the screen. 

“Are you ok?”

“Mm”

Loki sat down beside him and closed his laptop.

“Where’s Peter?”

“Bed”

“I see” Loki sighed. “I’m sorry about my text. It just slipped out. He might ignore it; lots of reporters get told to fuck off - and worse. But I still thought you should know”

“Mm… You saw the news thing”

“Yes. It was on where we were” Loki said. “It’s all nonsense and clutching at straws, you know that”

“I know” Tony said, moving his laptop aside and finally looking at Loki. “It’s still getting to me though”

“I know” Loki sighed. “What’s different this time? Is it because of what happened last year?”

“Maybe. What do you think?”

“I think it might be. I’m not sure. Unless it’s a premonition of something to come”

“What kind of something?”

“I don’t know” Loki said. “Maybe something’s going to happen”

“Mm…”

“Something definitely feels different this time” Loki said. “We’ve had similar articles before”

“I know, but not like this. It’s so widespread. So insistent. It sounded so much more like gossip before”

“It’s still gossip now. People are inventing facts to suit their shows and articles. Have you sorted a press release yet?”

“No. Marco’s gonna ring again tomorrow and sort it with me”

“What has Peter had to say about all this?”

“Not much” Tony said. “He said what you said; that we should do a test just to shut them up. And I said to him what I said to you”

“I see. Is he bothered by it all?”

“No more than usual. I think he still finds it a bit weird hearing facts about his life coming from people he’s never met. I mean, the fact he was orphaned and lived with May before coming here are common knowledge, even if the deeper facts aren’t”

“Yes, that’s true” Loki said. “Still…”

“He’s just a baby, little Peter. He shouldn’t have to worry about any of this kind of stuff”

“I don’t think he’s worrying, for what it’s worth” Loki said. “I think he’s more worried about you and your reaction - and me and mine - than he is about the thing itself”

“Maybe…”

“So, what are you going to do?”

“Tell people to stop their stupid fantasy tales and mind their own business” Tony said. “Maybe consider home-schooling again”

“You can’t take him out of school just because reporters are interested in the family” Loki said. “They’re hardly going to march into an elite secondary school to question him. They wouldn’t have the audacity - and besides, his selective mutism is as common knowledge as his last name nowadays. They’d be wasting their time even if they had the gall to do it”

“They’d better stay away from my kid” Tony put his arms around Loki and rested his head on his chest. “I really hope this blows over soon. It’s really playing with my anxiety. Plus I hate that I had to keep Peter in tonight. He’s more upset about that than he’s letting on”

“I can imagine…”

Tony lifted his head, looking at him. “What?”

“Is he still friends with Macy? He doesn’t really talk about her much”

“Well, apparently she’s grounded. That’s what he said today. I think she’s been grounded a lot lately. I can’t say I’m surprised. She’s a right little madam. I can imagine her being a nasty piece of work when she’s a bit older” Tony said. “Maybe that’s why they haven’t been seeing each other much lately. I can’t imagine Flo’s ever been in trouble in her life, and Millie’s a good girl, so they’re hardly likely to get grounded and miss out like Macy”

“So you think they’re still friends; they just don’t see each other outside school much because she’s bad?”

“Yeah, that’s my guess” Tony rested his head back against Loki’s chest. “Has anyone at the hospital asked you about this news thing?”

“Not really. A few patients have mentioned it, but of course I won’t discuss it with people. Jo Jo mentioned it too, but he mentions everything about us that ends up in the papers. He thinks this story is a load of rubbish too”

“Good. At least some people have got their heads screwed on… You’re right though; something _does_ feel different this time” he sat up. “Maybe we’re just being paranoid. Are you going to bed?”

Loki paused for a moment. “…Yes, I think so. Are you?”

“Later. I’m gonna try to get through some more emails first. Night”

“Alright. I’m going to check in on the baby first”

“Good idea. He seemed a bit funny last time I checked on him, but he said he was just tired. Maybe he’ll be a bit more open with you”

“Maybe” Loki gave him a hug and a kiss. “See you in a bit”

“Night darling. See you in a bit”

-

Peter was awake when Loki checked in on him.

“Hello, you”

“Hi, daddy”

“What are you still doing up? I got the impression you went to bed ages ago”

“I did” Peter said. “I’ve slept a little bit, but not much, and now I can’t get back to sleep”

“What’s the matter?” Loki asked, sitting down on the edge of the bed. “Are you just not tired, or is something bothering you?”

“Well…”

“You can tell me” Loki said gently. 

“I just… This latest news thing is really bothering dad, isn’t it? It’s hardly a new rumour, so I don’t get why it’s bothering him so much this time”

“Well, it’s much more persistent and in depth than it has been in the past. It sounds so sure of itself, and it’s being presented as fact” Loki said. “It’s very different to the old ones, and it’s lasting longer as a top story too. Your dad doesn’t like it when the press get you involved at the best of times”

“He never has” Peter said. “Even back at the start when we were just getting to know each other. Although I think that might have been more about protecting the fact that I’m Spiderman. More than anything else, anyway”

“You might be right there, although he’s definitely cared about you for you and not for Spiderman since not that long after he found you. But since you became close to him, and especially since you came to live with us, it’s been much more about protecting his family. Do you understand?”

“I think so. He wants me to have as normal a life as possible, even though I’m Tony Stark’s son, so that includes keeping out of the press as much as possible”

Loki blinked at him. “Where did you hear that?”

“I overhead him talking to uncle Steve about it ages ago”

“I see” Loki said. “Well, it’s true. I think he wants to protect your feelings too”

“I wish he wouldn’t worry. I don’t like seeing him like this. He got really funny when we were watching that thing”

“Yes, he mentioned you were with him. I didn’t think you would have been”

“No?”

“No, so I was a little surprised when he told me. Are you ok about that?”

Peter shrugged. “He held me pretty tight, and that kinda hurt a bit. And I didn’t like seeing him getting all anxious and stuff. I think it would’ve been better if I hadn’t’ve been there”

Loki nodded. “And the news segment?”

“I still find it weird that people know who I am”

Loki stroked Peter’s hair gently. “Maybe you’d be better off just trying to ignore it all”

“Maybe. It’ll all blow over before too long anyway, won’t it?”

“I should think so” Loki said. “Now, do you need anything before I go to bed?”

Peter shook his head slightly. “No, I don’t think so”

“Alright darling” Loki gave him a quick kiss. “Goodnight sweetie”

“Night daddy. See you in the morning”

Loki tucked him in and left him, closing the door behind him. Peter waited until he was sure he was gone, and then reached under his pillow for his phone. He opened the website he’d been looking at. 

As much as Peter knew what a DNA test was, it wasn’t something he’d really looked into before, but recent events had made him curious. Besides, the way Peter saw it, the easiest way to get the press off his families case was to do a DNA test - whether Tony agreed or not. It wasn’t like Peter couldn’t afford it himself, and he could be sneaky when he needed to be.

The information on the websites he’d found were informative without being overbearing or full of medical jargon. Basically, what he gathered was that you’d get results of 0% (excluded) or 99.99% (Paternity Practically Proven). It was simple: excluded meant they weren’t the father, and Paternity Practically Proven meant they were. Ignoring the sciencey bits, Peter concluded the ‘Practically Proven’ bit and the 99.99% were a back-covering measure. Still, simple enough. He didn’t read into that bit too much though, because he knew it would never be relevant to him.

He read the information for the home DNA test kit instead. The website he was on said you would get the results in 3-5 working days. Although it said it was recommended if available, you didn’t need to include a DNA sample from the mother, which was a great relief, as was the fact that the service was completely confidential. The website also stated results would be sent by email unless otherwise requested. This was good, because it meant intercepting the post wasn’t going to be an issue. Well, he’d have to intercept it for the actual post, but he could order it so that it would arrive on a Saturday, which would mean he’d definitely be about to get to the post before his parents. It said it was discreet packaging, but still.

The website was pretty reassuring, talking about its credibility and experience and accuracy and legality and everything else Peter needed to know about to put his mind as rest. It all seemed pretty simple. Collecting the samples was just oral swabs for cheek cells. Tony was a pretty heavy sleeper nowadays, so Peter was fairly confident that he’d be able to get Tony’s sample easily enough without him knowing. 

Peter was starting to feel pretty confident about his idea, until he clicked onto the page about how to take samples, just to fact check. It listed everything that would be included in the kit, and he stopped short when he was a few lines down.

‘ - _Consent form; this form will authorise laboratory testing. Without it properly filled out, we will not be able to analyse your samples_ ’

Peter stopped for a minute. That would mean Tony would have to sign it as well. He hadn’t realised. From what he’d read on other websites (and checked on Wikipedia) it was only the UK where the Human Tissue Act meant you couldn’t DNA test someone without their written consent. He was certain he could just forge Tony’s signature, the way he did with some letters from school.

Peter shook his head and carried on reading, but it was hard to focus on the instructions. When he reached the bottom of the page, he felt uncomfortable, and guilty: guilty that he’d so easily considered not only doing a DNA test behind his parents back, but also potentially breaking the law and destroying the trust they had in him by forging a signature on said DNA test. 

Peter closed the browser and shoved his phone under his pillow. He lay down and pulled the covers up over his shoulders, and hugged his toy seal close. No, he couldn’t do a DNA test behind his dad’s back. It was a silly idea anyway. Even if it was possible, Tony would never forgive him if he found out he’d deceived him. Peter sighed. Well, it wasn’t really his business anyway, and he knew that Tony wasn’t his biological father, but he was his father all the same. He’d adopted him, hadn’t he? So that made him family. He didn’t need any test to know that. Like Tony said; why give the paparazzi the satisfaction?

Peter snuggled down in bed. This would all blow over soon anyway.

*


	2. He'll Get You In Trouble

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As with all my fics, comments and questions are welcome! (and encouraged)
> 
> (aka please offer me some sweet Validation™) (only slightly kidding)

-

Peter was glad it was Monday, because school was a good way to get his mind off what was going on at home. Or at least it would be, if it weren’t for Nigel.

Other people were talking about the big news story too, of course, but most of them had the sense to lower their voices or stop talking when they saw Peter. Brash as always, Nigel decided to take centre stage and keep the tabloids big talking point as the classes big talking point.

Peter tried to ignore him at first, aided by Millie and Flo, but it wasn’t easy. It soon proved impossible, however, because Nigel got fed up being ignored and got louder, and closer.

“Stop getting all up in our faces!” Millie hissed, giving him a little push.

“Keep your hands to yourself, Millicent” Nigel scowled. “I’m not talking to _you_ : I’m talking to Peter”

“Peter doesn’t want to talk to you” Flo said, putting an arm round Peter’s waist.

Peter, of course, didn’t say anything. He stayed where he was, leaning back against the desk, arms over his chest, looking distastefully at his classmate.

“So why didn’t he take you in when you were a little kid?” Nigel asked. “Was it because he was still busy shagging around?”

Peter barely reacted, but his throat felt tight. There was so much he wanted to say but couldn’t, and Nigel knew it. And they both knew Peter wasn’t about to reach for his whiteboard and scribble out an argument.

“I think everyone’s surprised it lasted as long as it did, but they say the truth will out, right?”

“Of _course_ it’s the truth” Wendy said, boldly leaving her corner to back up her cousin. 

Peter shot her a look. They’d never gotten along, not since Peter’s fountain pen had broken and splattered her book with ink on his first day at St Hendricks. She didn’t really get on with anyone else either, and usually kept to herself to such an extent that Peter often forget she was there.

So suddenly standing up and being in front of him, with her wartime housewife hairstyle and round spectacles and look of utter distaste - almost contempt - in her eyes, was very bold indeed - and very unwelcome.

“There’s no smoke without fire, you know” she said. “Channel six are a credible source - and it’s not as though it’s a far fetched story. I’m sure we all heard what they had to say last night”

Peter narrowed his eyes at her. She was standing a little too close for his liking.

“I don’t understand the big secrecy” Wendy continued. “Lots of celebrities have children born outside their current relationship. It’s plain to see the resemblance between you and your father. Why keep up the insistence that you’re not blood related? If you ask me-”

“No one _is_ asking you” Flo snapped. “People can look alike without being related by blood, you know. If it were true, it would be common knowledge, and not a news scandal. People are just bored and trying to come up with something to get the masses - people like you - thick people, interested”

Wendy’s face darkened, and Peter raised a hand to give her a little push - but Nigel grabbed hold of his wrist.

“Don’t you dare touch my cousin!” he hissed.

Peter paused for a split second. He looked at Nigel, and his captive hand, and then his free hand - and then he punched him hard. Nigel let go of Peter, stumbling, tripping over someones bag and falling over. Peter stood where he was, giving Wendy an “I dare you” look. Wendy wisely stepped backwards, unsure how to react. 

“Right” Nigel growled, getting to his knees. “That’s it!”

He reached out and tripped Peter. Peter fell, but caught himself neatly on his finger tips. He snapped his head up, and Nigel went for him. Peter dodged, and grabbed Nigel’s fist. He wasn’t in the mood for this. 

“Even if Tony Stark didn’t birth you, I bet Loki had something to do with it” Nigel hissed.

Peter shoved him hard in the chest so that he fell backwards. Before Nigel had even a second to regain his composure, Peter pounced and sat on him, grabbing his wrists and pinning them by his head. It wasn’t a difficult thing to do, and in the back of his mind, Peter thanked his Spiderman abilities for being more than just a suit. 

“Why are you so strong?!” Nigel cursed, struggling helplessly. 

Peter, as always, kept his mouth closed. He bit the inside of his mouth, because he suddenly saw the funny side of being on the floor of his form room, straddling Nigel and holding him helpless to the carpet. He knew it would be fatal to laugh. He just had to wait until Nigel gave up.

“Boys!” Ms Hathersage cried, rushing into the form room. “What on Earth are you two doing?! Get up at once!”

She assisted them in doing so by way of grabbing each boy by the collar and hauling them to their feet. She gave them both a little shake, and glared at the rest of the form, who wisely slunk to their seats and sat down.

“It’s barely nine o’ clock and you’re already causing havoc! Is this really any way for two young gentlemen to behave?” Ms Hathersage chided. “What were you fighting about? Come on; out with it!”

“We weren’t” Nigel said. “We were just messing about”

“Is that so? What happened to your face?”

Nigel raised a hand to his cheek, which still hurt rather a lot. 

“Looks bad, does it?” he shook his head slightly. “Landed on Bernie’s PE bag. There’s football boots in there, you know”

Ms Hathersage looked at Bernie, who seemed to be trying his level best to turn invisible. Ms Hathersage looked at Nigel hard, and then looked at Peter.

“Is that right?”

Peter nodded slightly. Ms Hathersage seemed to accept it, because she sighed and released them.

“Sit down, now. You two need to learn to amuse yourselves in less destructive ways”

They took their seats. Flo grabbed Peter’s hand under the table, and Peter was happy to squeeze it. He flopped back in his seat while Ms Hathersage started taking the register. He was feeling dreadfully worked up. But at least it wasn’t as bad as it could have been. Wendy had kept her mouth shut. And as much as Peter clashed with Nigel, at least Nigel never intentionally got Peter into trouble - in fact, he actively protected him from it. Peter had to give him credit for that.

-

Flo fixed Peter with a heavy stare at break time when they were sat at their usual round table by the coffee machine in the dining hall.

“Ok, I’m just going to say it” Flo said. “I know everything in the news is a rumour, and your dad’s not your dad by anything more than adoption”

Peter nodded.

“But I don’t really want to talk about that story. What I _do_ want to talk about is your relationship with Nigel”

Peter was a little taken aback by that. He looked at Millie for help.

“I think that’s a good idea, Flo” Millie said. “I’ve got questions too”

Peter sunk in his seat. He sighed to himself. If only Macy were here: she would have been on his side on this one. 

“It doesn’t make any sense” Flo said. “A lot of the time it’s like you hate each other, but then he always picks you for his team in PE, or his group in drama when we’re 50/50, and-”

“And he never dobs you in for anything” Millie interrupted. “He’d let you get away with murder”

“Just like this morning. He protects you with his life, you know” Flo said. “And then, of course, there’s Wendy. He only got cross with you today because you went to push her”

“There’s a big family honour thing in their family, apparently” Millie said. “Still, you didn’t have to punch him like you did. It was a little extreme”

“But also kind of warranted” Flo said. “And then, of course, there’s the way he looks at you”

Peter pressed his lips together. He usually told Flo everything, but he hadn’t told her about the (many) occasions where Nigel had dragged him into a store cupboard (and once into the PE office when it was empty), and got off with him. Peter wasn’t exactly proud of letting that happen, especially more than once. The only person he’d told was May, but since she was dead and he was talking to her grave, it hardly counted.

“Do you like him, Peter? Because I honestly don’t know a lot of the time” Flo said.

“He winds you up, doesn’t he?” Millie said.

Peter nodded. He wasn’t going to reach for his whiteboard for this. It was far too awkward.

“So _do_ you like him?”

Peter shrugged. He supposed Nigel could be good fun sometimes. He was quite funny and charismatic in his own way. But a lot of the time he was rude and defensive and annoying and liked winding him up. And sometimes he was downright cruel. So Peter wasn’t sure. 

“ _Talk_ , Peter!” Flo whined, pushing his whiteboard at him.

“How about we go over to the boarding house at lunch? You’ll be able to talk better in Macy’s room with just us three around, won’t you?” Millie suggested.

Peter didn’t really react, but he didn’t look happy.

“Right, that’s settled” Flo said, clapping her hands together. “At lunch, we’ll visit Macy and have a good heart to heart debate on her sick bed”

That seemed to make both girls happy, because they turned the conversation onto finishing their coffee and bagels in time for the next lesson. As much as it would be nice to see Macy, Peter definitely didn’t want to waste his lunchtime under a metaphorical spotlight, being quizzed about Nigel. He had a feeling he knew what he needed to do.

-

Peter couldn’t go over to the boarding house. He couldn’t face that conversation. He wouldn’t want to talk about it at the best of times, but much less today; after he’d had a fight and was still feeling a bit funny about the news segment on channel six the previous night. He could whine and bitch all he wanted, but there was no guarantee that two people as strong-willed and heavy-headed as Millie and Flo would let him weasel out of it easily. 

There was, however, one surefire way of getting out of it: getting a lunchtime detention. That wasn’t always as easy as it sounded, but if there was one person who was an expert on this state of affairs, Peter knew exactly who to go to. Someone he’d gotten into trouble with before. Someone who boarded despite his family living a mere twenty minutes from the school. Someone Tony Stark saw as a Bad Influence. And someone with a soft spot for Peter Parker-Stark.

-

Malaki grinned up at Peter when he approached his desk. 

“Hello, Curly, my darling” he said, taking Peter’s hand and kissing the back of it. “You ok?”

Peter looked over his shoulder. Millie was helping Flo change the needle on the sewing machine they were using, so they were both occupied and not paying attention to him. Peter sat down beside Malaki. Malaki put an arm round Peter’s shoulders, leaning into him.

“Well, isn’t this lovely?” he smiled. “You’re over here for a reason, aren’t you?”

Peter nodded. 

“Don’t worry; they’re still fighting with that bobbin” he said, keeping an eye on Millie and Flo. “What can I do for you?”

Peter scribbled a message on his whiteboard. Malaki read it carefully. He looked at Peter.

“Leave it to me, gorgeous~” he smiled. “We’ve got this lesson and next to sort you out - and I will, don’t you worry”

Peter let out a sigh of relief and gave him a hug by way of thanks. Malaki smiled at him.

“Just a second, curly” he said. “HEY, MS CASTLETON!”

“MALAKI! Don’t shout!” Ms Castleton shouted, coming over to his desk. “What is it?”

“Peter’s feeling a bit sick. Is it ok for me to take him to get a drink and some fresh air?”

Ms Castleton looked at Peter. 

“Hm… You do look a bit pale” she said, feeling his forehead. “You’re a little bit warm too” she nodded at Malaki. “Go and get a drink and some air. It’s quite hot in here; maybe that’s what’s making you feel unwell”

“I’ll look after him, miss, don’t worry”

“Don’t try your luck, Malaki Owens. You’ll stay after school if you don’t make progress on your project”

Malaki merely smiled at her. 

-

Peter wasn’t entirely sure why Malaki had come up with this fib, but he played along. He’d been feeling a bit funny anyway, and being out of the classroom helped. Malaki got them both a bottle of water from one of the vending machines, and they sat outside in the bandstand.

“She’s right about that classroom being hot” Malaki said. “I swear she’s got hidden heaters all over the place”

Peter nodded slightly, sipping his water.

“So… You’d tell me the truth if I asked you a question, right?”

Peter nodded.

“Tony Stark… You haven’t done a DNA test, have you? All the papers say they’re offering you them and stuff. But have you done one?”

Peter shook his head. 

“Didn’t think so… Hey, Peter? Do you… do _you_ think he’s your dad? Like, biologically, I mean?”

Peter shook his head. He picked up his whiteboard.

_There’s no way he could be. I had a mum and dad when I was a baby, before they died and I went to live with my aunt. I don’t think we look *that* similar, either_

“Weeell… There’s definitely a resemblance” Malaki said. “You seem pretty sure about this”

_I am sure. I can’t remember them anymore and I can’t remember much about them, but my first parents were just normal people, like, a normal couple living a normal life. As far as I know, there wasn’t even anything interesting about them. I think they were both civil servants. May never really talked about them much, actually. I think she tried when I was young but then I guess I got older and didn’t remember and stuff so maybe she gave up. Or maybe she thought I was better off just moving on. I don’t know._

He turned over his whiteboard and continued on the other side.

_I know this sounds really bad, but I don’t really care. I used to, when I was younger and all my friends had parents and stuff, but now I’m just indifferent to it. I never really knew them so I guess I can’t care. Now I’ve got a different family, one I do actually know. Look, I love my dad, yknow, my actual Tony-Stark dad, but he’s definitely not my biological one_

“Yeah… It doesn’t sound that bad, really. You can’t really have any emotional connection or proper feelings about people you don’t remember and probably didn’t really know. You were only little, right? They’re effectively strangers in that case then, don’t you think?” Malaki said. “For Tony Stark, I guess it’d be way too much of a coincidence, and if he was, he’d’ve been in touch with you when you were tiny, right? You’d know if you had a chance of making a baby, right?”

Peter nodded. 

_Dad said even though he was a major slut, he always used protection. The papers are just after a good story_

“Well, they’ve achieved that much” Malaki said. “I was home at the weekend, and even _my_ parents were talking about it”

_Oh. What do they think?_

“Mum says if you were, you’d’ve been taken away from Queen’s and into billionaire town as soon as he knew about you. Like, she said he could’ve fought for custody and he would’ve won cos he’s rich” Malaki said. “Dad thinks you are, though. He said that when someone sleeps with that many people, and are that busy and stuff, that it could happen and it could’ve been years before he found out and found you. He said that your dad used to have loads of one night stands with people he’d never see again, so you’re probably from one of them, and they had no way to get in touch. But then _mum_ was like, well, if someone had been carrying Tony Stark’s baby, they’d go straight to the papers and then he’d’ve ended up knowing pretty quickly even if she didn’t, like, have his phone number. So they’re on different sides of the table. They talked about it for a pretty long time”

_That’s so weird. There’s probably been hundreds of people I’ve never met talking about me and my family because of this_

“I can only really imagine. I mean, it was weird for _me_ , because they were talking about my friend - my curly! - and it was like, they were talking about a news story, but also someone I know? It’s weird trying to explain it”

Peter nodded. He took a minute, thinking.

_Do you think asking for a DNA test is weird? Because if the press have made up their minds, surely they should think that we know the answer for definite and are just hiding it? So what would a DNA test change for them? Is it to guilt trip my dad?_

Malaki blinked at him, trying to comprehend it. “Uhh… I’ve not really thought about it, but I guess maybe it is a bit weird. I mean, even if you did do a DNA test, it’d only benefit them if the results went public, right? Why does it matter if you’re his or not anyway? What _would_ it change?”

Peter shrugged.

“Do you think it’d be weird, like, if you were, and it changed who you thought you were or something?”

Peter thought for a minute before scribbling on his board again.

_My parents were Richard and Mary Parker, they died and I lived with Ben and May Parker, and then Ben died, and then May died and I went to live with Loki and Tony Stark, and then they adopted me. I know where I came from but that doesn’t matter as much as knowing who I am. And I am Peter Benjamin Parker-Stark, and I live in a giant house and I go to a posh school with you and the bunnies and idiots like Nigel and Wendy, and most of the time, even though I’m kinda ill, I’m happy_

Malaki laughed slightly. He put his arms round Peter, resting his cheek on his shoulder.

“At least you know who you are. Even people who have only ever had one set of parents don’t always know that”

Peter nodded slightly, cleaning his whiteboard. He hesitated and then wrote another message.

_What do you think?_

Malaki read the message a few times over, thinking. 

“Uhh…”

_You’re not allowed to lie to me_

Malaki swallowed. He lifted his head, looking at Peter.

“You know I believe everything you say” he said. “…My parents talked about it a lot, like I said. My sister talked about it a bit too. I listened mostly, but I said stuff too… You know, at first I thought it was rubbish, because we’ve seen all this kind of story before. But this one seems different. It’s like, it feels like it’s full of facts, and some of the stuff they say and point out and that, does make it sound like they actually know what they’re on about, even though they’re mainly tabloids and chat shows and stuff”

_You’re being evasive_

Malaki closed his mouth and rested his cheek back against Peter’s shoulder.

“…I agree with my dad”

-

Peter didn’t feel great. He went back to textiles with Malaki, and the rest of the lesson went by smoothly enough. But he didn’t want to be there. He wanted to go home so badly. He wanted to pull a sickie so they’d call his parents. But he knew it wasn’t the best idea.

Instead, after textiles, he let Malaki drag him to his locker.

“My plan is simple” he said, picking something up. “A couple of these should do”

_Is that a party popper?_

“Well, yes, but not a normal one. Look, I’ve got a normal one in here. I’ll show you. So, these do this” he pulled the popper, and little streamers of paper splattered over the contents of his locker. “They’re little, right? _These_ things are big, and they don’t just have streamers: they have sequins and glitter too. They’re pretty impressive. I tested them in Mr Hardwoods study at the boarding house. Here, you take one, and I’ll take the other”

Peter took the large party popper he was given. He looked at it doubtfully. They’d probably get shouted at for firing them in the corridors, but Peter doubted it would end in a detention. 

“Ok, come with me” Malaki said, checking his smart watch as they walked along. “Ok, so Mr Pipe-Fowler should be finished with that meeting. There’s no one important in attendance so he won’t be lingering afterwards”

Peter glanced at Malaki’s watch. The screen was too small for him to make out everything he was flicking through, but it looked like he had all sorts of plans and blueprints on it. It was another one of those strange moments where Peter found himself agreeing with Tony’s opinion of this friend.

-

Malaki stopped outside Mr Pipe-Fowlers office.

“They work just the same as regular party poppers” he said. “Point it slightly upwards and pull the string when I do”

Before Peter knew what was happening, Malaki’s hand was on the door handle. Peter didn’t feel sure now, but there was no going back. Malaki flung the door open and sprung into the room. Peter had no choice but to do the same. Peter realised a second too late that the room was occupied. The big poppers were much louder than Peter had expected, and all in an instant, the whole room was covered in streamers, sequins, and glitter. There was a moment of silence, and then Malaki was shrieking with laughter, and Mr Pipe-Fowler was shouting, and it was all very overwhelming and confusing. 

Malaki was laughing entirely too much, once again refusing to grasp the gravity of the situation. Mr Pipe-Fowler was shouting more than Peter had ever heard from him before. Peter wasn’t really registering what was going on because it was all so loud, and all of a sudden the headmaster was in front of them. He grabbed hold of Malaki, but when he made a grab for Peter, the boy flinched. 

“Peter?”

Peter was surprised at himself for flinching so much. He looked at the old man warily, and slowly straightened. Mr Pipe-Fowler sighed. He glared at Malaki.

“Owens!” he snapped. “Be quiet!”

Malaki managed to calm down a bit, still pink in the face from laughing, and still giggling whenever he looked at Peter. Mr Pipe-Fowler looked at him distastefully, and turned to Peter.

“Master Parker, we’ve had this conversation before” he said. “We warned you that you’d only end up in bother staying so well acquainted with Owens. I will be writing to your parents about this”

Peter swallowed. He hoped it would be a letter and not an email, so that he could get to it first and make sure they never saw it. They had enough on their plates without another “To the parent/guardian of Peter Parker-Stark” letter.

“You might well look ashamed. You’re better than this, Parker” he looked at the two boys. “You’re going to be late for your next lesson. It’s Physical Education for you next, is it not?”

“Sure is!” Malaki grinned.

Mr Pipe-Fowler wasn’t amused. “Detention this lunch time, both of you. Parker, go off to your lesson. Owens, we’ve got a form to fill out”

-

Peter still wasn’t sure what to make of Mr Pipe-Fowler, he thought to himself as he got changed for PE. On the one hand, he looked like something out of the Victorian era (although, considering the school uniforms and the school itself looked likewise, maybe it was apt), and often acted like it too. On the other hand, he’d always been very understanding about Peter’s selective mutism, his situation right at the start, and any changes to his situation since. And, he was one of the only teachers who still called him Parker. After he was adopted and became Parker-Stark, most people very swiftly moved on to Peter Stark or Stark when addressing him, but Mr Pipe-Fowler still called him Parker, which Peter liked and appreciated. He was a bit of an enigma.

Malaki was an enigma too. He came waltzing into the changing rooms ten minutes after Peter, looking as though he didn’t have a care in the world. He ignored Mr Musgroves explanations of orienteering and showed off his black slip to Peter and everyone else who dared look. It was quite a nasty one by all accounts, and Peter didn’t understand how Malaki was taking it so well. Malaki took _all_ his corporal punishment slips really well - almost as though it was an achievement to get one - and Peter had never really understood it. For a long time Peter though he didn’t understand it because he himself did not often take his slips well. 

There were two occasions that Peter was famed for in regards to cp slips. The first was quite early on at St Hendricks, when a substitute teacher had grabbed him by the wrist and smacked his palm much harder than strictly allowed with a wooden ruler, and he’d cried so much he’d been sent out of the room. The second famed occasion was the time Mr Tucker (Peter’s geography teacher, who had never really warmed to him) raised a ruler to him, and Peter, without thinking, had snatched it from him and snapped it in two. 

These were quite exceptional circumstances, and both had had an effect on the way teachers were with him - aside from the upper hand he already had from everyone being in awe of Tony Stark and slightly terrified on Loki Stark, and the fact he’d cried so easily when he first started at the school. Generally, if he was facing cp or a slip, Peter would either cry, kick off, or simply stare the teacher down in a way that said “do your best”, and then act as though nothing had happened as soon as it was over. It seemed to vary quite a lot.

So Malaki, who was known for laughing when threatened with a red slip, was on another plain of existence. 

“Malaki!” Mr Musgrove sighed. “Put that slip away and get changed”

Malaki shrugged in a care-free manner. “Sure thing, Mr M!”

Malaki sauntered off to one of the cubicles to get changed. Nigel caught Peter’s eye, and they exchanged a look. Peter had a feeling Malaki confused Nigel just as much as he confused everyone else in the school.

-

Peter was put in a group with Malaki, Nigel, and a boy called Percy for orienteering. It wasn’t a group Peter would have chosen. He didn’t like being in groups with Malaki, because he usually ruined everything, intentionally or otherwise. Nigel was usually good to work with, but considering their rocky relationship and the events of the morning, he would rather not have been with him. besides, he really clashed with Malaki, so why Mr Musgrove had put them in a group together was beyond him. As for Percy… 

Well, Peter didn’t know him very well. He was Percy Perkins, and everyone had called him Peck-Peck since he was about four years old. As Peter understood it, Peck-Peck had been trying to get rid of that nickname for years, but it had followed him when he started at St Hendricks, and no one would stop calling him it because it was such a habit. Peter felt a bit sorry for him, but he also thought it could have been worse. He also thought it was extra unfortunate to try to shake off a nickname like Peck-Peck when you looked quite like a bird.

After being pinned to the floor in front of the whole form, Nigel had wound his neck in, and didn’t mention the news story or Peter’s supposed parentage. Malaki was contented with his earlier conversation on the topic and didn’t say anything either. Peck-Peck wanted to say something about it, but, as much as he’d never admit it, he was a little bit scared of Peter, so he didn’t dare.

As expected, Malaki managed to ruin everything fairly quickly. 

“For god’s sake, Malaki!” Nigel shouted. “We’re _all_ going to get into trouble because of you! Why can’t you be serious for once?!”

“Well, what would be the fun in that?” Malaki said. “Orienteering is rubbish. It’s not even a sport, and it’s hardly a challenge either. It’s essentially an outside Geography lesson - and not a very good one either”

“If you ever get stranded with nothing but a map and a compass, you’ll be buggered, Owens” Peck-Peck scowled. “We could’ve been finished already if you didn’t keep messing about”

Peter leant back against the fence, watching them argue. He always had to leave his white board in the changing rooms during PE, which was fair enough, but it did mean that he very much turned into a spectator during PE arguments. Funnily, they were quite a common occurrence. 

“Put it this way” Malaki was saying. “If we don’t go running about and getting all hot and sweaty, we don’t have to shower”

“You don’t really run about in orienteering anyway!” Peck-Peck said. “Besides, showers are hardly something you want to get out, surely? They’re not exactly a bad thing”

“They are when you’re in the big open shower with this one” Malaki said, elbowing Nigel in the ribs.

“Ow! Malaki! Keep your hands to yourself”

“Technically, it was my elbow”

“You’re ridiculous” Nigel growled. “What’s so intimidating about open showers anyway? You’re only in there to wash. I think you and Peter are the only people who have a problem with it”

“Peter doesn’t have a _problem_ with it”

“He does!” Nigel insisted. “Why else would he always use the cubicle shower? He always uses a changing cubicle too”

“Maybe it’s because he knows you’d stare at him and try to start awkward conversations”

“You’re both being ridiculous” Peck-Peck said tiredly. “We’re not _talking_ about Peter, anyway. We’re talking about you and your big problem with open showers”

“And having a wet head for the rest of the school day” Malaki pointed out.

“Don’t wash your hair then”

“I’d get hair dye everywhere anyway” Malaki said, running his hands through his newly-black hair. “Black is a bugger to work with”

“You’re an idiot” Nigel said. “There’s nothing wrong with open showers”

“Look, I’ll admit that the idea of being in a steamy room with eleven other naked guys should be a dream come true. But tragically I hate most of you, and those of you I don’t hate, I don’t want to ruin by seeing naked. Aside from maybe Peter here”

Peter scowled and smacked him one.

“Ow! Sorry, curly”

Peter rolled his eyes.

“Are we going to complete this course or not?” Peck-Peck said. “Mr Musgrove will go mad if we don’t get back with all our squares punched and our clues solved”

“Aww, we’ll just get Peter to look at him with that sad look in his eyes” Malaki said.

“How about we push you over instead? Then we can use your cut knees as a good excuse for being so far behind”

“OR we could just do the course” Peck-Peck said, snatching the map from Malaki. He looked at Peter. “We need to go north west”

Peter handed him the compass. He was happier sat back doing nothing. Besides, watching Malaki and Nigel argue was amusing. 

“Come on” Peck-Peck sighed.

“Why should we?” Malaki said.

“Because I’ll punch your lights out if you don’t!” Nigel threatened.

Malaki sighed. “You’re so _violent_ , Nigel. So violent”

“I’ll show you violent!” 

Nigel went for him, but Malaki dodged and Nigel accidentally hit Peter instead. Peter knew it was an accident, but he hit back instinctively. 

“No one hits my Peter!” Malaki shouted, pouncing.

It was all a little bit mad. Peck-Peck intervened, grabbing Peter and pulling him back out of harms way. It was a little awkward - Peter wasn’t sure how he felt about having Peck-Pecks arm round his chest and a hand under his shirt, on his stomach.

“Would you two stop it?!” Peck-Peck shouted. “This is why no one ever wants to work with you, Owens! We’re going to get into so much trouble. AND you hurt Peter”

Malaki stopped, stepping back, and Nigel did too. They scowled at each other. Nigel cleared his throat and looked at Peter. 

“Are you ok?”

Peter nodded.

“…Good” he sighed. “Peck-Peck, let him go”

Peck-Peck did. 

“It’s Percy” he mumbled.

No one took any notice. Nigel glared at Malaki.

“Shut up. Let’s get going”

-

Malaki plonked himself down next to Peter in detention.

“Aww, don’t look at me like that” he said. 

Peter wasn’t happy with Malaki. As predicted, they’d gotten into trouble because of him, and then Malaki had started a fight with Nigel in the showers. Peter was in a cubicle and didn’t see, but he certainly heard it. Peter was too tired to deal with any more drama.

He’d had his lunch with Millie and Flo, but they were annoyed at him for getting a detention and even though they tried to hide it, Peter could still sense it.

So he wasn’t in the best of moods when he turned up to detention, and having Malaki plonk down beside him didn’t help, especially when he flopped against his shoulder.

“You’re welcome” Malaki said.

Peter gave him a little push.

“Aww, don’t be like that! I know you love me really~”

Peter gave him a proper push.

“STARK!” Mr Decade, the supervising teacher, shouted. 

“It’s alright, sir” Malaki said. “We’re just messing about”

“Well you shouldn’t be” Mr Decade shouted. “This is detention! Owens, move to the other side of the room”

Malaki shrugged and stood up, waltzing over to the other side of the room. Peter watched him, half zoning out. Mr Decade got up from his desk and marched over. He grabbed the back of Peter’s chair, turned it round, and shoved it under a desk facing away from Malaki.

“Don’t even _think_ about turning around, Stark”

Peter scowled.

“You brought this on yourself. Do your homework or daydream; I don’t care. Just keep your mouth shut, and don’t look at Owens”

Peter raised an eyebrow at him. Mr Decade laughed slightly.

“You take after your parents, Stark”

He went back to his desk. Peter rested his elbow on the desk and his face on his hand, and stared out of the window. There wasn’t much to see, but at least it meant he didn’t have to look at Malaki.

-

“I’m not happy with you” Tony said in the car on the way back from school.

Peter didn’t say anything.

“I got an email this afternoon” Tony continued. “From Mr Pipe-Fowler”

Peter pressed his lips together. He’d hoped it would be a physical letter.

“I take it you know what it was about” Tony said. He went quiet, waiting. “Anything you have to say for yourself?”

Peter stayed quiet.

“Peter” Tony persisted. “Come on”

“It was Malaki’s idea!”

“I gathered that much” Tony said tightly.

“Look, it’s not a big deal!”

“Isn’t it? You’re being led astray. I’ve told you time and time again to keep away from Malaki. Why did you do it, kiddo? You’re better than this”

“…I needed a detention”

“What?! How could you _possibly_ ‘need’ a detention?! You silly little-”

“I _did_! It was either that or pull a sickie. I needed to get out of lunch time”

“But _why_?”

“Because Millie and Flo were pressuring me and they were gonna make me go over to the boarding house so we were alone in Macy’s room so that I’d speak to them, and I didn’t _want_ to speak to them, so-”

“Hey, hey, Peter, calm down” Tony said. “Why didn’t you want to talk to them? What is it?”

“They were going on about Nigel and trying to get me to talk about what I think of him and what kind of relationship we have and stuff, and I didn’t want to talk about but they did, and they weren’t gonna drop it, and the only way I could get out of it was to make sure I had to be somewhere else at lunchtime!”

Tony was quiet for half a minute.

“…Why? Why is talking about Nigel so bad? I know you two don’t get along, but still. Why did it get brought up?”

Peter looked down at his shoes. “…We had a bit of a fight this morning”

“What? Peter!”

“It was his fault! He was saying all this stuff about the whole news thing, and then that stupid bitch Wendy-”

“Peter!” Tony snapped.

“What?! She _is_ a bitch. So _she_ got involved, and basically Nigel took her side, obviously, cos they’re cousins, and he was defending her, so he grabbed me, and I hit him, and-”

“I get the general idea” Tony sighed. “What did your teachers say?”

“Ms Hathersage came in when I’d already won, and Nigel told her we were just messing about, and she believed us”

Tony sighed heavily. “You’re a menace, Peter. You need to have your backside smacked”

“You’re not funny”

“I’m not joking”

Peter scowled at him. 

“Enough of the face, Peter” Tony sighed. “I’ve had a hell of a day: I can’t be doing with your moods”

“I’ve had a hell of a day too” Peter grumbled.

“I know, kiddo… Well, when we get home, I’ve got stuff to do. Have you got any homework?”

“Only Science”

“Well, you can sit and do that when we get back. I need you out of the way for a while”

“Charming”

Tony couldn’t help laughing. “You’re so much like your dad sometimes. So much like your dad…”

-

Loki sat next to Peter in the reading nook.

“Excuse me, but you appear to have stolen my window seat”

“Mm…”

“What’s the matter, chick?”

Peter shrugged.

“Your father showed me the email from the school. You’re lucky you only got a detention”

“Everyone blamed Malaki”

“He’s a bad influence on you”

“Everyone says that”

“They’re all right to say it” Loki said. “Dad also told me what you said in the car”

“Mm… He said I needed my bum smacked”

“I see. And is that what you got?”

Peter shook his head. 

“I can’t say I’m surprised though. Your dad isn’t very happy”

“Are you just in here to have a go at me?”

“I’m not having a go at you”

“Then don’t”

“I’m not!” Loki sighed heavily. “I’m really not. I’m just seeing if you’re ok”

“Well, I’m not!” Peter snapped. “I’m sick of this! I’m sick of this whole news story and the way it’s making dad act, and the way it’s making everyone talk, and I’m sick of people at school talking about it, and I’m sick of the rumours being treated as fact”

“I understand that. It’s a less than ideal situation” Loki said. “I can see why it’s upsetting for you”

Peter looked at him. “Malaki believes the rumours too”

“I see”

“Why can’t people just mind their own business?”

“Humans are very bad at that” Loki said, putting an arm round Peter’s shoulders and pulling him close. “This won’t go on forever, you know. It will be over before you know it”

“You don’t know that” 

“No, I don’t. But I can hope. It’s having such a bad effect on your dad. It’s having a bad effect on all of us… No matter what they say, you know where you come from. I adore you, Peter. You’re my little boy”

“Nigel said he bets you had something to do with my conception”

Loki laughed. “Now there’s a thought! We might be cut from the same cloth, but I can assure you I am definitely not your biological father. I’m part of the jaffa club, remember?”

“That sounds kinda harsh” Peter said. “Still, it’s nice that you’re at a point where you can like, laugh about it”

“Well, I wouldn’t say that, exactly” Loki said. “But I’d say I’ve accepted it. I’ll never be able to make a baby, but I’ve already got you, and that’s more than I ever thought I’d have. And you mean the world to me”

“You’re a really good dad, you know”

Loki laughed slightly. “Thank you. Now, are you planning on moping in here all night?”

“Are you?”

“What do you think?”

Peter gave him a look, and Loki gave him a squeeze.

“Come on. Let’s go and annoy dad for a while. He’s had a bit of a day of it. Marco’s hit a dead end”

“I like Marco. He buys me Reese’s Pieces”

Loki laughed slightly. “So easily bought. Now, come on; let’s go and see dad”

-

Tony was sat on the sofa, looking at his phone with a pained look on his face. 

“Hello, darling” Loki said, sitting down beside him. “Are you ok?”

“Mm” 

Loki carefully took his phone from him. 

“That’s enough for one night” he said gently. 

Tony sighed. He didn’t say anything, but he made a funny little noise when Loki hugged him. Peter climbed into Tony’s lap, and Tony wound his arms round him.

“Hey, baby”

“Hey, dad”

Tony held Peter close and closed his eyes. He focused on the feeling of holding his son, and of Loki’s arms around him. He took a deep breath and released it slowly. All of this would blow over soon enough.

*


	3. Off My Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just as a note, if you're American (or otherwise not from the UK), please take the talk of the adoption process towards the end of this chapter with a grain of salt. It is accurate as stipulated by gov.uk and the adoption order Form A58 and supporting documents. Of course legal processes differ from country to country, so don't take it as fact for your country if you're not from the UK.
> 
> Also, as stated before (and as any long-time readers will know) I am English and my New York is essentially New York in name and nothing else. I write for the storylines and the catharsis, not to create an authentic America AU, so a lot of my fact, while accurate, just UK based and not US based. Of course this is just my way of writing - it's not meant to cause offence - it is just a hobby, after all. I know you'll all understand, because we all know fanfic is just a bit of fun!
> 
> As always, any questions/comments welcome. Thank you everyone for reading

-

Tony forgot to set an alarm, and as a result woke up late the next day. He went into Peter’s room and gave the boy a shake.

“Wake up, chick”

Peter stirred. He woke up and rubbed his eyes.

“Hi… What time is it?”

“It’s half eleven, chick”

“What?! Isn’t it Tuesday?!”

“Yeah, I forgot to set an alarm” Tony said. “I guess we both needed that lie in. What do you wanna do?”

“Um… I don’t really know”

“Do you wanna stay home today? You’ve already missed basically the whole morning”

“I don’t know. I think maybe I should go”

“Alright kiddo” Tony said. “Well, we’ll get you something to eat and then we’ll get you to school in time for afternoon lessons. Ok?”

“Is that ok? I mean, it’s only two lessons, so you’ll have like less than two hours at home before you have to come back again”

“If you wanna go to school, you can go to school. It’s only a ten minute drive. So what do you wanna do?”

“…I think I should go to school”

“Ok” Tony said gently. “Come on then; let’s get you some lunch”

-

Tony dropped Peter off at school armed with a note detailing a forgotten medical appointment to excuse his lateness (“A little white lie” Tony had said), just in time for afternoon registration. 

“Where _were_ you?” Flo asked. “We were worried! You could have at least texted”

Peter took out his whiteboard. 

_Doctors appointment_

“Oh right” Flo said. “Well, are you ok?”

Peter nodded.

“Oh good. Well, I’m glad”

“Me too” Millie said. “We need you next lesson anyway: you’re in our assessment group”

-

Peter regretted going to school, and it was plain to see from the way he slammed the car door behind him when Tony picked him up afterwards.

“Alright, don’t break my car!” 

“I wish I’d just stayed home” Peter spat. “What a waste of time!”

“Oh oh, sounds like you didn’t have a great afternoon”

“No, I didn’t, and I don’t want to talk about it”

-

Loki and Tony sat down with Peter later that evening.

“I think you need to tell us what’s bothering you” Tony said. “You’ve been funny ever since I picked you up”

“I just had a rubbish afternoon. Can’t we just leave it at that?”

“Well, _why_ was it rubbish?” Tony persisted. “Couldn’t you have talked to the bunnies about it?”

“No, because they were a big part of the problem!” 

“What do you mean?” Loki said.

“Millie was being a cunt”

“PETER!” Tony shouted. “How dare you?! Haven’t we talked about using that word?”

“I don’t _care_!”

“Well, you should, and you definitely will when I’ve washed your mouth out with soap”

Peter growled. “Go away then! If it’s that much of an issue, just leave me alone!”

“Hey, you don’t get to call the shots around here. We-”

“GO AWAY!”

“Peter, stop it” Loki said. “You shouldn’t use that word; you know that. Come on; we just want to help. What happened at school?”

“They were both being so unreasonable! I mean, it was mainly Millie, cos Macy is still ill, and Flo had a music exam so she wasn’t there most of the afternoon. But Millie just seemed to be going out of her way to get to me”

“In what way? Was it because of the news story?”

“Bits of it, but she was going on about yesterday, saying I got that detention on purpose, which I did, but she said it was because I was being evasive and wanted to spend time with Malaki instead of her and the other two, and then she said Malaki was gonna ruin me if I wasn’t careful, and _then_ she got onto the news story and she thinks, she thinks it’s true, the stupid bitch-”

“Peter” Tony said in a warning tone.

“Well, she _is_! And so we got into an argument about that, with her throwing all those ‘facts’ from the telly and papers at me, as though she knows my life better than I do, and then I was like, well, what does it matter? Because I’m still a step ahead of her, cos her dad hates her and never wanted her in the first place, and he’s an abusive bastard, so I bet she wishes she wasn’t really his, and-”

“Peter, that’s so bad” Loki said. “You can’t say things like that”

“Well I’ve already said it, so so what? But anyway, she got even more cross with me, like all upset and stuff, and then she tried to make a point and she snatched my whiteboard pens so I couldn’t say anything back while she made a point, and _then_ we got into a fight over the pens, and then she was like, I’m not talking to you until you apologise, and then I was like, I don’t care. I’m not the one who needs to be apologising: she is. So then she stopped talking to me, which is _fine_ , because she was doing my fucking head in-”

“Enough of the swearing, Peter!”

“Just let me speak!” Peter snapped, scowling at him. “So _anyway_ , she stopped talking to me, so I guess we’ve fallen out. And she’ll tell Flo and then Flo will probably turn against me too, cos she’s known Millie way longer and stuff, and she seems annoyed at me too. At least she’s talking sense about the news story stuff though. But then, but then in class we were discussing like, media and news and tabloids and stuff, and like, everyone was looking at me, and the teacher was trying _not_ to look at me, and it was all dead awkward”

“I see” Tony said.

“It was a bloody nightmare and I’m never going back. Now I feel like I really _do_ need to see a doctor: I feel like my blood pressure is sky high, and my back’s doing that weird hurty thing it did when I had shingles. I wanna see uncle Bruce. I’m going out”

He stood up to go, but Tony and Loki both caught him with an arm round the stomach and sat him back down.

“Woah now, not so fast” Tony said, putting an arm round his shoulders. “I get it; you had a rubbish afternoon. But that doesn’t mean you can just never go back to school, and it’s no excuse for your dirty language. I’m still in half a mind about how to punish you for that”

“Now, now, Tony; he’s upset” Loki said. “Now, darling, I know it’s horrible. Do you really feel unwell, or is it anxiety?”

“ _I_ don’t know!”

“Alright, keep your voice down!” Tony shook his head. “If you really feel that bad, maybe daddy can give you a little check over”

“I want uncle Bruce”

“You’re asking a bit much, kiddo”

“HOW is that asking too much?! He’s round here every week anyway”

“Alright, alright” Tony sighed. “I’ll give him a ring”

-

“Hey, uncle Bruce”

“Hey kid” Bruce said, closing Peter’s bedroom door behind him. “Tony said you requested me specifically”

“Mm”

“What’s up? This big news story getting to you?”

Peter nodded.

“I get it, kid. I know what it’s like having nasty stories about yourself in the news…” he sighed, sitting down on the edge of the bed and opening his bag. “Take your hoodie off”

Peter did as he was told. He watched carefully as Bruce pushed his sleeve up and slipped a blood pressure cuff over his arm.

“I know you’re not a fan, but Tony said I should give you a full MOT while I’m here”

“What do you think?”

“About what?”

“About the news story. About… me and dad” 

Bruce looked at him. Peter was keeping his eyes on the blood pressure cuff. Bruce looked back at what he was doing.

“Well” he said, squeezing the pump to tighten the cuff round the boys arm. “I’m sure Tony would love to have been the one responsible for bringing you into the world” he was quiet for a minute, getting his stethoscope and pressing the chest piece against the inside of Peter’s elbow, listening, and counting. “…He’s not your real dad. Your biological dad, I mean. I think you know that”

“Yeah, I know” Peter said, breathing out and rubbing his arm when Bruce took the cuff off. “I guess a lot of this stuff in the news is kinda like, planting doubt in my mind or whatever”

“Dodgy news people will do that to you” Bruce said. “Can I listen to your chest?”

Peter nodded. He stayed quiet while Bruce checked him over with basically every piece of portable medical equipment known to man. 

“Have you got an ECG machine in there?”

Bruce laughed slightly. “I almost considered it: there’s some of the portable ones paramedics use at the office. Give me your hand again”

Peter let Bruce check his blood sugar.

“Is that everything now?”

“Yes” Bruce said. “Unless… Can I take a blood sample?”

“Why? What are you gonna do with it?” Peter asked defensively. “You’re not gonna do a DNA test, are you?”

“No, of course not. Believe it or not, I don’t really have access to that kind of thing, especially not without written consent from your parents. I was just going to send off for some routine checks”

“I’d rather you didn’t”

“Ok, I won’t force you. Keep pressure on that finger”

Peter nodded, watching Bruce packing up his stuff.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Go for it”

“Do you think people are inherently violent?”

“That’s a strange question” Bruce said, setting his bag aside and sitting down across from Peter. “I think maybe people were more violent back before modern day civilisation, but I think it was for survival. Modern day people don’t really need that type of survival instinct so much anymore, so maybe that’s why they hold back on their strength. Babies and little kids don’t know their strength, but older people probably learn to reserve it so much that they don’t really know it either

“Ok”

“Why? Have you been feeling violent lately?”

Peter looked at him.

“I’ve caught you, haven’t I? I’m an expert on that kind of thing, sadly”

“…Sort of. Not _violent_ , exactly, just… I don’t know, angry. I keep getting all annoyed. I’ve had a lot of fights recently”

“Because of the news story?”

“A couple of them, but not all of them. Some of these fights were before”

“You’re a superhero in your spare time, kiddo. Do those fights bother you?”

“They’re not the same” Peter sighed. “They’re like, a justice thing, not a personal thing”

“I see. And I take it these personal fights are bothering you?”

Peter nodded. “It just kinda happens. Like, it’s all words at first, but then I lash out before I know what I’m doing. It’s weird, like someone else takes over my body”

“I know what that’s like”

“Mm… How do I stop it? You’re a doctor; you know how people work. How do I stop being violent?”

“I don’t think it’s violent. I think you’re just defensive, reacting instinctively, perhaps because of your heightened senses and your stress. I don’t think it’s violent unless it’s vicious. Have you been vicious?”

“I… I don’t think so. I don’t _mean_ to start it or hurt people, and I’m not being malicious. It just keeps happening”

“It’s probably just personality clashes, stress, your illnesses, and hormones” Bruce said. “Happens to most people at some point. Talk to your therapist about it”

“I… I don’t see a therapist anymore”

“Really? Why not?“

Peter shrugged. “You’ll have to ask dad”

“Did you take a disliking to Miss Marns?”

“No; I really liked her. We had a rapport after all that time talking” 

“Maybe you should see her again. It’s good to talk these things out”

“Yeah, I want to… How do you deal with it? Like, staying calm when you’re angry?”

“Kid, I’m the worst possible person to ask about this. If I get too angry, I turn into an enormous green rage monster, remember?” Bruce laughed slightly. “I work in a different way to everyone else on that matter”

“Yeah, I guess so”

“So, what do you think it is?”

Peter shrugged. “What you said, I guess”

“You wanna say something else, don’t you? I can tell”

“…Elton John talked about the Dwight Family Temper in his book. It was like, genetic, the way his bloodline got cross, kinda thing. I’ve never heard of there being a Parker Family Temper, but maybe there is. I never knew my parents properly, and May didn’t really speak about them much, but maybe…”

“Maybe” Bruce nodded. “You know, it could be environmental, too. I know what Loki was like back you were first getting to know him, and I know he still has his moments. Tony can be a right wanker at times too, especially when he gets angry and kicks off. I know they’re pretty calm most of the time nowadays, but you can see where I’m coming from, can’t you?”

“Yeah, especially with dad. Howard Stark was a cross person too, right?”

“I don’t really know. I get the impression he wasn’t very nice behind closed doors. Tony doesn’t really talk about him much”

“Mm… Yeah, he never talks about him to me either”

“Maybe it’s a good thing” Bruce said, standing up. “Try some deep breathing exercises. Or do that thing Tony does where he counts to ten in his head when he’s stressed. This is probably just a phase, kid”

“Yeah, we’ll see” Peter said, pulling his hoodie on. “So, what’s the verdict?”

“Huh? Oh yeah, your MOT. You’re fine, kid. Your pulse was pretty fast, but it calmed down pretty soon. Just anxiety. Everything else looked ok”

“Nothing wrong with my blood pressure then?”

“Nah, nothing wrong with your blood pressure. Although…”

“What?”

“Can you take your shirt off?”

“I’ve only just put my hoodie back on!”

Bruce sat back down close to him. “Are you alright with me touching you?”

“You’ve been prodding me for like, twenty minutes” Peter said. “Go for it. Just don’t go clipping more stuff onto me”

“Deal” 

Bruce pulled Peter’s shirt and hoodie up. He was gentle with him, but the way Peter reacted when he touched his stomach was a little strange.

“Did that hurt?”

“No…”

“Don’t you like your tummy being touched?”

“Not really” Peter mumbled.

“Why not?”

“I don’t know. I just don’t. It even makes me feel weird if my parents do it, even accidentally. It just makes me feel all funny”

“Huh. Strange. Well, I can’t stand people touching the veins on my wrists. We’re all built a bit differently” 

He continued checking him over, and then pulled his shirt and hoodie back down and sat back.

“…What?” Peter said, looking at him sceptically.

“You’re a lot thinner than last time I had to check you over. You’ve definitely lost weight”

“So?”

“So, do your parents know?”

Peter shrugged. “I doubt it. They’ve had a lot go on in the past year. I don’t think me losing a couple of pounds is gonna be at the top of their agenda”

“This is more than a few pounds. How much have you lost?”

“ _I_ don’t know! I don’t weight myself. Get off my back”

“You might not be his biologically, but you seriously take after Tony. You’re so much like him sometimes”

“I’ll take that as a compliment”

“Do that” Bruce nodded. “He’s a great man”

“You’re really sure about him not being blood, aren’t you?”

“Well, yeah. Listen kid; your dad and I are close, and we talk. Even when he was drunk, he put something on the end of it, and he always did it himself so he knew it wasn’t tampered with. Besides, imagine if you were a girl, and you slept with a high-profile celebrity and then found yourself pregnant. You’d be straight down the closest newspaper. If you were his, he’d’ve found out when you were still just a fetus”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right… Hey, uncle Bruce, can you do me a favour?”

“What?”

“Can you get me out of school tomorrow?”

Bruce laughed. “No way, kiddo! My New Years Resolution was not to tell any more lies, even white ones”

Peter sighed. “Well, it was worth a shot”

“Get your little red suit on and go swinging through town for a bit. The adrenaline will do you good”

-

Bruce bit his thumb, listening to Tony speak.

“So you’re really not going to do a DNA test?”

“No! I’m not giving those bastards the satisfaction! I thought you’d understand”

“I understand your stubbornness” Bruce said. “I just think doing the test could be beneficial”

“What, just to give us a piece of paper telling us what we already know? I didn’t make that kid, and everyone knows it”

“You know as well as I do that lots of people believe the rumours” Loki said.

“So?! We know it’s not true, and that’s the important bit, right? I don’t need the test to tell me that”

“No, but maybe having the proof on paper to give to the press would get them off your backs” Bruce said.

Tony hesitated. “It’s still giving in to their pressure though, isn’t it? Besides, what is there to stop all these DNA companies from fudging the results?”

“Do you know how these DNA tests work, Tone? They’ve gotta test 21 genetic markers, and it’s all detailed in a spreadsheet report with all the tested markers, and a column for the alleged father and a column for the child, and it’s all got to be done by a proper laboratory. They’re credible companies, you know”

“How do you know so much about it?”

“It’s a basic fact, Tony. I read it ages ago” Bruce said. “These companies would have to do a lot of work to produce fake results, and if you did a retest with another company and they got discovered, it would destroy their business. Some of these companies charge big money for their paternity tests: it wouldn’t be worth it for them to fudge results just to be part of a newspaper scandal. Besides, if you made your results public and they weren’t fudged, they’d still be a big part of the story, and get more business through being credited. Sorry, Tony, but I think you’re just being paranoid”

While Tony was busy staring at him, Loki responded.

“Banner is right, darling. Faking results wouldn’t benefit anyone”

“Well, what does it matter? I’m not doing a DNA test”

Loki sighed. Tony looked at him, and at Bruce.

“You can’t do one behind my back, either”

“We wouldn’t do that, Tony” Loki sighed. “You know we wouldn’t”

“I know. Still, I’m done talking about this” he picked up his mug and took a drink. “…So what’s the verdict on the baby? Find anything?”

“His obs were all fine” Bruce said. “His anxiety was playing up which made things a little wobbly at first, but he’s fine, mostly”

“Mostly?”

“Well… Have either of you seen him without his shirt lately?”

Loki and Tony exchanged a look.

“Why?”

“He’s looking pretty thin, like, almost worryingly so. He’s a lot thinner than he was when I gave him that check up a couple of months ago after that fall he had. Had you noticed anything?”

“He hasn’t been eating properly for a while” Loki said. “He’s been ill a lot over the past six weeks or so. It’s impacted his appetite”

“Yeah, he hasn’t been eating much. It’s like he doesn’t really feel hungry much”

“What’s been wrong with him?” Bruce asked.

“Just general illnesses” Loki said. “Nothing serious. He’s been doing better recently though, so hopefully his appetite will improve soon”

“I see. Well, I just wanted to make sure you knew about it”

“We’re fully aware” Tony said. “You can’t bring that kind of stuff up with him though: he just thinks we’re overreacting and accusing him of having an eating disorder”

“Oh right” Bruce said, surprised. “Is that… Is that something he’s struggled with in the past?”

“Not exactly” Loki said. “He’s just a bit sensitive about that kind of thing. He’s had some body confidence issues before”

“Poor kid. I swear we didn’t care when we were that age. Kids these days worry too much” Bruce said. 

“Our kid certainly does” Tony sighed. “Where is he, anyway?”

“I told him to go out in his little supersuit”

“Oh” Tony said. “Well, at least he’s getting some fresh air and exercise”

Bruce laughed. “That’s such a dad thing to say”

“Well, what can I say? I am a dad!”

“That’s one word for it” Loki said.

“Oi!” Tony smiled at him. “You’re not funny”

“This news story seems to be affecting him badly” Bruce continued. “Fights at school, all the uncertainty, the anxiety flare up…”

“Yeah… Well, fights at school aren’t just because of this” Tony said, rubbing the back of his neck. “He’s still so different to a lot of those kids. I think they clash. It’s usually the same couple of kids he fights with”

“Are you still considering home-schooling?”

“Yeah, definitely” Tony said. “I think it’d be good for him. You know, comfortable at home, one-on-one tutoring. I think it’d work well for him. It’d work for practical reasons too, like not having to do the school run”

“What about his therapist?”

“Oh, he doesn’t see her anymore, hasn’t done for a while”

“Why?”

“He was doing well. He said he didn’t really need therapy anymore”

“I see”

“He’s made good progress. Still, homeschooling would take more stress out of his life, I think”

“Mm…Have you told him yet?”

“No, it’s still just between me and Loki” Tony said. “It’s still just an idea”

“Well, I guess you’ve got more important things to be thinking about” he said awkwardly. “So, what _are_ you gonna do about this news story?”

“Wait for it to blow over” Loki said.

“Aren’t you going to release a statement?”

“Marco tried to get me to do one” Tony said. “I couldn’t think of anything to say other than ‘fuck off and mind your own business’, so we decided it would be best if we scrapped the idea”

“No kidding”

“Ignoring it is easier said than done, but it isn’t impossible” Loki said. “I’m happy to sit back and act like it doesn’t concern me”

“With all due respect, it doesn’t really. No one’s accusing you of being his biological father”

“That’s because I’m a god, darling” Loki said. “And I don’t look like him. Tony does”

“It still concerns Loki: he’s part of this family” Tony said. “People have been asking stuff down the hospital too”

“Wait a minute” Bruce said. “Loki, was Peter born at your hospital?”

“Haven’t the foggiest”

“Wait, just a minute”

“You’ve already said that” Tony said.

“Shut up, Tony. No, I’ve had a thought” Bruce said. “You don’t need a DNA test to prove you’re not his biological father”

“I know that” Tony said. “That’s what I’ve been saying”

“I know, but this is different. This is something _else_ you could use to prove he’s not yours”

Loki and Tony looked at him. “What?”

“His birth certificate. Just dig that out and use it as proof. People might still have their gossip-based reservations, but it’ll have his parents names on it. Where do you keep it?”

Loki and Tony looked at each other. Tony bit his thumb. Bruce looked at them.

“You’ve lost it?” he guessed.

“We never had it” Tony mumbled. “Why would we? He lived with his aunt up until the explosion. It would’ve been destroyed in that”

“…But surely you would have needed it since?”

“He already had a passport, which was here, and we used a copy of the adoption certificate when we updated his name on it”

“But what about the adoption?”

“What do you mean?”

“Did you need it when you adopted him?”

Tony shook his head. “No. Not personally, anyway. I think they maybe did for the legal bits, but our lawyer and people working with Li Allen took care of that bit. We just filled in the forms and did the meetings. There was a bit saying if we didn’t have a birth certificate to attach, to just put the place of birth, which we did. There was a bit saying they needed us to attach his dead parents death certificates, and obviously we didn’t have those. Not really any of our business. Maybe the lawyers and stuff got those, and his birth certificate. I don’t know. If they got the birth certificate, we never saw it. Adoption certificates replace them anyway, legally, so we didn’t need it” he looked at Loki. “That’s right, isn’t it?”

Loki nodded, but didn’t say anything.

“It was such a long few months. You know we had to let the local council know first, and then we had to wait three months before we could do our court application. We let them know before telling Peter, actually, just in case. We just wanted it done, but it took quite a while. At least he was already living with us. You know you’ve got to have them living with you for ten weeks before you can apply for the adoption court order?”

“Yeah, I think I’ve heard that”

“It was actually so much more difficult than we thought it would be. We read into it before pitching it to the kid, obviously, but there’s so many forms. We had so many afternoons sat with our lawyer going through rules and how to fill in all the forms and apply for the right things, and then actually _doing_ all those forms and applications and stuff. It was pretty tough. It started to feel like they wouldn’t let us adopt him, even though there was no evidence to the fact”

“I can remember you being stressed about it at the time, and I remember seeing the stack of forms you had to send with the paperwork too. And I remember doing that reference”

Tony nodded tiredly. “It was a lot of work”

“The adoption certificate doesn’t have details of his biological parents on it, does it?”

“No” Tony said. “They never do. Like I said; they replace the birth certificate”

Bruce sat back, sighing. “I think you should request a copy of his birth certificate, if you’re not doing a DNA test”

“Why? We don’t need it. I don’t have anything to prove to anyone. The papers will move on at some point, going after some other story. If the only reason to get the birth certificate is to give it to the press, it’s not worth getting”

“I wouldn’t argue any further, if I were you” Loki said. “It’ll be like talking to a brick wall”

“Exactly!” Tony exclaimed. “Thank you, darling”

Bruce sighed, but nodded. “Well, I respect your decision. I don’t have kids, so I can’t really say what I’d do in your situation”

“Thanks, mate” Tony flopped back in his chair, draining the rest of his drink. “If there’s one thing about being a parent that I think I can transfer…”

“Oh, do share” Loki said.

“I love that kid more than anything else in the world, and I’d protect him with my life. Including from the press. I’d happily punch a reporter in the face to keep them away from my boy” Tony said. “I don’t care that we’re not blood related: he’s my son, and that’s more than I ever deserved to begin with”

*


	4. When The Weight Of The World Weighed More Than It Should

-

There was something strange about the way Peter’s parents were acting on Wednesday morning. It wasn’t hard to miss the fact that they suddenly stopped talking when he came into the room, or that they huddled round the kettle talking in whispers while he was having breakfast. Whatever they were talking about, Peter had a feeling it had to be related to the news story in some way, but other than that, he had no other real clues. He decided to ignore them as best he could, and get ready for school in silence.

-

Jo Jo sidled up to Loki in the break room that afternoon. 

“Hey, my beautiful darling”

“What do you want, Jo Jo?” Loki sighed. “Can’t you see I’m a little bit busy?”

“I can see the bottom of your mug showing through the dribble of tea you have left” Jo Jo said. “What is it? Feeling a bit odd?”

“I’m just not in the mood for another one of your jokes”

“Believe it or not, that’s not why I’m here. In fact, I’m here on business” 

“I see” Loki said, rinsing his mug and setting it on the draining board. “What is it?”

“Well, you know those triplets, the ones that hate me?”

“They don’t hate you, Jo Jo”

“Yes they do” Jo Jo said. “Anyway, they’re due a feed, and I need your help”

“Alright, I’ll give you a hand” Loki said. “You can fill me in on what I’ve missed”

“There’s not much to say” Jo Jo said, walking with him to the nursery. “You were there when they were surrendered”

“Yes, but I would have expected them to go into care very quickly”

“We all did” Jo Jo said. “But since they’ve got health issues, they’re having a bit of trouble finding a placement equipped to look after them properly. Mr Lesley said we might have to consider getting staff to volunteer if nothing shows up soon. Social services only have so many options”

“Indeed” Loki said. “Well, I daresay you’d be hard pressed to get volunteers to look after three newborns with additional needs. I imagine the social want to keep them together, and rightly so”

“That’s what I thought. I think it was just an idea: the social will find something, and until then we’ll just have to look after them here” Jo Jo said. “And only two of them have additional needs. We got further confirmation this morning”

“I see. Who’s in the clear?” Loki asked, pushing open the nursery door.

“Baby A” Jo Jo said. “B and C aren’t so lucky. Mary said Baby A at least should be able to get into a foster placement, but the social do want to keep them together if they can”

“Well, that makes sense” Loki said. “Poor little things”

“They’ll find someone to look after them. They’ll have a decent little life” Jo Jo said. 

“With any luck… Jo Jo, do you want children?”

“Well sure” Jo Jo said, prepping bottles. “When I’m older and I’ve married rich and live in a semi-detached house with two little dogs and a boat for the weekends”

“Jo Jo, you _live_ in a semi-detached house”

“Yes, but I want a bigger one” Jo Jo said, winking.

Loki rolled his eyes. The door opened, and someone ran into the room and threw themselves at Loki.

“Peter?! Hey, what are you doing here?” Loki said, holding him at arms length. “You should be at school! And why are you in your PE kit?”

Peter buried his face in Loki’s front and didn’t say anything.

“Peter, talk to me! Why aren’t you at school?”

Peter whined and held tighter to Loki. Loki and Jo Jo looked at each other. Loki sighed and patted Peter’s shoulder gently.

“Ok, sweetie” he said. “You don’t have to talk just yet… Well, seeing as you’re here, you can help feed the triplets”

Peter slowly let go of Loki and took a step back. Jo Jo smiled at him.

“Good to see you again, baby Stark” he said.

Loki lifted a baby from one of the cots.

“Take Baby B” he said to Peter. “She’s the least fussy: she’s not so ill”

Peter sat down on a nearby chair and let Loki put the baby in his arms. 

“That’s it, you’ve got her”

Peter adjusted his hold, letting the baby get comfortable. Jo Jo handed him a bottle.

“There you go, kiddie” he said. “You know what to do”

Peter took the bottle. Loki rested a hand on Peter’s head for a moment. 

“Well, let’s get these other two fed” Jo Jo said, scooping Baby A - who immediately started yelling - out of her cot. He looked at Loki pointedly. “See?! I _told_ you they don’t like me”

Loki laughed, lifting Baby C, who remained quiet, into his arms. “They’re too young to hate anyone, Jo Jo. She’ll like you well enough when she’s got a bottle in her mouth”

Loki and Jo Jo stood talking quietly together while they fed the babies. Peter stayed where he was, and he looked down at the baby in his arms. He held the bottle to her mouth, and she looked up at him as she drank. Peter focused on his breathing, and on maintaining eye contact with the baby. He started feeling much calmer. There was always something calming about feeding a baby. Peter often went to the hospital to see Loki, and helping out like this really helped him see why being a nurse meant so much to him. He liked holding babies. They were soft and sweet and warm. But nowadays Peter also saw just how strong Loki was, seeing him able to carry on working with babies after facing his own infertility and losing the chance of having a baby of his own. Visiting the hospital also meant that Peter had seen the change in Loki. It was subtle, but a change nonetheless.

“Peter?” Jo Jo said, interrupting Peter’s train of thought. “Are you ok?”

Peter looked at him for a moment and then back down at the baby. 

“Did her mum name her Bea?”

“She’s Baby B. As in, the letter” Jo Jo said. “It’s babies A, B, and C”

“Oh. That’s not very nice” Peter said, setting the empty bottle aside. “Is their mum ill?”

“No, but she gave them up” Jo Jo said. “They haven’t been named yet”

“Well, they should be” Peter said. “They should be more than just a letter”

“Maybe you could help us, then” Loki said. “Any ideas?”

“This one _should_ be called Bea. It suits her” Peter said, looking back at the baby in his arms. “It’s short for Beatrice” 

“What about the other two?”

Peter stood up carefully, stepping closer and looking at the other two babies. 

“Which is which?”

“This one is Baby C” Loki said. 

“Baby C should be called Clara”

“Ok” Loki nodded.

“How about Baby A?” Jo Jo said.

Peter looked at Baby A. She’d finished her bottle and was starting to fuss in Jo Jo’s arms. Jo Jo sighed and put her back in her cot, where she immediately settled.

“I told you she didn’t like me” Jo Jo grumbled.

Loki just laughed. He looked at Peter.

“So. Any ideas?”

Peter nodded. "Adelaide”

“Clara, Beatrice, and Adelaide” Loki said.

“Very old fashioned” Jo Jo said. He smiled. “It suits them”

Loki put the baby he was holding back in the cot and picked up the babies charts. 

“Any ideas for a surname, chick?” 

“March”

Loki raised an eyebrow as he wrote. “You’re good at this”

“Adelaide March, Beatrice March, Clara March…” Jo Jo mumbled. “It sounds good, kiddie. Nice work”

Loki carefully took Beatrice from Peter and set her down in her cot.

“Don’t look so affronted” he said gently. “Jo Jo, do you still need me?”

“No, you can disappear if you need to”

“Thank you”

Loki put an arm round Peter’s shoulders and guided him out of the room. 

-

Peter sat awkwardly on one of the benches in the locker room. Loki closed the door and sat down beside him. 

“I think you should count yourself lucky that it’s my day to pick you up from school, otherwise I may have been forced to call your father and let him know that you’re here” 

Peter didn’t say anything. 

“You know I always love to see you, but not while you’re supposed to be at school! And _why_ are you just in your PE kit? It’s freezing outside! And where on Earth are your school bags?”

“They’re behind the desk with Mary: she said she’d look after everything for me”

“I see” Loki said. “Care to answer any of my other questions?”

Peter scowled and folded his arms over his chest. 

“You look exactly like your father when you do that. Now tell me why you’re here”

“Well… I’ve got this weird lump under my arm and it’s been really hurting and then I hit it and it hurt so much and I got all scared so I thought I should get it checked out-”

“What?! Where? Under which arm?” Loki grabbed Peter’s polo shirt and tugged it up. “Where-”

“Dad, stop!” Peter protested, trying to push him away. “You’re hurting!”

“I need to have a look, Peter! Where abouts is it?”

“STOP IT!” Peter shouted. “There’s nothing there!!”

Loki let go of Peter’s shirt. “What do you mean?”

“I lied to you! I was just messing you about!”

Loki stopped. “I’m impressed. But you shouldn’t lie to me, _especially_ not about your health. Why did you say it?”

Peter shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess it just slipped out. It’s not gonna curse me, right?”

Loki laughed slightly. “That isn’t the way it works, darling… So there’s really nothing medical you need looking at?”

Peter shook his head. “Nothing I’ve noticed. Besides, uncle Bruce looked at me yesterday, so if there _was_ anything, he would’ve found it”

“You’re right” Loki said, a little relieved. “So, why are you here, sweetheart?”

Peter looked away and stayed quiet. 

“Peter, talk to me” Loki said. “And no more lies”

Loki took Peter’s hand and gave it a squeeze. 

“Why don’t you want to tell me?”

“…You’ll get cross and shout at me and smack me and then you’ll tell dad and he’ll do the same”

Loki looked a little shocked. “…Sweetheart, when did I last smack you?”

Peter stopped, thinking. “…Ages ago. Maybe… I think, a few weeks before I got hit with Kindsprengen’s gun and turned into a toddler” he paused, the corner of his mouth turning down. “Dad last hit me the day I got turned into a toddler…”

Loki squeezed Peter’s hand. “I’m not going to shout at you, sweetheart. I can’t promise I won’t get cross, and I certainly can’t promise I won’t tell your father if it’s something he needs to be made aware of”

“But you promise you won’t shout?”

“I promise” Loki said. “Just tell me why you left school early”

“…Well, you know I’ve never really gotten along with Nigel or Wendy… And I haven’t really been getting along with Macy much lately either” Peter said, keeping his gaze down. “You know I told you what happened with Nigel and Wendy, and I told you what Malaki said, didn’t I?”

“About the news story? Yes, you did” 

“Well… Macy thinks the same, and she wouldn’t stop going on about it. She kept saying all sorts of stuff, about me, and about dad. She was talking like she hates us. Especially dad. I don’t know why she’s been such a bitch recently” Peter said. “She said that it was true, and that dad was a slut, and that it made me a bastard, so I had to shove her then, didn’t I?”

“Oh Peter” Loki sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Why couldn’t you just use your words?”

“Do you have any idea how hard it is to argue properly when you’ve got selective mutism?”

“I’ve seen you writing on your white board. You’re very quick”

“Not quick enough. Writing everything down is never gonna be as fast as speaking, and I can’t speak at school, couldn’t say anything, and then she pointed _that_ out too”

“That’s not very nice of her. Was this during PE?”

Peter nodded. “Yeah, so I didn’t have my whiteboard anyway. It was at the start, while we were waiting for the sub to sort stuff out. So anyway, I shoved her, and then she shoved me, so I shoved her again, and she hit me”

“She _hit_ you?!”

“Yeah, but I hit her back! Hard. Like, really hard. And then she kicked me, so I hit her again, and then she called me a bastard again, and she called dad a slut again, so I smacked her really hard, and she fell over and hit her head, and it cut her so there was like, blood and stuff. But Mr Pipe-Fowler saw the whole thing, cos we were outside and he was walking past, and Mr Musgrove tried to defend me, but Mr Pipe-Fowler wouldn’t listen to him, and he sent Macy to the nurses office, and he got me to get my stuff, and then he dragged me to his office, and he was-…” Peter swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the tears in his eyes. “He was so angry, and I wanted to explain it all to him, like, I got my whiteboard out and everything, but he didn’t care. He snatched it from me and he grabbed hold of my wrist so I couldn’t get away, and he shouted at me and his hand was all clammy round my wrist, and it felt horrible, and like, you know, like, when you see a rugby game, and like, there’s like, steam, kinda like, coming off the players? It was kinda like that, and he was shouting so much and he kept being like, ‘look at me!’, and then he just kept shouting, and I tried to get him to get off me, like, I just tried pushing him away, but then he tightened his grip, and he shouted more, and then, and then, and then-”

“Hey, hey, Peter, breathe! Breathe. Just stop and take a few deep breaths”

Peter did as he was told, closing his eyes and breathing deeply. He swallowed hard and held Loki’s hand tight. 

“At least now I know I hate the man” Peter said awkwardly. “…He was horrible. He kept shouting, and then, and then cos I struggled, cos he was hurting my hand, and he… I got slippered. He shouted the whole time too, and it really hurt, and he wouldn’t stop, and it was like it went on forever, and he still wouldn’t let me go even when he let me stand up again, and it was worse than ever cos then I was crying, and I couldn’t stop and I couldn’t breathe and I could only just see, and then, and then he told me I was making a silly fuss over nothing, and I kinda… I kinda growled at him, well… More like a kind of little roar kinda thing, and he kinda got shocked, and I pulled free and I just kinda like, well, he was like ‘stop right there! Where on Earth do you think you’re going!?’, and I was like, well… My voice suddenly like, it kinda managed to, um, well… I told him to go fuck himself, and then I just kinda, just kinda grabbed my bags and ran… And I didn’t know where I was going. I thought about going home, but you know what dad’s like right now, and then I thought about hiding out till school was over, but then I just, I guess, I just, I needed, I needed… I came here. I needed you”

Loki pressed his lips together, one hand up by his mouth, forefinger pressed against his lips. He was quiet for a minute or two, searching the boys face. He kept hold of Peter’s hand, which Peter continued to squeeze. 

“… You do realise you could easily have just gotten yourself expelled”

Peter looked at Loki and promptly started sobbing. 

“Oh sweetheart! Oh darling; come here”

Peter clung to him and howled into his chest. Loki held him tight, rocking him gently. 

“Ok, sweetheart, ok” Loki sighed. “I know, I know. Shh, it’s ok”

“No it’s not!” Peter sobbed. “You’re gonna have to tell dad, and he’s gonna be so cross with me, and if I get kicked out of St Hendrick’s he’ll kill me! And I feel like I’ve lost all my friends!”

“You haven’t, sweetheart, you haven’t. And don’t worry about dad”

“How can I not worry?!”

“He’ll understand-”

“How could he _possibly_ understand?!”

“He’ll understand why you did what you did. Especially if we tell him together” Loki said, rubbing Peter’s back. “We’ll wait and see what the school say when they get in touch. No doubt your father will be hearing from them”

Peter just cried harder. Loki rested a hand on the back of Peter’s head and rested his chin on top of his head. He closed his eyes. He felt awful. There were so many horrible things to deal with already, and this was just one more thing to add to the list. If it had just been the fight, it would be easy to sweep under the rug. But struggling against, growling at, and then _swearing at_ the headmaster? Well, that could potentially be a very serious situation. Personally, Loki didn’t care about Peter’s school - but Tony certainly did. And if Loki felt this dreadful and downtrodden about it, he could only imagine how Tony was going to feel - and react. 

Loki sighed and kissed Peter hard.

“Shhh, chicken. Come on now; breathe. Deep breaths now”

“I can’t!”

“Yes, you can. Just breathe”

Peter managed to calm down. When he’d reached the stage where he was just sniffling, he sat up, pulling away from Loki. He dried his eyes on the hem of his polo shirt. He kept it up near his face, and Loki rested a hand on his back. Peter swallowed, thinking about what had happened. 

“Time to go home, sweetheart”

-

Peter felt better for a little bit on the journey home. It was hard to think about anything much while on the back of a motorbike. Peter’s heart sunk, however, when they reached the garage and all of the cars were there. Peter thought about Tony, and started crying all over again. 

“Oh sweetheart” Loki said sadly. “It’s ok”

“NO IT’S NOT!”

“Hey, hey, don’t shout at me! Shh, alright, I’ve got you. Here, put your bags down”

Peter dropped everything unceremoniously onto the floor. Loki lifted the boy into his arms and took him upstairs.

-

Tony called out when he heard the door go.

“Loki, is that you?”

“Yes, it’s me” Loki called back.

Peter clamped his hands down over his mouth and tried hard to stop crying. 

“What are you doing back so soon? I thought you were going to wait until later so it would coincide with picking- oh” Tony stopped as he came out into the hallway and saw the two of them. “What’s going on?”

“Peter’s had a bit of a time of it” Loki said carefully. 

“Is he ok?”

Peter held his breath, waiting, hoping Loki would hurry up and take him to his room so he could hide and cry.

“Have you checked your emails, darling?” Loki asked.

“Not since this morning” Tony said. “Why?”

“Let’s go to the back room. We need to talk”

Peter started crying harder, and struggled in Loki’s arms. Loki adjusted his hold and held him tighter. 

“Shh, sweetheart”

Tony watched them, his heart starting to thud. 

“…Back room?” he said.

Loki nodded. “Back room”

-

Peter resented the fact that his enhanced strength was no match for Loki. He hated being weak in comparison. He hated that he could do nothing but cry helplessly against his father’s shoulder while his parents talked. 

“Anything?” Loki said.

“Yeah…” Tony said slowly. “There’s an email from Mr Pipe-Fowler…”

Tony read through the email. He read through it again. He paused, and then looked at Loki. He held the phone where Loki could see it. Loki read through the email. He looked at Tony. Tony took the phone back, reading through the email a third time before setting the handset down on the coffee table. There was a short silence. Peter sobbed. He just knew that in a few seconds, he’d be getting shouted at all over again. He felt weak and shaky with nerves. He was expelled, he just knew it.

“Pass him over to me, Loki” 

Peter clung desperately to Loki. “No! No, no, no!”

Loki detached Peter from himself, and Tony pulled the boy onto his lap - which was much harder than expected.

“Hey, hey, kiddo, give it a rest! You’re like some kind of little octopus”

Peter kept squeaking, but he stopped struggling, upset, and confused as to why Tony was speaking so softly to him. Tony sat him on his lap and cuddled him close, stroking his hair. 

“Shh, come on chick; don’t cry like that. Ok, ok, shush now”

Loki took hold of Peter’s hand, and Peter started to settle a little more.

“Alright, chick” Tony said gently. “Listen, listen: it’s ok. Now, darling, you heard what I said: we got an email from Mr Pipe-Fowler. He told us what happened today”

“A-all of what happened?” Peter sniffled, looking at Loki. 

Loki nodded, a pained expression on his face. “Everything, sweetheart”

Peter buried his face in his hands and cried helplessly. 

“Hey, hey, don’t cry so desperately, honey”

“How can I not?!” Peter howled. “I was so stupid! Why do I always have to choose fight over flight?! And now I’ve lost my friends and I’m gonna be the talk of the whole school and then it’ll hit social media and then there’ll be an article about it and the school is gonna kick me out and-”

“Hey, hey, slow down, roadrunner” Tony said. “Alright chick. Alright. Listen; it’s ok. First of all, you’re a Stark: we _always_ choose fight. Secondly, you’ve fought with Macy before, and you’ll probably fight again. I think your friendship is safe. Thirdly, sure, people might talk, but St Hendricks is hardly a hotbed of gossip - and besides, none of them would dare turn it into a big social media story, let alone an article. You can be kinda scary when you want to be. And lastly, the school aren’t going to kick you out”

“Th-they’re not?”

“No, of course they’re not! Mr Pipe-Fowler is scared of all three of us, for one thing, and for another, he’s more forgiving than that moustache would lead you to believe”

Peter looked at him, and then at Loki. 

“Peter, darling” Tony said. “I’ll be honest with you: I’m absolutely appalled with your behaviour. But I understand it, too. You wouldn’t believe the way I’ve acted with people in the past when I’ve been under stress. Your father too. You’re nothing but a little tinker compared to us two. That’s not to say your behaviour is excused - just understood”

“Am I in loads of trouble?”

Loki and Tony looked at each other. Tony looked at Peter.

“No”

“Have I been suspended?”

“No” Tony gave Peter a little squeeze. “Listen, chick… Mr Pipe-Fowler mentioned a couple of other things together - things other than today. He - and some other staff members - have discussed you and your needs. The general consensus is… Well, it’s been decided it may be best for you to start seeing Miss Marns again”

Peter looked at him, confused, and just a little bit relieved. “…They want me to go back to therapy?”

Tony nodded. “I’ll reply and tell him I agree at some point”

“Maybe it will do you some good, chick” Loki said gently. “I think perhaps you stopped going prematurely”

Peter looked up at Tony. “That was your fault”

“Hey, that’s not fair. I thought you were ready, and you agreed when I said you should stop seeing her” Tony said.

“I didn’t want to argue with you” Peter said, tears spilling from his eyes once again. “You were snapping at me loads around the time you said I was better”

“He’s right” Loki said gently. “You were”

Tony looked at him, shocked. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realise”

“It’s alright now” Loki said. “He’ll go back to see Miss Marns. It’s ok”

Tony kissed Peter hard on the cheek. “I’m sorry, kiddo”

“…I’m sorry too” Peter said, wiping the tears from his face.

Tony held him tighter. “I love you, sweetheart”

“I love you too… So I’m really not in trouble?”

“I’m not happy with you, but you’re not in trouble. Although I’m putting you on mental health days, understand?”

Peter paused, and nodded. He didn’t dare argue. Staying away from school was probably a good idea for now. Besides, he was drained. He felt like he might pass out. Maybe it was the emotion and stress and turmoil of it all. Or perhaps it was just the fact he’d missed lunch. 

“Was that your stomach, chick?” Tony said. “Do you want something to eat?”

“I want to go to sleep”

“Is- is that wise?” Tony said, exchanging a look with Loki.

“He’s exhausted, darling” Loki said. “Let him sleep”

Loki tucked Peter up on the futon, and left him to rest.

-

Tony turned to Loki when they reached the kitchen. He shook his head in disbelief.

“How could this happen, Lolly? How could he get to this point without us noticing?”

“How _could_ we notice, Tony? We don’t know what’s going on inside his head. Or anyone’s head, for that matter”

“But he’s our son, Loki! I want better for him; we both do! We should have seen this coming”

“Darling, even _he_ didn’t see this coming. We’ve both had outbursts we didn’t see coming. We’ve all done similar things - and worse things In the past” Loki sighed heavily. “That boy has put up with so much more than any little boy ever should have to - and the past twelve months haven’t been too much better, the poor little mite”

“…What are you saying?”

“He’s _stressed_ , chick. He’s majorly stressed, and we both know it! We’ve known it for a while now” Loki said. “He’s unpredictable even unto himself”

“I know. I just feel like we could’ve done something”

“We couldn’t. Not without the information” Loki said. “But we can try to do a bit more for him now”

“I really don’t need this” Tony said, sitting down at the breakfast bar and resting his head in his hands. “We’ve still got that bloody DNA test pressure and story to deal with - and that’s not calmed down at all since the start. What am I supposed to do? What are _we_ supposed to do?”

“You’ve put him on mental health days” Loki said. 

“Yeah, I suppose it’s a start. Give him some time to, I don’t know, recuperate”

“Darling… He’s been off school so much lately. I know you’re rich, and the school are very understanding” Loki said. “But it’s instances like these that make me think that maybe our idea of home schooling should become something more than just an idea”

“Oh Loki, chick… I really can’t think about that right now”

Loki gave his shoulder a squeeze and went to put the kettle on. He was silent all the time he made the drinks. He set a mug down on the breakfast bar in front of Tony and sat down beside him. Tony lowered his hands and took up the mug, sipping.

“…Do you want to talk about what Bruce said about the birth certificate?”

“No” Tony said. “I want to drink this coffee”

“And after that?”

“I want to cuddle you until Peter wakes up”

“Good” Loki said. “And then?”

“I’m gonna get him fed and then I’m gonna give him a bath and put him to bed. And then I’m gonna eat and have a shower and go to bed myself”

-

Tony was true to his word, although Peter wasn’t too happy about it, especially the bath. Tony wasn’t happy about it either, because he saw the evidence of what had happened in Mr Pipe-Fowler’s office earlier that day, and it made him feel that Peter’s actions were justified - even if they were not.

“Stop squeaking like a stuck little piggy, kid!”

“I _am_ a stuck little piggy!” Peter squeaked. “Let go; you’re hurting me!”

“I’m hardly touching you, kiddo”

“You’re literally crushing me”

“You’re literally overreacting” Tony said. “Now stay still while I finish scrubbing you”

Once Peter was dried and dressed and tucked up in bed, Tony went to find Loki. He leant against the door frame of the living room. Loki looked up.

“Hello”

“Hi”

“Is he asleep?”

“Near enough” Tony said. “Now what do you want for tea?”

“Well, what do you think you can stomach?”

“A big fat greasy takeaway” 

Loki nodded slightly. “Sounds good to me”

*


	5. Politics And Papers

-

Peter couldn’t help being annoyed that his parents had had a takeaway without him.

“How come I had to have soup and you two got a takeaway?” Peter pouted.

“You don’t like kebabs” Loki said.

“No, but I like chips. I would’ve still had something”

“You were in distress” Tony said. “You needed something nourishing”

“I could’ve had salad with my chips”

“Stop trying your luck. It’s done with” Tony said. “Now go and get dressed”

“I don’t want to”

“Tough. Do as you’re told”

Peter pouted and shook his head. 

“Well in that case, I’ll get you dressed myself” Loki said, grabbing Peter and throwing him over his shoulder.

Tony chuckled at Peter’s indignant howls and struggling as Loki took him out of the room. It was a relief being able to laugh at something - even something as silly and mundane as that.

-

Peter put up a good fight, but he was no match for Loki, who was triumphant in his mission. Peter looked at himself in the mirror once it was over.

“I can’t wear this!” he protested.

“Why not?” Loki said.

“It makes me look… cute!”

“You _are_ cute” Loki said. “If you hadn’t made such a fuss, you could have chosen your own outfit. I wouldn’t have had to step in if you’d just been sensible”

Peter scowled. “What am I doing today, anyway?”

“Well, that’s up to you” Loki said. “What do you want to do?”

“I don’t know” Peter shrugged. “I still feel weird because of yesterday”

“I know, chick. Well, perhaps you should take it easy for a while then. Do you want some breakfast?”

“I’m not really hungry”

“Well, a cup of tea at least” Loki said, putting an arm round him. “Come along, chick”

Peter sighed heavily but went along without any fuss. Somehow he felt avoiding another scuffle with his father was probably a good idea.

-

Tony lit up when he saw Peter.

“Aww, look at you in your little dungarees! You look so cute!”

Peter scowled at him, but Tony just laughed. 

“I’m gonna pop into the office. Wanna come with me? We can get bagels on the way”

“I’m not hungry”

“You need to eat, kiddo”

“Fine, I’ll eat!” Peter said, sighing in an exaggerated fashion. “Can’t I just have breakfast here? I don’t want a bagel”

“Ok, ok” Tony said. “We’ll go out in a bit. Now get yourself fed”

-

Peter wanted to get changed before they went out, but Tony wouldn’t let him. Peter adjusted his outfit as best he could, undoing one of the shoulder straps of the dungarees and choosing an outrageous pair of metallic Dr Martens to go with them. He pulled on a hooded jacket too, hoping to give a bit of cover. Tony gave him a squeeze.

“You’re a cute little kid” he said. “Right, let’s get going”

-

Peter didn’t really want to be at the office, but he supposed it was better than sitting round the house with nothing to do all day. He still felt funny after the events of the previous day, so he was hoping for a welcome distraction from that little episode.

Being at the office certainly gave him something else to focus on, as everyone was making a fuss of him. Sadly, the hooded jacket and mad boots were not enough to throw off the cuteness that Loki had bestowed upon him during the wardrobe-based conflict that morning. 

“You’re just darling!” one lady was saying, pinching his cheeks. “I haven’t seen you since you were one of Kindsprengen’s teenager-turned-toddlers. You were wearing dungarees then, too!”

Peter remembered being victim of Kindsprengen’s gun, but he didn’t remember this woman. Like all of the other people who had pinched his cheeks till they were sore in the past, she just blended in as another faceless hand - not exactly something he favoured in an acquaintance.

“Alright, that’s enough” Tony said, kindly but firmly. “You’re making him look like a little Russian doll”

“He’s a cute kid” Another woman said. “Just like his father”

Tony laughed, but it sounded forced. He put his arm round Peter.

“Come on, kiddo: you can give me a hand with some of these papers”

-

Being in Tony’s office gave them some much needed privacy.

“Your cheeks’ll be safe for a while in here” Tony said. “ _Relax_ , kiddo! You look so tense”

“I am tense. I’m going through some stuff, remember?”

“You brought half of it on yourself, you naughty little bastard” Tony grinned. “You take after your parents”

“I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not”

“Well, you can make up your mind while we get some work done”

There was a lot to do, and a lot Peter could help with - which was good, in a way, because it meant he didn’t have time to think about any of his problems.

“You’re good at this already” Tony said, checking Peter’s work. “You’ll make a great successor one day, chick” 

Peter didn’t dare say that maybe he didn’t _want_ to be a successor to Stark Industries. Tony was stressed enough as it was (and so was Peter). Starting an argument wouldn’t do any good for anyone.

-

While they were at the office, everything was fine. It was a different story, however, when they went outside. As always, word had got out that Tony was at the office, and the paps had shown up, ready with their cameras and notebooks and tape recorders.

“Jesus, that’s a lot of reporters” Tony said, putting an arm tight round Peter. “You know the drill, kiddo”

Peter nodded. _Just_ s _tay quiet and walk_. It was always the same.

There really were a lot of people there - much more than Peter had expected. They were loud too; shouting and asking questions, cameras flashing, people pushing and shoving, trying to get their microphones as close as possible. They really were close too: boxing them in, some of them inches away, some of them very almost grabbing them.

 _Just stay quiet and walk_.

Peter’s heart was thumping hard. He felt overwhelmed; hot, scared. He tried to stay close against Tony, hiding as much as he could. It’d be over in a minute.

 _Just stay quiet and walk_.

Something about the continued lack of response and Peter’s obvious apprehension just seemed to make the reporters more insistent.

“Mr Stark, you’ve yet to release a statement about the ongoing story!”

“Mr Stark, is it true that you planned to hide your biological son behind a fake adoption story forever?”

“Mr Stark, if you’re so insistent he’s not your real son, who won’t you do a DNA test to prove it?”

“Mr Stark, I’m a spokesperson for Benchmark DNA Testing, and-”

“Mr Stark, do you-”

“Mr Stark, is it true that-”

“Mr Stark-!

“Mr Stark-!”

“Mr-Stark-!”

Peter stopped walking. Everything sounded so loud, but so blurry, like he was underwater. He felt sick, and tried to bury his face in Tony’s chest to block everything out.

“Alright, kiddo, alright” Tony said, softly. “Come on; just keep walking”

“Mr Stark, your press manager said you wouldn’t be commenting on this story. What do you have to say to everyone about these rumours?”

Tony held tight to Peter and carried on walking, making Peter walk with him. He tried to ignore all of the shouted questions and statements directed at him. He tried to focus on getting his son to safety.

“Peter, have your always known about your true parentage, or is this information news to you, too?”

Tony stopped dead, turning to stare at the reporter.

“Don’t you _dare_ talk to him! Don’t you have anything better to do than hound a little kid?!” he shouted. “Get away from us! All of you! You’re scaring my boy and I’ll sue each and every one of you if you don’t get out of our way!!”

Miraculously, the crowd parted, although there was still a lot of shouting. Tony sped through with Peter, and within a matter of moments they were in the car and on the road home.

-

Peter flopped back in his seat, breathing deeply and trying to calm his thumping heart.

“Here” Tony said, handing him a bottle of water.

Peter took the bottle of water and took a few mouthfuls.

“Are you alright? You were shaking like mad back there, and you still look pretty shaken now”

“…I guess I got a bit scared”

“Those bastards. Who do they think they are?” Tony growled. “Coming to my office, shouting in my face, shouting at my son, taking all those photos”

Peter just nodded. Tony looked at him.

“Maybe it was a bad idea taking you out today”

“It was ok at the office” Peter said. “It gave me something else to do. It was just the outside bit that got to me”

“Yeah…” Tony took his hand and kissed the back of it. “Bloody paparazzi. I can deal with them coming onto me: I’ve never really known any different. But I can’t stand them talking to you and pressuring you. Celebrities kids should be strictly off limits, in my opinion”

“Mm… Hey, um, dad?”

“Yeah?”

“I…”

Tony glanced at him. “What’s up, chick?”

“I… I wanna see Li Allen”

“Ok” Tony said. “I can give her a call and see if she can come over some time soon”

“Thanks…”

“You know you can always ring her” Tony said. “I know you’ve got her number. And I know you’ve done it in the past”

“Yeah, I know. But sometimes it’s nicer talking to her in person” Peter said. “…I like Li Allen”

“Me too” Tony said. “She’s been brilliant all the time we’ve known her. What a woman”

Peter looked at him. “Do you fancy her?”

“What?” Tony burst out laughing. “Nice one, kid. No, I don’t fancy her. Come on! You’re almost as bad as the papers”

“Sorry…”

“Don’t be” Tony said. “Well anyway, I think it might be best if we kept you inside for a few days”

Peter pouted.

“Don’t give me that look! It’s for the best”

Tony focused on the road. He knew he’d get another ‘you can’t keep the poor thing cooped up all the time’ lecture from Loki, but he also knew it was the right thing to do: He had to keep Peter safe.

-

Loki confronted Tony when he got home. Tony looked at him warily.

“…What?”

“Please tell me you didn’t _actually_ punch a reporter today”

“Well. Not _physically_ ”

“Tony, just give me a straight answer!”

“No, I didn’t punch anyone! Why would I?!”

“Because you were angry?” Loki suggested. “You’re all over social media already. Jo Jo sent me some links”

“I’m not in the habit of punching people when I haven’t got my suit on” Tony said. “Especially not in front of the kid”

Loki looked at Peter. “There’s some apple juice in the fridge”

Peter took the hint and went off to the kitchen. He didn’t want to get in the middle of that kind of dispute anyway.

-

Loki and Tony had a spat, and then went their separate ways to cool off. Tony went to find Loki late that afternoon. 

“Hi” 

Loki looked up from his book. “Hi”

“Where’s the kid?”

“Having a bath” Loki said. “If you listen carefully, you can hear the musical stylings of Peter Parker-John”

“What?” Tony listened hard. “I can’t hear anything”

“Mm, well, your ears aren’t as good as mine”

“Yeah… Oh” Tony said. “…Is he alright?”

“Well, if you go and listen outside his room and hear what he’s singing, you’ll find the answer”

Tony blinked at him. “Right. Well. Maybe I will”

“Then do” Loki said, looking back at his book. “We both know you’re his favourite”

-

Tony knew what Loki meant when he got to Peter’s room. He sighed and knocked on the en suite door. Peter fell silent.

“Peter, is the door unlocked?”

“Yeah”

Tony pushed the door open. “Hey, kiddo”

“Hey” Peter reached across and turned the stereo down.

“What are you listening to?” Tony asked, grabbing the folding chair and sitting down.

“…It’s from Peachtree Road”

“Oh right” Tony said, as though he knew what Peter was talking about. “…Are you alright?”

Peter shrugged.

“Hey, don’t go shutting me out, chick. What’s up?”

“I don’t know. I guess today just kinda threw me off a bit” he said. “…I don’t feel too great, actually. It’s been one of those days”

“One of those _weeks_ , I think. Maybe even one of those months” Tony sighed, resting a hand on Peter’s head. 

Peter didn’t move, or say anything. They were both quiet for a moment or two, listening to the stereo. Tony knew what Loki meant now.

“Do you want me to leave you to it?”

Peter nodded, pulling away from him. “I’ll come and find you later if you want. I think I might go to sleep for a bit when I’ve had my bath”

“Good idea… I’ll see you in a bit”

-

Tony made Loki jump when he stormed into the living room. 

“I’m cancelling the paparazzi”

“Ok” Loki said. “Wait, what?”

“I’m cancelling them. Cancelled, finished, done with, I hate them. I’m getting rid of them”

“I think you’re being a little bit too ambitious, darling”

“Whatever, I’m not having it! How _dare_ they upset my little boy like that?! How _dare_ they? I won’t stand for this any longer! We both know there’s one surefire way to get them off our backs”

Loki looked at him. There was a small silence.

“Oh” he said. “I see”

“I see indeed!” Tony said, taking his mobile phone out of his pocket. “I’ve gotta make some calls”

-

Peter sat down next to Loki late that evening. There was silence for a while, but Loki could sense himself being watched, and it was off-putting.

“What?”

“Is dad angry with me?”

Loki lowered his book. “Why would you say that?”

Peter shrugged. “He’s been all weird. Like, I said I’d find him after my bath and sleep, and I did, but he just said he was busy, and he was all quiet at tea, and then he went down to the lab and told me to go and amuse myself when I tried to follow him”

“I think he’s just a little stressed” Loki said. “I wouldn’t take it personally. Give him a little space. He’s not angry with you, I assure you”

“…Are _you_ angry with me?”

“No. Why would I be?”

Peter shrugged. “I guess I’m just feeling a bit paranoid or mixed up or something”

Loki sighed. He set his book aside and put an arm round Peter’s shoulders. Peter leant into him.

“There now. You’re too young to worry this much. Go and have some fun. Why don’t you sneak out your bedroom window and come back drunk off WKD?”

Peter looked at him, a little shocked. “I don’t think dad would be happy about you encouraging underage drinking”

Loki laughed. “That’s just what the kids your age do, isn’t it? The ones at the Home in Scotland do. Did. My point is; act your age. Try to enjoy yourself. Let me read. Ok?”

Peter nodded slowly and slipped off the window seat. He got the message.

-

Peter did a little search of the house, even though deep down he knew there wasn’t a drop of alcohol in the place. Even the mouthwash and hand gel were alcohol free nowadays. His parents involvement with the AA wasn’t exactly a secret, and although he’d never been given the full facts, he’d overheard a few conversations when he was living with Thor, so he had a pretty good grasp of the situation. 

Still, maybe it was just as well: Peter had had a few run-ins with alcohol in the past, and they hadn’t all ended especially well. But, that did leave him at a bit of a loss of what to do. Not being one himself, he wasn’t really sure what normal fifteen year olds did. He didn’t believe the way fifteen year olds were portrayed on the television, and he wasn’t sure he had the best example of teenagers in his real life now either. 

He could think back, of course, but the Midtown lot weren’t exactly typical either: there was Ned, who was essentially just a gamer, there was Flash, who was essentially a twat, and there was MJ, who was essentially just strange… There weren’t many other people who could remember very well.  
The St Hendrick’s lot weren’t typical either. Most of them acted the way you’d expect a toff to act. But there was Macy, who was essentially a bitch, and perhaps a bit of a class rebel, and there was Malaki, who spent most of his time in a teachers office being shouted at. So not exactly a good indication of what he could do - unless he maybe wanted to get arrested. 

Hm, that was a thought. Peter knew exactly what he’d do if he wanted to get arrested, and it mainly consisted of stealing Loki’s motorbike and driving through a shopping centre before flipping over the handlebars when he reached the escalator. Not exactly the crime of the century, sure - but effective, he supposed.

-

Peter wandered into the living room. Truth be told, it wasn’t a room he often had to himself. Not properly, anyway. But now, Loki was busy reading (nothing new, but he had explicitly asked to be left alone), and Tony was busy down in the lab (ditto Loki’s request). So as far as Peter was concerned, he may as well have the house to himself. 

He picked up the remote, but decided he wasn’t in the mood for television, and set it aside. Instead, he turned on the stereo and loaded his playlist. Listening to music sounded like a better idea. Despite listening and singing for a while the previous day, it felt like he hadn’t listened to music properly for weeks. Generally, no one minded how loud he played his music, and they’d never complained about his singing. And besides, it was a good outlet…

-

Something had certainly thrown the household off-kilter, because Peter found himself waking up on the sofa on Friday morning - something that would never happen when things were going well.

He hauled himself up from the sofa, listening hard. The house was silent. Strange, considering the time, but he supposed his parents were still asleep. He went to the kitchen and fixed himself something to eat. He sat at the little table, scrolling on his phone while he had his breakfast, and rather enjoying the peace and quiet. He felt ok. Better than ok. Good, even. He only wished the kitchen had windows so that he had the morning sun shining in on him, like he always did back at the flat, but he knew it couldn’t be helped. Other than that, he couldn’t complain. Even knowing he was grounded wasn’t off-putting: given the circumstances, a day indoors sounded like a fine idea.

*


	6. Aggravation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Btw sorry it takes me so long to update nowadays.  
> I only work part time but my job is essentially rubbish, and boring as fuck, so I use little brain power while I'm there, and on top of that, I'm still ill, in constant pain, and I have very little money, so you can imagine the kind of stress I'm under.  
> Still, thanks for anyone who's still reading!

-

Peter didn’t have long to enjoy the calm and quiet before his parents woke up and steadily the house seemed to come to life. Soon, Tony came into the kitchen.

“Have you finished that drink?”

“Nearly” Peter said. “Why?”

“When you’ve finished it, don’t get another one, or anything to eat. Ok?”

“Um… Ok?”

“Good boy” Tony nodded, opening the fridge. “You need to get dressed today”

“I… Wasn’t going to _not_ get dressed”

“Mm” Tony said, clearly not listening.

Peter sighed and downed the rest of his drink. There goes the peace, he thought.

-

Peter went out of his way to keep his distance from Tony, which wasn’t too difficult, given the size of the house. After about an hour, he heard Tony calling his name, but he chose not to take any notice. 

Unfortunately, Loki always knew how to find him, and he weaselled him out within minutes.

“Your father’s been calling you” Loki said. “Didn’t you hear?”

“…No”

“Yes you did. Come on now”

Peter whined and stayed where he was.

“Loki? Have you found him?!” Tony shouted, soon appearing in the doorway. “Oh, you’re there! Did you have your headphones on? Whatever; get your shoes on”

“Why?”

“Just do as you’re told, chick” Tony said firmly. 

“But _why_?!”

“Because I said so!”

“That’s not a good enough answer!”

“For gods sake, Peter! Just do as you’re told!”

“BUT _WHY_?!”

“Peter, stop shouting” Loki snapped. “Go and get your shoes on. Now”

Peter sighed in an exaggerated fashion and stormed off. So much for a quiet day at home.

-

Tony grabbed Loki while he was waiting for Peter.

“He’s ok, right?”

“Yes, he’s fine” Loki said. “Why?”

“I don’t need to overshare with him, right? We’ll just get it done, and then I’ll like, I don’t know… Treat him or something?”

“Tony, you’re overthinking this. You made the decision alone; you can execute it alone” Loki said, not quite hiding his disapproval. “Look, I really do need to get going”

“You said you weren’t going to work this week”

“I know, but I’m needed today. We’ll talk later, ok? I love you”

“I love you too…”

Loki kissed him, and Tony kissed him back, although he still seemed worried.

“Don’t look so scared, darling” Loki said. “I’m sure it’ll be fine. I’ll be back this evening”

-

Peter got ready to go out, but when they got down to the garage, he held onto the banister and refused to get into the car.

“Peter, stop being silly: we’re going to be late” Tony said. “Do you want me to get your dad?”

“Just tell me where we’re going and I’ll get in the car”

Tony sighed heavily. “Just get in the car”

“JUST TELL ME WHERE WE’RE GOING THEN!”

“PETER! DON’T SHOUT!” Tony shouted. “We’ve got a doctors appointment. Happy now?”

Peter paused. “Ok. I don’t see why you had to refuse to tell me for so long”

“Just get in the car, Peter”

-

Peter watched Tony closely in the car. He seemed a little tense, but he wasn’t giving anything away. Peter assumed he was due for a blood test or something - he couldn’t see any other reason Tony would try to put off telling him - but even then, it wasn’t something he’d ever done before. But then again, Tony _had_ been acting pretty weird lately, so who was he to judge? He just hoped it wouldn’t take too long: he wanted to go home.

-

The other patients in the waiting room weren’t exactly subtle. Peter hated the feeling of being watched, and he hated overhearing snippets of whispered conversations and mutterings about him and his family. He glared at them as he sat down. Tony sat beside him and put an arm tight round him, almost as though he were restraining him.

“Just ignore them” he murmured. “We don’t need to give anyone anything to react to”

Peter didn’t say anything. He leant into Tony and looked at the floor, following the swirling pattern with his eyes. At least being at the doctors demanded some kind of privacy, even if they _were_ celebrities. Even so, he really wished he was somewhere - anywhere - other than here. 

It wasn’t long before their names were called and they could leave the waiting room.

“How are you?” Dr Manning asked.

“I’m alright, thanks. As much as I can be under the circumstances. And you?” Tony said.

“I can’t complain. And how are you, young man?”

Peter didn’t say anything; just followed them into the office. 

“Thanks for fitting us in at such short notice” Tony said, taking a seat. “How are you doing it? Are you doing blood?”

Dr Manning shook his head. “No, no, blood isn’t necessary. There’s other just as good ways - maybe even better ways - to do it”

“Oh good. You know this one hates needles” he nodded towards Peter. “And to be honest, I’m not a huge fan either”

“I don’t think anyone is” Dr Manning said, organising some items laid out on his desk. He picked up one of the sticks, which had what looked like corrugated foam at the end. “When did you two last eat?”

“I had something about three hours ago” Tony said. “I’ve made sure this one hasn’t had anything for a while either. About an hour and a half ago, maybe more?”

“Good. Good, thank you for heeding my advice” the doctor said. “Now, shall we do you first?”

Peter looked between the two grown-ups, trying to work out what was going on. He’d started to feel a little funny; a bit sick and hollow, and nervous. He didn’t know what he was doing here.

Dr Manning was leaning against his desk now, standing in front of Peter, and Tony, who had just said he’d go first - whatever that meant. Peter tried to make eye contact to question them, but neither men were looking at him. Peter watched, a little taken aback, as Tony opened his mouth. It was only when Dr Manning put the stick into his mouth that Peter twigged that it was a swab - and he suddenly knew why. 

His heart started to thump in his chest, and he felt sick. He couldn’t take his eyes off what was happening, but he hated it all the same. What was going on? This was a dream, surely? Tony had been so insistent, so clear that he was against this… So what had changed? What had he missed?

Peter waited, and all too soon the fourth swab was finished and packed, and all eyes turned to him. Tony refused eye contact. Dr Manning smiled.

“Alright, kiddo” he said. “Your turn”

“No”

Tony and Dr Manning looked at each other. Tony looked at Peter.

“What do you mean; no?”

“You didn’t tell me this was why we were coming! You didn’t say anything _about_ this!” Peter said, outraged. “It’s not fair! You haven’t got any right to do this!”

“Peter, you can cope with having a few swabs in your mouth” Tony said. “It’s not a big deal, and you’re still just a kid: I can make medical decisions on your behalf, and you can’t back out of this one”

“Isn’t it technically a matter of science, not medicine?”

“Don’t be pedantic, Peter” Tony sighed. “Come on, kiddo; don’t be difficult”

“I’m not _being_ difficult: I’m being perfectly reasonable! You should’ve _told_ me about this, or at least ran it by me!” 

At first Peter hadn’t been so bothered about this prospect, but then he’d changed his mind, and now that he was being backed into a corner by it, it was the last thing in the world that he wanted.

“But _why_?! You always said never to give in to the press, and that’s what you’re doing! You said it didn’t matter!”

“I said a lot of things” Tony said. “But I’ve made a decision. I’m doing this for you, sweetheart”

“No you’re not!”

“Yes, I am! I’m doing it so I can get the press off our backs - yours, most importantly. They’re not gonna leave us alone until something else blows up, or they’ve got the proof they want - and ‘something else’ is taking too long. So we’re giving them proof that you’re not my biological son. Ok?”

“No, it’s not ok!”

Tony sighed. “If it doesn’t matter, why make such a fuss over the test?”

“It’s a matter of principal!”

Tony laughed slightly. “Peter, come on now”

“Perhaps” Dr Manning said. “Perhaps you should have told him before bringing him here”

“Exactly!” Peter nodded. “ _Thank_ you”

“Peter, no one is going to hold you down and force your mouth open. If you don’t want to do this, I certainly won’t make you. But try to understand where your father’s coming from”

“I _do_ understand where he’s coming from! I just think it was wrong of him to force it on me like this”

“Sweetheart” Tony took hold of Peter’s hand. “I’m sorry. I really am. But I really need you to let me do this. It’s my job to look after you, and protecting you from the press is part of my job description. This is the only way to get them off our backs. Please, it’ll only take a few minutes”

Peter looked at the swabs lying on the doctors desk. He looked at his and his father’s hands. He didn’t feel sure about this, and he didn’t like it, not one bit. But he also had a feeling that even if he was technically being given a choice, he only really had one option.

So he nodded, and he saw Tony sigh with relief.

“Thank you”

Peter never especially liked Dr Manning touching him, but somehow this felt worse than ever. He didn’t like being so close either, and not knowing where to look. He finally settled on the clock, watching the seconds tick by painfully slowly. Four minutes had never felt like such a long time. 

-

Tony stopped when they reached the car, and put a hand on Peter’s shoulder to stop him. Peter made himself look at him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, kiddo. I really am. Honestly”

Peter nodded slightly.

“…Thank you” Tony said. “Thank you for doing it anyway. I know it’s not very comfortable”

Tony rested a hand on Peter’s cheek, brushed his hair back from his face, and then pulled him close and hugged him tight.

“I really am doing it for you, kiddo. I can’t stand the way the press have been treating you and making you feel. In a few days, we’ll get the results, and then we can put this whole thing to rest. Ok?”

Peter snuggled into Tony’s chest. He still felt a bit funny, but he was starting to feel better. He liked the feeling of Tony’s hand on his head, and he knew where he was coming from. Besides, Tony had _always_ looked out for him. Why would now be any different?

“Alright then” Tony stepped back and cleared his throat. “Get in”

Peter did as he was told, and when Tony started the car, he spoke.

“Um, dad?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m kinda hungry”

“Yeah?” Tony said. “Well, let’s get you fed, then!”

“Ok. What do we have in? I kinda fancy something hot”

“Why bother cooking? We could always eat out”

“Oh! Really? Um…” Peter thought for a moment. “What about daddy?”

“He’s gone to the hospital, remember?”

“Has he?”

“Uh, yeah!” Tony laughed slightly. “I guess you didn’t hear that bit of conversation then. He’ll be back this evening. He won’t know, mind, or care if we eat without him. So, what do you fancy?”

“I don’t really know. What about you?”

“I don’t really know either” Tony said. “Hey, how about we just find somewhere different, like, one of the places you used to go with May? Or somewhere we’ve never been before? What do you say?”

“Well… That could be interesting, I guess” Peter said. “It could be good?”

“Yeah, it could be good! Let’s do that then!” 

Tony seemed so enthusiastic about the idea that Peter couldn’t really shoot it down. Besides, sometimes it was good to try something new.

“Well, you can pick the restaurant” Peter said, fiddling with the car stereo. “And I’ll choose the soundtrack”

There was a short silence before music filled the car.

Tony laughed slightly and ruffled the boys hair. “You’re definitely your father’s son, you know”

Peter just shrugged. He knew.

-

Peter had a sneaking suspicion he’d overestimated his stomach when ordering. He had a feeling Tony had too.

“Well, my father always said my eyes were bigger than my belly” Tony said, putting his fork down. “It was his way of calling me a greedy bastard, I think”

“Oh right” Peter said awkwardly. “You never talk about him, you know”

“Why would I?”

“Well… he was your dad. So… that makes him my granddad… It’d be good to know a bit about him”

“Look on Wikipedia then”

Peter pouted, but he didn’t push it. Neither of his parents spoke about their parents. Sometimes he didn’t mind, but sometimes he did. Especially when his friends started talking about their grandparents and he had nothing to contribute to the conversation. 

“So” Tony said. “Do you think you can manage a pudding after all those buffalo cauliflower whatsits and onion rings and chicken and stuff?”

“You bet!” Peter said, grateful for the break in tension. “What about you?”

“Maybe something small. Depends what they’ve got”

“They had some great looking stuff! I might want _two_ puddings” Peter said, snatching a dessert menu out of the stand. “Good job we have separate stomachs for sweet things, right?”

Tony chuckled. “Your whale’s gonna have to retire from singing at this rate! You’ll burst if you eat too much more. Or at the very least throw up”

“Yeah, maybe, but it’ll be worth it”

“Mm, well I don’t want you making a mess of the upholstery, so don’t go overboard”

“…Red velvet and white chocolate cheesecake” Peter said. “I’ve made a decision”

“Mm. Well, I’m just gonna have a coffee…”

“What kind?” Peter asked, looking at the list, and especially at the liqueur coffee offer at the bottom of the page.

Tony hesitated. “…Just a latte. I’ve already eaten too much. I’ll finish off your cheesecake when you give up half way through”

“Ha! There’s not a dessert on the planet that can beat me!”

He was wrong, of course, and gave up a little over halfway through his pudding - but he told Tony that he left it on purpose, because it didn’t seem fair for only one of them to get a pudding. So Tony finished it off for him, and then they both sat back, feeling too full to even move.

“…It’s been a pretty long time since just the two of us did this” Tony said. “It’s good to spend a bit of time with you”

“Yeah… Hey, since we’re too full to start a fight, can I ask you something?”

“That sounds ominous” Tony said. “What is it?”

“Are you taking me out of St Hendricks?”

Tony stopped for a minute. “…What makes you think that?”

“I overheard you and daddy talking about homeschooling”

“Ah. Uh…” Tony set his mug down. “How would you feel if we did?”

Peter shrugged. “I don’t know. If you did it right now, I don’t think I’d care. I’m not exactly getting on with the people there right now”

“I see”

“So, are you taking me out of school?”

“We’re not sure yet. We’re still thinking about it. Although not so much right now, because we’ve got a whole bunch of stuff to sort out. Like all this stuff with the press… You know you’re not allowed to tell anyone about what we did today, right?”

“Who am I gonna tell?” Peter said, shrugging. “I’m not gonna go shouting about it. I think you know that. Or at least you _should_ , considering how long you’ve known me”

“Yeah” Tony checked his watch. “Hey, we should be heading back: I’ve got a conference call in an hour. You can amuse yourself for a bit, can’t you?”

Peter nodded.

“Good. Right, come on then”

Peter did as he was told, but as they were walking to the car, he realised that the meal they’d just had was much better in theory than in practice. He’d thought he’d come out of there feeling healed and warm and happy, but he didn’t. He didn’t like his father very much right now, and he wasn’t afraid to admit that to himself. Maybe he’d go to sleep for a bit when he got home. He just hoped that afterwards, he’d feel ok again.

-

Peter sat looking in Loki’s room, looking at the big picture on the wall by the door. It was old now, evident by the fact it was all three of them with May. Things had been much simpler back then, Peter was sure of it. He loved his parents, but he still felt he’d swap his current life to get May back. Sure, some things were better now (well, quite a lot of things), but he’d been happy back in the days where he was only in this giant house two or three nights a week, and he resided in the scrubby old flat in Queens with May, and he was friends with Ned, and he mastered a double - almost triple - life, and he was out as Spiderman every single night. 

He couldn’t help feeling melancholy when he thought about that. Nowadays, he probably went out as Spiderman once or twice a week, if that. Some weeks he didn’t go at all. There were times where he’d go out every night for a week or so, but it wasn’t a constant thing. It wasn’t that he’d lost interest, or that it had lost its meaning: it was just that he didn’t always have the motivation, and somehow life kept getting in the way. Besides, it had started to feel different, mainly because he kept comparing it to the old times in Queens. Spiderman was still well known, but Peter had long since stopped being excited whenever his alter-ego turned up in the papers. At least no one knew it was him. Well, aside from his parents. And the Avengers. And Ned… But none of those were likely to spill his secret, and he knew that. Sometimes he felt like he wouldn’t care if people knew - but he also felt like his parents would mind very much. It was a tricky one.

-

Peter eventually slipped off Loki’s bed and went to his own room. He paused, looking at the locket hanging beside his sink. He liked having it there (although he did often forget about it), but sometimes it just reminded him of the “arrangement” Loki and Tony and May had had. He’d stopped feeling bitter about that a long time ago, but he still didn’t like thinking about it. Especially now. Because if he thought about it too much, he almost started to believe what the papers were saying. And even when he didn’t believe them, he completely understood where the reporters were coming from.

After all, what other conclusion would anyone pull from a man who had spent most of his adult life being a self-proclaimed Playboy? Who knew how many people his father had slept with? That was another thing Peter didn’t like thinking about. Sometimes, when Tony talked about Peter being his heir; his successor, he couldn’t help thinking that maybe - just maybe - he was fated to follow a little too closely in his father’s footsteps.

And as much as Peter loved him, he was grateful he was only adopted. Because, (as much as he’d never admit it out loud) he didn’t want to grow up to be anything like Tony Stark.

*


	7. Kicks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tiny chapter this time, sorry. Next one will be longer

-

Loki returned home to an unusually quiet house, but for once he didn’t give it a second thought. He went to his room and closed the door, only to be disturbed a moment later.

“Hey, baby”

“Hi. I didn’t realise you were about” he said. “Shut the door”

Tony did as he was asked. 

“So” he said. “Are you ok?”

“Mm. It’s just been a tough day”

“Oh dear” Tony said, approaching the bed. “Did… did something happen?”

“Not exactly” Loki said, pulling his shirt off and tossing it aside. “It’s just my back and shoulders playing up again. It’s been rather bad today”

“Aw, darling” Tony sighed, climbing onto the bed and kneeling behind him.

“Tony, what are you doing?” Loki sighed.

“Rubbing your shoulders” he mumbled. “Jesus, Loki! You’ve got some mega knots here. No wonder it hurts”

“Mm” Loki sucked his breath. “You’re hurting me”

“You’ll feel better for it, I promise”

“Mm… How did it go at the doctors?”

“Peter kicked off a little bit” 

“I told you you should have told him before the appointment”

“Well, maybe” Tony sighed. “Well, we did it, anyway. Should get the results within the next three to five days, apparently. Dr Manning said he’d try to rush it through, but he can’t promise”

“I see” 

“I think he’s sulking now” Tony said. “He’s been in his room since we got back. We had a good meal out, mind you”

“When did you last check on him?”

“Uhh… I haven’t”

“Mm. Maybe I’ll go and see how he is” Loki said, standing up.

Tony sighed. “Aww, Loki, do you have to? Can’t we just spend a bit of time together?”

“Later”

-

Peter paused his music when the door opened. He didn’t protest when Loki sat down on the bed and pulled him onto his lap.

“Hello, tiny”

Peter didn’t say anything. He rested against Loki’s chest, listening to the sound of his heart beating.

“You’re very quiet” Loki said after a few minutes. “Don’t you have anything to say?”

Peter shrugged. Loki waited a moment, and then picked up the remote on the bed.

“Well, no use sitting in total silence” he said, hitting the play button. He was quiet for a moment. “I wish I could say I was surprised at your music choice”

Peter didn’t know how to respond to that, so he didn’t. Loki put a finger under Peter’s chin, tipping his head back so he had to look at him.

“You’re really not very happy right now, are you?”

For a moment, Peter looked into his father’s eyes, but then pulled away and rested his ear back against his chest. Loki sighed and held him tighter.

“You are allowed to talk to me, you know. You’re allowed to tell me what’s wrong”

Peter shook his head slightly.

“…Is it because of what happened at the doctors?”

Peter paused, and then shrugged one shoulder. Loki sighed again.

“What’s going on in that head of yours, sweetie?”

Too much, Peter thought. Definitely too much to explain, at any rate.

“You’re not going to speak to me, are you?”

Peter shook his head slightly. 

“Do you want me to leave you alone?”

Peter didn’t even twitch. Loki looked at him, sighing once more, and carefully lifted Peter off his lap and set him back on the bed.

“Well, I’ll leave you to your music and thoughts” he said, standing up. “You just come and find me if you change your mind”

He kissed him on the cheek and left him to it.

-

Tony was still on Loki’s bed, and he smiled when his husband returned.

“So, about that alone time-”

“I’m not in the mood” Loki said. “I’m going to have a bath”

“Oooh!”

“On my own, Anthony”

Tony was a little taken aback by his tone. 

“What have _I_ done?”

“Tony, just give me a break” Loki sighed. “I’m tired, and I’m sore, and-”

“I offered to give you a massage” Tony interrupted.

Loki rested his head on his fingertips for a moment. “Half an hour. Just give me half an hour to myself. We’ll talk later”

“…I take it we’re not having some bedroom fun tonight then?”

Loki simply slammed the en suite door behind him.

-

Loki gave in after his bath, lying on his front on the bed and letting Tony rub his back and shoulders. It hurt horribly at first, but after a while he started to feel the benefit.

“How did Peter seem to you today?”

“Hm? Oh, he was fine” Tony said. “We had a great time at lunch, just like old times, yknow? He was laughing and joking and chatting like always”

“Mm. And what about when you got home?”

“Uh, well, I had a conference call pretty soon after we got back. I told him he could come and get me if he really needed to, but I sent him off to his room while I went down to the lab and I guess he didn’t need me cos he didn’t come to find me. He was fine. Seemed a bit tired, I guess. But you know, we had a pretty big meal”

“Mm”

“…Why?”

“He didn’t say a word when I went in to see him, and he wasn’t especially responsive” Loki said. “I think he’s sad, Tony”

“I think you’re reading into it a bit too much” Tony said. “He’s probably just got indigestion or something. Don’t act so worried. We’re friends just as much as ever”

Loki stayed quiet. He didn’t want to believe he might be wrong, but after a tiring afternoon at work, coupled with a bit of a chronic pain flare-up, there was always a chance. Besides, how could he compare his five minutes with the boy to Tony’s full day? Maybe he just needed to rest now, and draw conclusions later.

-

Peter didn’t say anything when Tony got him to help tidy the games room. He didn’t say anything at teatime. He didn’t say anything after tea when they settled in the living room either. 

“You wanna watch a DVD or something, fella?” Tony said.

Peter shrugged. 

“What’s gotten into you tonight? Are you being defiant? I don’t think I like your attitude”

“You don’t like him being quiet?” Loki said, raising an eyebrow.

“This isn’t quiet; it’s silent” Tony said. “What’s up, kiddo? Are you protesting?”

Peter scowled at him.

“Hey, don’t go giving me that look!”

“Oh Tony, leave the boy alone” Loki sighed. I don’t think he needs you lecturing him”

“I’m not! Peter, you can either answer me properly or go to your room”

“Tony! You can’t say that! No, Peter, you stay right where you are! Dad’s just being foolish” Loki said, shaking his head at Tony. “You can’t force him to talk if he doesn’t want to”

“Well maybe I want everyone in the room to contribute to the conversation”

“ _What_ conversation? I’m hardly getting involved either, am I?” Loki said, raising his book. “Honestly”

“Well I stand by what I said”

“Tony, remember that time you threatened to spank him if he didn’t break his record at that swim contest? This is almost as out of order as that”

“Oh come on! That was a joke!” Tony protested.

“It didn’t sound like it at the time”

“Yeah? Well I-”

Peter looked back and forth between his parents. Even though it rarely led to anything more, he never liked it when they bickered. Especially about him.

“Hey, don’t you go kicking off at me!” Tony said.

“Oh darling, please. I’ve done more than my fair share of kicking off in my life, and this isn’t it. I think you know that”

“WELL, what I DO know is-”

Peter carefully got up and slipped out of the room. He wasn’t going to stick around and let the argument get turned on him. 

-

Loki and Tony did have an argument, and quite a bad one too. Peter knew it was worse than usual when he heard the front door slam. He didn’t need three guesses to know which parent had stormed out. 

*


	8. Yellow, Blue, Green and Grey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long to post! It's longer than the previous chapter, and I hope you enjoy it! Please leave me a comment if you have a minute. Thank you!

-

Peter fully expected a difficult few days to follow, but then he was woken up by the sound of his parents… being active… in the next room. He couldn’t help feeling just a little bit relieved. But more than that, he was grateful that he kept his earphones so close to his bed.

-

Things seemed to go back to normal for a few days. Being technically grounded, Peter stayed in, and somehow, by watching DVDs, staying off the internet, and spending a lot of time taking advantage of everything the house had to offer, he managed to completely ignore the papers and news stories still circulating about him and his family. He tried to keep himself busy, because otherwise he’d get bored and start doing strange things, which would often get him into trouble.

-

Peter spent Monday morning down in the challenge area of the pool. It seemed to change every time he went down there, and it was a great way to kill a few hours. It was easy to get really into it, so it was really quite a shock when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Hey, hey, stop screaming! It’s only me!”

“You can’t just sneak up on me like that!” Peter shouted. “I nearly wet myself!”

“Well, it’s the best place to do it: no one would be able to tell” Tony grinned. 

Peter scowled and splashed him. He sat down heavily on the rock ledge, paddling his feet in the water.

“My hearts still thumping”

Tony sat down beside him. “I didn’t mean to scare you. I didn’t realise how hard you were concentrating”

“It’s weird seeing you down here. Especially actually _in_ the pool, and not just on the side shouting at me”

“Aw, that’s not fair!”

“It is! You always put on that nasty coach persona and get me to do lengths and stuff, and then we always end up in an argument and usually daddy has to come down and sort everything out”

“Well, ok, maybe that’s true” Tony admitted. “…Hey, if we do decide to homeschool you, we can find you a swim team nearby. They’re not all school-based, you know: I’ve checked”

“Yeah… I don’t even like the swim team I’m a part of now” Peter said awkwardly, looking down at his hands. “I wouldn’t worry about it…”

“You’re gifted, kiddo” Tony said. “You’ve got more medals and trophies than anyone else at your school - and probably most schools. You could go professional. Olympic Swimmer Peter Stark, eh?”

Peter shook his head. Tony sighed. 

“…Why did you come down here, dad?”

“Oh. I had a phone call from Dr Manning”

“Oh right. So you’ve been excluded, then?”

“No, he didn’t tell me the results - although obviously we know what they are - he just said he wants us to go in and talk to him, the whole family”

“What? Why?”

“He didn’t say”

Peter was quiet for a moment. “…What if they found something while they were doing the test, dad? What if I’ve got some weird marker that puts me at higher risk of developing some physiological condition or some illness or something, like, what if there’s something in my family history that means I’m gonna get really ill or something?!”

“Hey, hey, don’t act so worried!” Tony put his arms round Peter, hugging him close. “If there was anything nasty in your family history, you’d know about it. Shhh! Oh sweetheart, don’t cry!”

“I’m not crying!”

“What’s this then?” Tony said, dabbing at the tears on Peter’s cheek.

“Nothing…” Peter mumbled.

“Sweetheart, it’s ok” Tony said, kissing him firmly on the nose. “I’m sure it’s nothing like that. Like I said, you’d know if you were at risk of something because of your bloodline. I would too… There’s nothing in my bloodline, by the way, so don’t go worrying about that either. No, Dr Manning probably just prefers giving results face to face”

“But why has he said daddy has to go too?”

“Emotional support? I don’t know. Even though we know what the result is gonna be, it’s still a bit nerve-wracking going to the doctors. It’s not really somewhere you go for fun, is it?”

Peter shook his head slightly. “I get all nervous about it even when I know I’m going for a blood test or something simple. Or when I go to the dentist… Daddy’s good at staying calm in those situations though, isn’t he?”

“Yeah, he is” Tony said. “You know, I think he likes it. Even before he started at the hospital, he never seemed bothered by medical environments - quite the opposite, in fact”

“Maybe it makes him feel safe” Peter suggested. “Like, yknow, everyone being there to look after you or whatever”

“I think you’re probably right. We had some weird days early on where he was in a really bad mood, like, cross or upset or whatever, and he’d completely mellow out as soon as he was in the doctors office. He’s a strange one, your father”

“I think I’m ok with strange”

“Good, because you’re strange too. And so am I” Tony kissed his nose again. “I think we need to get out of the pool now. Go and have a shower and get dressed and get something to eat before we go out. Ok?”

“Mm… I don’t suppose I’ve got a choice, have I?”

“‘fraid not, kiddo. Come on; let’s go up the big slide and have a grand finale, ok?”

“Ok. But we can’t get to it from here, can we?”

“Sure we can! We just need to do that little puzzle first”

Peter looked back at the puzzle he’d been working on. “But that just leads to the caves, and they only lead to the fairy pool”

“That’s what you think! Jesus, Peter, I thought you’d’ve explored every nook and cranny of this place by now. Right, budge up: I’ll do this puzzle for you and then I’ll show you how to get to the big slide from the caves”

Peter watched Tony. He finished the puzzle in a matter of moments, and the hidden door in the wall opened.

“Are you sure you’re right about this?” Peter asked. “I mean, what if you’ve remembered wrong? You never really come down here”

“I designed this whole thing, remember? I know what I’m doing. Now go on”

Peter did as he was told. Tony followed after, and the hole closed behind them. Peter sat for a moment on the damp stone, looking at the uneven ceiling and the water dripping down the wall, all illuminated by the dim fairy lights dotted about. If he was quiet, he could hear the distant gentle harp music playing. 

“…I like this bit” Peter said. “It’s good to come here and think. I fell asleep down here once”

“Really?”

“Yeah. It was a long time ago, back when May was still alive. It was one of my weekends here. You were down in the front pool for a bit but then you had to go out, and daddy Loki was upstairs and I was tired when I reached this bit and just kinda sat down and fell asleep” Peter remembered. “I don’t know how long I was asleep for, but it was long enough to make daddy worried. He looked pretty scared when I went back upstairs after I woke up. He got a bit cross with me”

“Oh dear. What did he say?”

“I don’t really remember. Something about thinking I’d run away and that he was about to call you when I showed up. He didn’t get too angry though” Peter said. “He just tripped me up and said I needed an early night”

Tony laughed slightly. “He was always tripping you up back then. You never really seemed to mind but May went mad when she saw it happen”

“Oh yeah, she was soooo cross! She proper shouted at daddy, didn’t she?”

“She certainly did! He was a little surprised by it. Still, I suppose it had the desired effect. He stopped tripping you pretty soon after that, didn’t he?”

“Well, mostly” Peter said. “I think I had a bit of an argument with her about it cos I felt like she was overreacting. But I guess I can see why she got so angry”

“Yeah. To be honest, I never liked it either. If it had hurt or upset you I’d’ve intervened, but you usually just laughed and jumped up again”

“Yeah… You know, he’s tripped me accidentally a few times, and I’ve been hurt from that. So maybe May wasn’t really overreacting”

“I can imagine how that conversation went down” Tony said, raising an eyebrow. “Right, we can’t really hang about here all day”

Peter pouted. “I like it down here”

“I know, kiddo, but we’ve got places to be”

Peter sighed, but nodded. “Can we come back down here when we get back from the doctors?”

“Sure, I don’t see why not” Tony said. “Let’s go to the slide”

“Right!” 

Peter looked around the cave. He could see the pathway which led to the other caves and the fairy pool, but there was nowhere else they could go.

“Uhh… So we go down there, right?”

“Nope” Tony said. “You can get to it from here”

“How? There’s no openings or puzzles or anything!”

“Is that so? Look at these” Tony tapped a small but thick plastic panel on the ground, illuminated by a pale light under it. 

Peter looked. There was a few of them, leading to the next cave.

“What about them? They’re just showing the path, aren’t they?”

“Nope. Look, all of these ones are yellow, right?”

Peter glanced at them. “Well, aside from that pink one in the middle”

“There you go, that’s your first clue”

Peter furrowed his brow and went over to the pink one. He tapped it cautiously, as though it could make the floor collapse beneath them. 

“…I don’t get what I’m supposed to be doing here”

Tony smiled, moving over to be beside him. He traced the edges of the panel, and then pushed on one side of it. The panel flipped up, revealing a strange key like that of a wind up toy.

“Oh! What..?”

“Give it a twist, then!”

Peter turned the key, and there was a low rumble. Peter looked at the wall behind him. 

“Umm…”

The rumble continued, and as Tony replaced the panel, a square of the wall behind them opened up. 

“Alright, in you get” Tony said.

“What? No way! It’s dark in there”

Tony laughed. “Just go. Be careful though”

Peter took a deep breath, pulled himself up and climbed through the hole - and fell a good couple of feet, landing with a splash in a shallow puddle of water. As he did so, the hole in the wall closed. 

“WAIT, DAD!!”

It was pitch black. Peter could hear the sound of the water, and soon the rumbling he’d heard back in the cave. He put his hands out, trying to figure out where to go, but the ceiling above where he lay was so low he couldn’t even sit up, and his senses were starting to go into overdrive. 

“DAD!!!”

The hole in the wall above opened again, and Tony’s head appeared.

“Hey, kiddo, it’s ok! You’re perfectly safe”

“I don’t _feel_ it! Where am I supposed to go? I can barely move in here and it’s all dark!”

“The low bit is only about half a metre wide, kiddo. You just need to shuffle yourself along and you’ll hit the sensor and the lights will go on in the next bit, ok? There’s a bit of a drop at the end so be ready or that”

“What if they don’t come on?!”

“They will, believe me. Get a move on, kiddo; we haven’t got all day”

Peter still felt unsure.

“Hey, sweetheart, I can’t come down to join you until you move”

Peter’s heart was thumping so hard he could feel it in his throat. 

“I don’t like it. Can’t I come back up?”

“Nope: we’re going forwards, not backwards! This is the quickest way out. Start shuffling, fella. Come on; this is nowhere near as scary as a mission!”

Peter swallowed hard and did as he was told. It was awkward, but as he started moving he realised there was a lot more space than he’d originally thought, and soon a light came on to his right. He still had a little while to go, and the sound of water was getting louder. He squeezed his eyes shut and focused on moving - and let out a little squeak as he slipped down a little slope and landed in a little pool filled with what looked like gold coins. He paddled further in and scooped up a handful. They were almost certainly plastic, but they looked surprisingly real. 

It was a funny little round pool, only about three metres across. It was very warm, and it felt very much like being in a bowl. There were a number of shaped doors in the walls, all with little buttons beside them which Peter presumed opened them. They all had signs above them, but before Peter could read them, Tony slipped into the pool with him.

“Hey, kiddo” Tony sat up and gave him a little cuddle. “Are you alright? You seemed pretty riled back there”

“I was scared”

“You’re perfectly alright. Come on; we want this door here” Tony said, pulling himself up onto a ledge by a door marked ‘To the skies’. 

“What are all these other doors?” Peter asked, looking around. “To the trees, to the seas, to the-”

“Peter, sweetheart, come on”

“Aww, I don’t wanna go to the doctors! Can’t you call him to reschedule while we stay down here and explore?”

Tony laughed. “No, sweetheart. We can come back down here some other time. Come on”

Tony held a hand out, and Peter let himself be helped up onto the ledge. Tony pressed the button to open the door, and inside was a large square slab with a thin gap round the edge.

“Umm…”

“Hey, don’t worry: you can fit three grown men on this thing, so me and you are no problem” Tony said.

“It just looks like a tiny room”

“Oh, ye of little faith” Tony said, climbing through the door and sitting down.

Peter sat close against him and Tony pressed a button inside to close the door. He pressed a button on the slab they were sat on and it started moving upwards. Peter squeaked a little.

“Oh, it’s a lift! I didn’t expect that”

“Yeah, pretty good right?”

“You know, I think this is exactly what having money is all about. This swimming pool is like a whole other world inside our house”

“I’m still pretty damn proud of it. It was horrendously expensive to make, mind you”

“I bet” Peter said. “How much does it cost to maintain?”

“Never you mind!” Tony said. “…Well, actually it’s not expensive. We’ve got the outside people who do a lot of the servicing and extra stuff to it, but it’s fitted with a hell of a lot of things that self-clean and maintain. The company has it all mapped out and they have easy access routes. They get a good wage for it, but it’s not a massive dent at all”

“Oh right. It’s all eco then”

“Pretty much. Plus Loki put some kind of weird spell on it that basically preserves it in this state. I don’t ask too many questions about his magic. There’s no way I’d understand it even if I did”

Peter nodded, and there was a ding as the slab stopped moving. The door here opened automatically. It was smaller than the one at the bottom, so they had to crawl out. Peter stood up when they were both out, surprised to find himself at the top of the big slide, but even more surprised to find that he’d just crawled out of the big metal block with the slide control panel on top. 

“Oh fuck”

“Peter! Don’t swear!”

“Sorry. That’s so weird; I thought it was all just regular machiney stuff there. Wow… Well, it explains why I never noticed there was fourth way up here”

“Well, now you know. Now get yourself down the slide”

“You can go first”

Tony gave him a look. “I’m not sure I trust you not to run back into the caves when I’m halfway down. After you”

“I can’t _believe_ you don’t trust me” Peter said, pretending to be hurt. “Alright, I’ll go first. See you at the bottom”

-

“I always find this a bit surreal” Peter said when Tony splashed into the front pool with him. “This bit is like any other pool. Just by looking, you can’t tell there’s so much going on back there”

“It does feel a bit like returning from another world” Tony said. “I sometimes think we need to use this more. But I guess life gets in the way”

“Yeah…”

“Alright, come on: shower time”

Peter felt pretty exhausted, but happy too, so he didn’t protest. The changing rooms and showers were just like any public swimming pool, which he pointed out.

“Why did you get these showers?” Peter asked, pressing the button again. “When you press the button they only run for about thirty seconds. These have to be the most stressful showers you can have”

Tony laughed. “No, stressful is that shower in the green bathroom that genuinely only has a one millimetre margin between boiling, just right, and freezing”

“Good job no one uses that one then” Peter said. “Hey, that’s my shower gel!”

“Well forgive me for not bringing my own down” Tony smiled. “As for your question, you’re not allowed to complain about these showers: they’re authentic and they do the job”

Peter giggled. “Whatever you say”

After they’d showered they went to get changed.

“Why do you always just put your clothes in a heap down here? Don’t they teach you anything at that expensive school?” Tony sighed. “I put pegs and towel racks down here for a reason, you know”

“Stop fussing. I’ll hang them up next time, ok?”

“You’d better do!” Tony shook his head. “Don’t be too long getting dressed, ok? We need to get you fed before we go”

Peter nodded and sauntered into his favoured cubicle. After that excursion, he was definitely ready for his lunch.

-

Peter had his lunch quite happily, and then promptly fell asleep on the sofa in the living room. 

“Aww, he’s asleep!” Tony said. “I don’t want to wake him up”

“Well, if you fancy trying to get a coat and shoes on a sleeping teenager, and then carrying him down to the car, then that’s your prerogative” Loki said, pulling his own coat and shoes on. “We do need to get going soon”

“Yeah, I know” Tony sat down next to Peter and gave him a little shake.

Peter didn’t seem too annoyed about being woken up. 

“Hey kiddo” Tony said. “You ok?”

“Yeah, I’m ok” Peter said, sitting up properly and rubbing his eyes. “Are we going now?”

“Soon, yeah” Tony said. “You should go and get your shoes and coat”

Peter nodded. “Ok”

“Good boy” Tony kissed him on the cheek. “Go on then. Don’t take too long”

Once Peter was out of the room, Tony noticed that Loki was watching him.

“What?”

“Oh, nothing”

“Don’t you ‘nothing’ me! What is it?”

“I was just watching you together” Loki said. “You’re so cute sometimes”

“Well, what can I say? He’s such a good little kid. I love him”

“I know” Loki smiled. “Any plans for when we get back?”

“Yeah, I think we’re gonna go and mess about in the pool for a bit. Would you believe there’s bits he hasn’t discovered yet? It’ll be fun. And then maybe I’ll get on to Marco about releasing a statement saying that we’ve done a DNA test and proved I’m not the natural father or whatever. I don’t know; depends how long we’re downstairs for” Tony said, wandering off in his thoughts for a moment. “…You could join us?”

“I think I’ll leave you two to it. I think it’s a good idea, especially since you’ve had quite a few arguments lately… It’s good to see you’re back to normal now”

“Mm. Thanks”

“It’s meant as a compliment, darling”

“I know” Tony stood up. “Well! I’m gonna be the one holding all of us up if I don’t go and get my stuff on! Time to get a move on”

-

Loki offered to drive, but Tony said it’d help calm his nerves if he had the road to focus on.

“I don’t get why I’m so nervous” Peter said, lounging in the back seat. “It’s not like we don’t know what Dr Manning’s gonna say”

“I know, chick” Tony said. “I’m mega nervous too! You know how it is, like, when your heart starts going and you feel hot and cold at the same time, and slightly shaky and slightly hollow all over?”

“That’s how I feel too” Peter said.

“It’s probably just because you know it’s a doctors surgery” Loki said calmly. “It’ll be over before you know it”

“I know, but that doesn’t help my nerves now” Peter said.

Tony reached back, squeezing Peter’s knee. “You’re alright, kiddo. You’ve got both of us with you. And like you said; it’s not like we don’t know what to expect”

-

Peter cuddled up close to Tony in the waiting room. Tony held him tight, stroking his hair and kissing his face and talking quietly to him. Loki leant against Tony’s shoulder on the other side and went through his messages while they were waiting to be called in.

“Can we go and get a takeaway after this?” Peter asked.

“Ooh, maybe. Depends if you’re good or not” Tony teased. “What do you fancy?”

“I don’t really know” Peter said. “I just want something hot and greasy and potentially bad for me”

Tony laughed slightly. “Good job we live in America then, fella! We’ll find you something suitably delicious and hot and unhealthy” he lowered his voice slightly. “Something daddy will _totally_ disapprove of!”

“I heard that” Loki said.

Tony and Peter just laughed. A door opened.

“Misters and Master Stark?”

“Oop, that’s us” Tony said, giving Peter a little pat and standing up.

He took a deep breath. Those blasted nerves! Ah well. It would all be over soon.

-

“You know, you could have just given us the results over the phone or through an email” Tony said as they sat down in Dr Manning’s office.

“I thought it best I see you all face to face” Dr Manning said, sitting down behind his desk. “How are you today?”

“Good” Tony said, giving Peter’s hand a squeeze. “Well, we’re all a bit nervous, I think. Appointments always get my nerves going a bit, even when I know what to expect”

Dr Manning looked at the three of them: Peter in the middle, with Loki to his left and Tony to his right. Despite their fairly obvious nerves and the pressure they’d been under lately, they looked very much the picture of a happy family. Just the same as usual.

“Well, you know why you’re here” Dr Manning said, shuffling the papers on his desk. “Of course, a few days ago we took samples for a paternity test, and we’ve had to results back”

“A little sooner than expected, I must say” Loki said.

“Well, it is nearer the minimum day to the maximum, I admit”

“I didn’t realise they’d work over weekends” Loki said.

“Hey, hey, as much as I love the friendly atmosphere, can we not beat about the bush all day?” Tony said, not unkindly. “We all know why we’re here; we know what we did; we know Peter’s not my- uh, flesh and blood - so let’s just look at the proving papers, and then we can get _the_ papers off our backs, ok?”

There was a small silence. Dr Manning picked up a letter and unfolded it. He held it out to Tony.

“You should read this”

Tony smiled slightly and shrugged. He reached forwards and took the paper from him. He cleared his throat and looked at the letter.

_…An analysis of the DNA profiles of Anthony Edward Stark and Peter Benjamin Parker-Stark determines that the alleged father cannot be excluded as the biological father of the tested child.  
Based on the analysis, the probability of paternity is 99.99999999%._

_Conclusion:  
Based on our analysis, it is practically proven that Mr. Anthony Stark is the biological father of the child Peter Parker-Stark…_

As he read, Tony’s face fell. All of a sudden he felt hot, but as though he was breaking out in a cold sweat. He read through the letter again, and then flipped to the next page, looking at the DNA Paternity Test Report, scanning the first row: Mother (Not Tested), Child, Alleged Father; glancing at the numbers, and finding the conclusion at the bottom:

_Statement of Results:  
The alleged father cannot be excluded as the biological father of the tested child. Based on the analysis of STR loci listed above, the probability of paternity is 99.99999999%. In conclusion, the alleged father **IS** the biological father of the tested child._

“Dad?”

Tony slowly raised his head and looked at Peter, almost staring at him, not knowing what to think, what to feel.

“Dad? Are you ok?”

“Tony, what’s the matter?” Loki said, recognising the look on his husbands face.

When Tony looked at him but didn’t say anything, Loki reached across and snatched the letter.

“Well, thanks doc, I’m gonna go and wait outside” Tony gabbled, hoarsely, and he stood up and rushed out of the office.

“Dad!?” 

Peter wanted to run after him, but Loki put a hand out to stop him. Peter looked at Dr Manning, who was a blank-faced as a statue, and then he looked at Loki. Loki read through the letter again.

“Daddy, what is it?” Peter asked desperately, starting to feel seriously strange and shaky inside.

Loki looked at Peter, the expression on his face a toned-down version of the one Tony had had. Loki opened his mouth to speak, but then closed it without a word. Peter glanced at the letter Loki held, which was flipped to the second page. Peter grabbed it, and nobody stopped him from doing so.

He glanced at the table, but focused on the box near the bottom.

… _Based on the analysis of STR loci listed above, the probability of paternity is 99.99999999%. In conclusion, the alleged father **IS** the biological father of the tested child._

Peter turned the page back and read the letter on the front. He looked at it in silence for a minute or two, not sure what to think, what to feel. He slowly set the letter down on Dr Manning’s desk.

“I’m sure you can understand why I wanted to see you all in person” Dr Manning said gently. “I understand this is a shock for you. Tony especially, considering… Well”

“A small part of me would love to dispute this” Loki said slowly. “But I understand how these tests work, and… I think perhaps I’m not so surprised as I should be”

Peter shot him a very uncertain look, but quickly looked away. Even without looking at the letter, he could still see those vital words before his eyes: _The alleged father_ **IS** _the biological father of the tested child._  
His brain didn’t seem to be working properly. How was he supposed to feel about this? How was he supposed to react? What did this mean, exactly? He wasn’t entirely sure how to work it out. Not on his own, anyway…

“…I want dad”

Loki took Peter’s hand, giving it a squeeze and kissing the back of it.

“Perhaps we should see each other again in a few days” Dr Manning said. “Once you’ve all had some time to adjust to this”

“Perhaps that’s a good idea… I take it we can keep that” he said, nodding toward the letter on the desk.

“Of course” 

Dr Manning folded the letter and handed it to Loki, who put it carefully in his pocket. He had a feeling the rest of the day wasn’t going to be plain sailing.

-

Tony was waiting by the car, and he was looking somehow blank, worried and shocked all at the same time. 

“Dad!” Peter rushed over to him. “Dad, what-”

Loki took him by the shoulders and moved him back. 

“Hey! Dad, c-”

Loki shushed him. Tony wouldn’t look at either of them; just turned his head away, biting his thumb.

“Peter, get in the car”

“But-!”

“Don’t argue; just do as you’re told”

Peter didn’t look happy, but he sensed this wasn’t the time to argue, so he did as he was told. Once the car door was closed, Tony looked at Loki. 

“You’re shaking” Loki said simply. 

Tony shook his head. “…This isn’t happening”

“It is, and it has, and we know it” Loki said gently. “We just need a little time to get used to this new development. You especially”

Tony swallowed, trying hard not to give in and cry. “I don’t know what to do-!”

“You don’t have to do anything” Loki said, putting a hand on his shoulder. “There’s nothing _to_ do, and certainly nothing you _can_ do. It is what it is”

“What about now?! What am I supposed to do _now_?!”

“Stay calm, for a start” Loki said. “Shh, come on. Don’t shout at me for saying this, but you’re ok”

Tony didn’t say anything, but he put his hand over Loki’s on his shoulder.

“We should be getting home”

“I can’t” Tony whispered. “I can’t drive, not after…”

“Darling, you-”

“You drive!” Tony grabbed his keys and pressed them into Loki’s hand. “Please. Please, you-… Please. I can’t. I can’t”

Loki searched Tony’s face. He sighed and nodded. 

“Ok”

-

The journey home was far from comfortable. Peter knew speaking wouldn’t be a good idea, so he curled up on the back seat and pretended to be somewhere else. Tony sat in the front, staring into space and biting his thumb and trying not to give in to tears. Loki focused on the road. Whatever he was feeling, he knew it was painfully obvious who was in the worst state right now. And he knew who was going to need the most looking after - and it wasn’t the same person.

*


	9. Lemons And Weeds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Following on from my usual tradition (even though no one guessed last time round), if you correctly guess the connection between all the names of the chapters, I'll write you a oneshot.
> 
> As always, comments and questions encouraged! Thanks everyone for reading

-

Tony wasn’t happy; that much was clear. One look at his parents, and one second of hearing their frantic whispers and hisses and hushed tones, was enough to tell Peter it would be a good idea to stay out of the way, just for a little while.

Turning the kettle on seemed like the best way to drown out his thoughts - whatever they were. He couldn’t quite comprehend his own mind right now. Part of him knew that blood shouldn’t make a difference - it never had before - but it felt like there was no way it _couldn’t_ make a difference now. He was… Tony Stark was…

He was Tony Stark’s son.

Biologically. 

Genetically. 

By blood.

And there was no denying it…

A day that should have brought closure had instead made things less clear than ever. Suddenly there was so much else Peter needed to know. He couldn’t remember his parents very much at all, but as far as he’d been told, they’d been happily married. Was that a lie? Had Richard and Mary’s marriage been in enough trouble for Mary to cheat? Or had it just been the temptation of a charming celebrity? Was she drunk? Was _Tony_ drunk? How had it happened? How had they met? Had Richard known about it? Had anyone other than Mary known about it? Had Tony known all this time that he’d slept with Peter’s mother, but just never mentioned it? Had he forgotten, or just intentionally covered it up? Or perhaps he didn’t realise who Peter _was -_ after all, by the time he’d come into his life, he was just living with May. Besides, Tony was so firmly of the opinion that there was no _way_ Peter could be his. In fact, that’s what everyone thought. Everyone that mattered, anyway.

Did _Mary_ even know? She must have still been sleeping with Richard, otherwise the pregnancy itself would have been a suspicious right from the start. Maybe she never considered it a viable option. Or refused to consider it. Maybe the timings were a little funny. Maybe… Well, Peter didn’t know. If she _had_ suspected, surely she would have done something about it?

But wait. Tony and Peter had had various sex conversations in the past, and Tony had always been very pro contraception, and said he’d never had a one night stand, or a short lived relationship, without proper protection, and that he always carried condoms and put them on himself to be sure. Mary _had_ to have been a one night stand, otherwise the link would’ve been realised far sooner. And even if not, if they’d used contraception, how could anything like this ever happen? It never would have occurred to either party that a potentially drunken night of celebrity-on-civilian fun could result in… Well, another life.

But…

_The alleged father cannot be excluded as the biological father of the tested child… the probability of paternity is 99.99999999% …the alleged father **IS** the biological father of the tested child._

It was all there in black and white. _It is practically proven that Mr. Anthony Stark is the biological father of the child Peter Parker-Stark._

Peter Parker-Stark.

Parker-Stark…

Wait…

He wasn’t. That wasn’t who he was. Mary had been a Parker by marriage - it had been Richard who was a Parker by birth. He was uncle Ben’s brother. Another Parker by birth, of course. And then of course May; Parker by marriage… Different ways of getting the name, of course, but both valid…

But if Richard had suspected Peter wasn’t his, surely he never would have been allowed to take the name? Unless he knew or suspected it and wanted to conceal it. But as far as Peter knew, men didn’t generally act like a child that might not be there’s, was. In fact, (with facts now emerging), he had no right to the Parker name now either. He wasn’t a Parker. Circumstantially, he’d ended up being with the Parker’s for most of his life, but now, well, where did his claim lie? Who _was_ he, if not a Parker; if not the person he’d grown up thinking he was? He didn’t know. He didn’t… Yes he did. He knew he was. Undeniably, and whether he liked it or not.

He was a Stark.

But even that opened up the floor to more questions. Aside from his life and experiences with the people in this household, and a few articles online, he didn’t really know what being a Stark _meant_ , exactly. Aside from the obvious bits. But even as an adopted son, he didn’t know much about the generations before his father. Tony rarely mentioned his parents, much less talked properly about them, and as far as Peter could tell, he’d never known any of his grandparents, and he didn’t seem to have any extended family. It hadn’t especially bothered him before, but now it felt horribly like he’d been lied to.

In fact, right now, his entire life felt like a lie. There was so much that could have been, _should_ have been - and there was so much that needed to be answered for. There was only one person he could think of that could potentially answer his questions about Richard and Mary.

But she’d been dead for years.

-

Loki calmly took a hand away from his mouth.

“Don’t you think you’re being just a little bit over-dramatic?”

“Absolutely not!” Tony shouted. “And who are you calling over-dramatic?! You’re one of the most dramatic people I’ve ever met”

“As much as I’m enjoying your little pantomime, I do find the weeping and wailing just a little bit over the top, if you don’t mind me saying so”

“Loki, I think you’re deliberately overlooking the emotional impact of this!” Tony took a deep breath, and scoffed. “Well, I couldn’t expect you to understand”

Loki startled a little at that insensitive remark.

“Tactful as always, my darling” Loki said, retaining a lofty air. “Of course I couldn’t. Here I am, looking at my husband, who was so firmly by my side through our failed fertility plans and the sudden realisation that three-person was off the table, my husband who worked through to understanding, and scrapped the idea of even traditional IVF, and settled with me back into a normal life with our adopted son. And I’m looking at that man who so clearly found peace in never making a child from their own self, just like me - and I’m seeing that despite it all, you’d made one already. Just an outsider looking in, my darling. The gravity and shock of the situation completely escapes me”

Tony looked at him for a moment, puzzling out what he was saying, and then turned his head away.

“This is ridiculous!” he growled. “I need a drink!”

-

Tony stormed into the kitchen.

“Oi, what do you think you’re doing? Are you stealing my coffee?!”

Peter startled at the sudden shout, and he shook his head.

“No; I’m just moving it so I can get my tea”

“Oh sure, you really expect me to believe that?” Tony marched over, snatching the coffee from the boy, putting it back in the cupboard, and slamming the cupboard door. “You _know_ you’re not allowed my coffee. N-”

“But I wasn’t taking it!” Peter protested. “I was just-”

“Don’t interrupt me! Now go to your room!”

“What?! Why?!”

“Because I said so! Now do as you’re told!”

“No! That’s not fair! Don’t you think we need to talk and stuff? I wanna ask you-”

“Why can’t you ever just do as you’re damn well told?!” Tony snapped. “Go to your room!”

“But I haven’t done anything wrong! And we need to talk about-”

“The only thing we need to talk about is your constant defiance and bad behaviour! You’ve been spoilt, that’s your problem”

Peter looked at him, outraged. “Well, whose fault is that, then?!” 

“How dare you?” Tony said, dangerously quiet. “Is that what you think? That it’s my fault? Well, do you want to know what _I_ think?”

Peter took a step back. “…What?”

“Tony” Loki said, watching the scene unfold from the doorway. “I think you need to start counting”

Tony looked at him, scowling. “What are you talking about?!”

“I think you know” Loki said, coming over. “Peter, darling, why don’t you go to your room for a little bit? I need to talk to dad”

“But _I_ need to talk! I’ve got a whole bunch of stuff I need to ask, and-”

“Sweetheart. Sweetheart, I know” Loki said gently. “Just give us a few minutes. We’ll talk later”

Peter looked between his parents, settling on Tony.

“I guess this means we’re not going down to the pool again today then”

Tony raised a hand and smacked him across the face.

“TONY!” Loki snapped, grabbing him and moving him firmly backwards. “What are you playing at?! Peter, sweetheart, go to your room. Daddy and I need to have a chat”

Peter was so shocked that he couldn’t move. 

“Didn’t you hear?! Go to your room, you little-”

“Tony! Shut up!” Loki said. He turned to Peter, taking him by the shoulders and kissing him firmly. “Are you alright? Listen, go to your room, and I’ll come and check on you in a few minutes”

Loki ushered Peter out into the corridor and closed the kitchen door firmly behind him. He paused, and then spun round, glaring at Tony.

“What the hell are you playing at?”

“What am _I_ playing at?! He was being rude! Oh what, so I’m not allowed to have discipline in my house anymore?”

“No, Tony! No, he wasn’t being rude! He was disappointed! _And_ he’s upset”

“What’s he got to be upset about?” Tony said scornfully.

“Oh, don’t be so wilfully ignorance! It’s no wonder he’s upset and confused and worried, just like you are. How _dare_ you treat him like that?”

“It was just a little tap!”

“No, it wasn’t, and we both know it. For goodness sake, Anthony! Neither of us have laid a hand on him since before he was turned into a toddler!”

“So?!”

“SO, you can’t just jump back by lashing out at him! I thought we’d phased physical punishment out, albeit under extra-ordinary circumstances, but even if we hadn’t, what’s the one thing we agreed on?”

“Aw Loki, give it a rest. Give me a break, ok? I’ve had-”

“Some difficult news; I know” Loki interrupted. “But we had agreed never to slap his face, remember? So how DARE-”

“For gods sake, Loki, what do you expect me to do?! That kid-”

“Your SON”

“I KNOW!” Tony shouted. “How the fuck am I supposed to get my head around this?! How the FUCK has this happened?”

“I think you know how it happened! Stop screaming at me. You can’t take it out on me, and you certainly can’t take it out on that poor little kid”

“I’m not!”

“You are! I heard your whole argument about a bloody jar of coffee, and obviously I saw what you did, and I heard every threatening word and tone too. You can’t take out your annoyance or frustration or confusion or whatever it is you’re feeling about being Peter’s natural father, out on him, who, for the record, firstly, did not choose to be, or ask to be born, and secondly, would not even exist if it weren’t for you”

There was a brief, heavy silence, and then Tony started crying. He turned and put the kettle on.

“Tony? Darling, I-”

“Leave me alone! I just want to have a coffee in peace for once in my life!”

Loki stopped in his tracks. He sighed silently, lowered his hand, and nodded. 

“I’ll give you some space. Just… Just don’t do anything stupid”

“…Ditto”

Loki looked at him. “Do you remember how you acted when Peter was turned into a toddler?”

Tony tensed. “What are you saying?”

Loki pressed his lips together and shook his head, and left without another word.

-

Loki carefully detached Peter from his elephant and wound his arms round him. Peter flopped against Loki, resting his cheek against his chest, still crying weakly. 

“Alright, sweetheart. It’s ok” Loki said gently. “I’ve got you”

“I didn’t even do anything wrong…”

“I know, darling. Dad’s just tense and volatile right now” 

Peter started crying properly again. 

“Oh, sweetheart! Don’t cry!”

“I’m so confused!” Peter cried. “How can he be my dad?! I don’t get it, I don’t believe it, and I don’t know why he hit me!”

“Alright, alright, breathe, sweetheart” Loki lifted Peter onto the nearest chair and knelt in front of him, taking his hands in his. “He shouldn’t have raised his hand to you like that, there’s no doubt about that. But I’m afraid there’s also no doubt that he… Well, that he’s… Well…”

“Everything I thought I knew about my life is a lie!”

“That’s not necessarily true, chick”

“It is! I thought I had a normal start, but I didn’t! I thought I was Richard Parker’s son, but I’m NOT! And if I wasn’t _his_ son, then I wasn’t ever really Ben Parker’s nephew, which means I wasn’t really _May’s_ nephew, which means-”

“Peter, stop it” Loki said. “Y-”

“The only one I was really related to was Mary! So the rest of them were never really my family!”

Loki looked at him carefully. “Am I not really your family, then?”

“Wh-what? What do you mean?!” Peter started sobbing. “You’re my daddy!”

“Honey, we’ve been through this, and I thought we’d both come to the understanding that blood wasn’t the most important thing. Certainly no one I see as family is blood related. In fact, the only blood relative I ever met, I’m certain didn’t really know who I was, and anyway, that person is… dead”

“You killed him, right?”

“Enough about that” Loki said hurriedly. “My point is, you’re my son, and I’m your father, regardless of blood. And… species? So… Well, I never knew them, but if you always saw Richard and Ben as your family, then that’s what they are, even if they’re dead now, and even if you’re from different bloodlines. And there’s no denying May was your family, and still is, even though… Sweetheart, she never would have been a blood relative even if you _were_ Richard’s. She married into the Parker family, didn’t she? You were related to all of them through marriage if nothing else… Your parents were married, weren’t they?”

Peter nodded. “…I feel like I’ve been lied to”

“I know” Loki squeezed his hands. “I understand what it feels like”

“Dad really didn’t know, did he?”

Loki shook his head slightly. 

“Do you… Do you think my mother knew?”

“I don’t know” Loki said. “I’d imagine she had an inkling that you might not be her husbands. Women seem to have a sense about that kind of thing. But women on this world don’t generally talk openly about people they slept with when in a relationship with someone else”

“Do you think this means that I’ve got a brother or sister somewhere? Like, another kid dad doesn’t know about?”

“I highly doubt that, chick”

“I wish there was a way to know for sure”

“Well” Loki said. “I can think of one way, but it’s not one I’d use…”

Peter blinked hard. “What is it?”

“…Do you remember uncle Thor telling you about Heimdall?” 

“Asgard’s gatekeeper? That guy that can see and hear pretty much everything in the universe?”

Loki nodded. “He also has an exceptionally vast memory. Call it a database”

“You think he’d know?”

“Yes”

“Can you ask him?”

“I haven’t been to Asgard in years, darling. Not since long before I met you for the first time. I’m not going back now” Loki said. “I understand why you’re asking, but believe me when I say I believe your father, and know he’s telling the truth when he said he always used protection. I’m sure you know that none of it is 100% effective. Lots of female contraceptive devices are more than 99% effective with perfect use, although obviously they don’t really apply here” Loki cleared his throat. “As we’ve been through before, a male condom is 98% effective with perfect use. 2% is a slim margin, so you- well, your mother falling pregnant was, well, an anomaly” 

“So you’re saying I shouldn’t’ve been born?”

“I’m not saying that at all!” Loki said, shocked. 

He stood up and pulled Peter to his feet, guiding him over to the bed where they could sit together comfortably.

“That wasn’t what I was saying” Loki said, putting an arm round Peter and resting back against the headboard. “What I was saying was that it was a rare and strange thing for your mother to fall pregnant after having protected sex during a one night stand. Your conception wasn’t planned but your birth was, otherwise it never would have happened”

“What would you have done? If you’d slept with a celebrity and gotten pregnant, but you were married and like, maybe couldn’t tell anyone, if you thought it was theirs? Would you keep it?”

“Oh Peter, I don’t know” Loki sighed. “Let’s not turn this already strange conversation into an abstract one”

“Sorry…I know we’ve all talked about it before, but… that’s definitely what he always used?”

“Sweetheart, your father slept with a lot of women back in the day, arguably an unhealthy amount of them. He’d’ve been a hotbed for STI’s if he hadn’t used condoms, and he very well could have made himself ill and put himself out of action if he hadn’t been careful. I think that much is apparent… Sorry, I know talking about your parents sex life isn’t exactly comfortable”

“It’s ok. I knew a lot of that stuff before I even met him. He was always known as a Playboy, right?”

“Mm. Your father might have - well, did - play around a lot, but he was always safe about it, too. I suppose he had to be. Sweetheart, I firmly believe you’re the only one. The chances of there being another are too slim”

“The chances of me being his were non-existent before today”

Loki sighed. “Oh sweetheart, I wish I knew exactly what to say to you… I can ask Thor to talk to Heimdall if it would put your mind at rest”

Peter didn’t say anything, but he nodded. Loki gave him a squeeze.

“Is there anything else you want to say?” he asked gently.

“Are you still into all that freaky bedroom stuff?”

Loki couldn’t help but burst out laughing, and Peter glared at him.

“Sorry! I’m sorry! Sorry. It’s just the way you said it! It came out so abruptly and with such confidence!” Loki shook his head. “I know what you’re referring to, and since you’re asking and we’re all about honesty today, I’m ok sharing that the answer is no; we haven’t been for a long time now”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. I suppose we just phased out of it; moved on from it. Perhaps we just prefer being soft. Your father and I, our relationship is in a good place and we’re happy together. I think that’s the bit you need most concern yourself with, and not the inner workings of our intimate lives”

Peter went quiet for a few moments, thinking back to what had happened in Dr Manning’s office.

“…You didn’t look surprised”

“Hm?”

“When you saw the… When you saw the results. You didn’t look too surprised”

“No… But that doesn’t mean I didn’t _feel_ surprised”

“Doesn’t it almost feel like the papers knew something we didn’t?”

“I don’t think so. How could they? Everyone knows they’re just trying their luck and making up news stories. It’s just that they happened upon a coincidence. I can see where you’re coming from, though”

“I wish I could ask my mother about it”

Loki hugged Peter properly. 

“I really wish I could talk to May about it…”

Loki sighed and rested his cheek against Peter’s head. “Oh sweetheart…”

“I think I wanna go away for a while”

“You’re not going anywhere” Loki said, hugging him tight. “You’re my little boy and you’re staying right here, where you belong”

Peter pulled away from him, much to Loki’s surprise.

“Tiny? What is it?”

Peter looked down at his hands. “What if I don’t belong here anymore?”

“What? What do you mean?”

“What if dad doesn’t want me anymore?”

“Peter, h-”

“He was so weird with me… He wouldn’t look at me after the doctors, and then I got into trouble for no reason in the kitchen, and he was being all threatening, and then-”

“I know, I know. Slow down, chick” Loki said. “Darling, I know it was scary, but he was just being unreasonable because he’s scared. He needs time to get his head around this too. Things should settle soon enough”

“And if they don’t?”

“They will. Now, we’ve survived a lot, our little household. We’ll survive this little wobble too. Let the dust settle before you try to talk to him in depth though, ok?”

“But I’ve got so much I need to talk about”

“I know… Well, you’ll just have to talk to me or your elephant for the time being”

Peter took a deep breath, and sighed. “I don’t know what to do”

Loki rested a hand on Peter’s thigh. “Maybe a little sleep would be a good idea”

He went to get up, but Peter grabbed his hand. 

“Don’t go”

Loki hesitated, and relented. “Alright, chick. I’ll stay with you”

“Wait, dad?”

“Yes?”

“Do you… have any condoms?”

“Uhhh!” Loki tried hard not to laugh. “Why?”

“Well, Midtown didn’t really do sex ed, and it’s all kinda medical instead of practical what little we’ve had at St Hendricks…”

“I see. I thought Tony-… I guess not. Alright, well, if we must” Loki sighed. “I’ll just be a minute”

Peter sat up properly when Loki got back.

“Your schools really should have taught you this stuff” Loki said, handing him the pack. “It’s so basic”

“Well, technically we’re underage, so…”

“When has that ever stopped anyone?” Loki said, raising an eyebrow and sitting down beside him. “The school system in this country is one of the worst in Midgard. Dreadful, you wouldn’t believe how many young people I’ve had to teach how to put on a condom. And then they wonder why teenage pregnancy is such a dilemma”

Peter looked shocked for a moment, but then remembered where Loki worked. Contraception talk wasn’t really outside of his realm of expertise, he supposed…

“I _kind of_ know how they work, but I’ve not, like, practised. I’ve never even opened one of these before” he said, raising the pack to his mouth.

“Hey, hey, what are you doing?!” Loki grabbed his wrist. “ _Never_ open them with your teeth! It puts you at huge risk of damaging it”

“Oh, right” Peter said. Blushing, he opening it sensibly. “Ew, it feels weird. Like, almost wet”

“Well, you’ll find that they’re slightly lubricated, and many have spermicides on them too. Hence the moisture”

“Oh. Is this bit supposed to be there?”

“Not all prophylactics have a teat. You just give it a little pinch to get the air out once you’ve put it on the tip, before you roll it down. Make sure you have it the right way otherwise it’ll just roll straight back up again. You’ll need to start again with a new one if you put one on the wrong way”

“I think I remember being told that”

Peter listened to Loki explaining use and precautions to him, and he paid attention, but then he became hyper aware of the stereo - and the first few bars of The Blackpool Belle starting to play. Loki and Peter made eye contact, and burst out laughing.

“How apt!”

Peter giggled. “Yeah, isn’t there a bit about pulling the curtains down and ‘going to town’ on the train?”

“You shouldn’t be picking that sort of stuff up at your age!”

“I love how you say that after giving me a condom tutorial”

Loki laughed. “You’re a weird little kid, Tiny”

“There’s just one thing I don’t get” Peter said.

“And what’s that?”

“People always go on about them tearing. But if it’s so easy to tear them, why can I do this?” he asked, and stretched the sheath over his hand and up his arm. “There’s a lot of stretch in this! Plus, this also defeats that excuse of them being too small, right?”

“Well, not exactly” Loki said, still laughing a little. “They’re pretty hardy, but sharp things - like your teeth or jewellery or anything like that - can tear them, and even a pinprick in a condom voids its use. Also expired condoms are weaker and tear more easily, and if you use oil-based lube it can weaken it and make it more likely to tear. Now take that off your arm!”

Peter did as he was told. “Don’t you think they’re a bit weird looking?”

“Not really. As for your other question, their stretch doesn’t mean they’re one size fits all, although they are fairly universal. You can fit two litres of fluid in one of those if you want to. Jo Jo showed me”

“Ew”

“It was for a class in clinic” Loki said. “They can be uncomfortable if they’re too tight, and more likely to slip off if they’re too loose. You can get them in a range of sizes, so no one can pull the excuse of them not fitting. And, if anyone tries to pull the allergy card, it’s not that common for people to be allergic to them, so be suspicious. Most condoms nowadays are latex free anyway, and you can get hypoallergenic ones too”

“Oh, I get it” Peter said. “Why do they make flavoured ones, though?”

“For oral sex, I suppose” Loki said. “Sweetie, this is all curiosity talk, right? You’re not… planning something?”

“What? No, I’m not planning anything! I was just kinda curious. No one’s ever gone through this with me properly before”

“Oh good” Loki said. “…So you and the bunnies definitely aren’t..?”

“No! Yuck, give me a break, daddy. I don’t think I’m even friends with that lot anymore, so even if I _did_ want to - which I don’t - it’s not gonna happen. And anyway, to be honest, I’m not really… Well, I’m not really into sex and stuff” he paused, and swallowed. “I’m not like my dad”

Loki sighed and put an arm round his shoulders, pulling him close. 

“I think now might be a good time for that little sleep” he said.

Peter nodded. “Yeah, I guess so. You’ll still stay with me, right?”

Loki kissed him on the temple. “Of course I will”

“Do you think dad will be ready to talk to me when I wake up?”

“Maybe” Loki said. 

Peter wasn’t exactly reassured, but he tried to keep Tony out of his mind. He lay down on his side, his back to Loki. Loki lay down beside him, staring up at the ceiling, and they listened to the stereo, knowing Tony would be listening to the same song wherever he was in the house. And they hoped he’d feel the same about it as they did.

*


	10. We're Crippled And We're Dazed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is such a long chapter. As always, comments/questions welcome!

-

When Peter woke up, he had a feeling things were no better than when he’d fallen asleep. Loki had gone, which was the first warning sign. The stereo being turned off was the second one.

-

Tony held Loki’s hand, but refused to look at him.

“This hasn’t really come at the best time” Loki sighed. “Are you still going to that conference tomorrow?”

“Are you still going away with Jo Jo?”

“I asked first”

“…I probably should. Pepper needs me there. Professionally, obviously…” he swallowed. “Your turn”

“…This night away is already a replacement for the ward-wide trip that fell through. You know he took that quite hard” Loki said. “It would be a shame to cancel it. But at the same time…”

“You should go. I’m gonna be away overnight anyway, so you may as well”

Loki thought for a moment. “What about the baby?”

“What do I care?”

“Don’t be like that!” Loki said, pulling his hand away. “Now are you going to talk to him or not?”

“And say what?” Tony said, finally turning to look at him. “Say; ‘hey kid, so it seems you did come from my jizz after all. Sorry I can’t remember who your mother was!’. Get real, Loki! How do you think that’s gonna go down?”

“He wants to talk to you, Tony. He _needs_ to. He’s got a lot of questions, and I think you have a lot to answer for”

“I don’t remember the kids mother, alright? How could I? What exactly is it I’m supposed to answer for? I’m just that minority who had dodgy contraception one time, and it resulted in… _that_. So what?”

“Ok, so you may not have that sort of answer” Loki said. “But you can talk to him about how you’re both feeling and about what you might be thinking. You owe him that much at least”

“Why?!”

“Why?! Because he’s your son! He’s only alive because of you! You’re the reason he exists!”

Tony looked a little taken aback. “Are you shouting at me?”

“Almost! You can’t just sulk in here forever!”

“I’m not! Can’t I take five minutes to gather my thoughts?”

“You’ve had five _hours_!” Loki sighed heavily, irritably. “You’re not the only one going through this! You’re not the only one affected by those DNA results. You need to talk to your son!”

Tony stood up. “No. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a long day tomorrow, so I’m gonna go and pack. You should probably think about doing the same”

“But what about Peter?”

“I don’t care!” Tony snapped, and he stormed out of the room.

Loki growled in annoyance. Part of him wanted to run after his stubborn bastard of a husband and shake some sense into him. But another part of him knew that was a bad idea. 

-

Loki bumped into Peter in the corridor. He sighed and put an arm round the boys shoulders.

“Do you remember me saying that me and Jo Jo are going away?”

Peter thought for a moment. “That’s… tomorrow, right?”

“Yes, and your father’s got that conference, remember?”

Peter nodded. “Are you..?”

“We’re both keeping to our plans”

“We got… we got all wrapped up in the press and stuff. I forgot” Peter said.

Loki lead him into his bedroom. “You can keep me company while I pack”

Peter sat down on Loki’s bed, touching the black silk covers gently. He didn’t spend so much time in Loki’s room anymore, but, looking around, it looked just the same as always: the same furniture, much of the same decor, the same pictures on the walls, the big snow globe collection, the Betty Boop lamp, the old Snoopy toy on the chair by the wardrobe… There was something comforting about it.

Loki got out a small case. Peter watched him pack the usual overnight stuff, and then his pill box, and his Musselflex, and his book, and his notebook, and his holiday mug with the Flopsy Bunnies on it.

“What about your pig?”

“I’ll pack him in the morning” Loki said. 

Peter looked at the scrubby old Ikea pig lounging on the bed. He’d always like that Loki had a cuddly toy, and especially in recent times, he’d found it reassuring to know that his father slept with a cuddly toy in his arms. It made him feel better about doing it himself. It seemed to be a bit of a family thing, as even Tony was partial to curling up with a teddy bear. 

“Where’s dad?”

“Packing” Loki said, rearranging his case.

Peter stood up.

“Peter, I wouldn’t if I were you”

“But I’m not you” Peter said, and he went anyway. 

-

Tony’s ears pricked up when he heard his bedroom door crack open.

“Loki, leave me alone!”

“Guess again…”

Tony looked over his shoulder, and then turned and straightened up, looking at Peter. For a moment they just looked at each other, and then, slowly, cautiously, Peter approached, stopping a couple of feet from him. Tony reached out and gently touched Peter’s face, and then ran his fingers through the boys hair, looking at him carefully. He pulled back for a second, and then pushed the boys curls back firmly from his forehead, and looked him in the eye.

“I didn’t know”

“I know…”

Peter wasn’t sure what to do. He felt almost sick with nerves and tension, and there was the very real possibility that Tony would lash out at him again. All he really knew was that he didn’t want to leave just yet. 

Tony rested his free hand on Peter’s shoulder, and just when it looked at though he was going to pull him close, he cleared his breath and withdrew. 

“Go to bed” he said, turning his back on him. “I need to pack”

-

Peter couldn’t face going back to Loki after that, although he quite wanted to. He went to his room instead, where he threw his clothes off and crawled into bed. He wasn’t sure what to think, but aside from his mixed up feelings about what they’d found out today, he also felt like he was about to be abandoned. His parents were both getting ready for separate trips, and one night was going to feel like a long time under these circumstances. Loki was off with Jo Jo, and the thought of going with them had never crossed his mind, but Tony had said he’d see if he could take Peter along to this conference. Somehow he didn’t think that was going to happen now. He wasn’t sure whether he should pack an overnight bag or not. He guessed not. Chances were, he’d be left at home and Thor or one of the Avengers would stop over to keep an eye on him. He hoped Tony would talk to him before then, because he really needed to know how much he was allowed to share.

-

Peter slept late, and he would have stayed asleep if he hadn’t been woken up by his phone going off. He jumped considerably, and, grabbing the handset, growled in annoyance when he realised he’d accidentally set an alarm. Still, it was very nearly midday, so he dragged himself out of bed.

It wasn’t as easy as it should have been, as he was struggling to open his eyes, and his head felt funny and the room seemed to be moving a bit too much, and he felt like if he stopped moving he’d fall asleep and collapse. Despite all this, he managed to have a quick wash and get dressed. He was just about to go and find Tony when there was a knock, and his door opened.

“Oh, you’re awake” Loki said, surprised. “You need to get an overnight bag packed, chick”

“Oh!”

“You should probably get something to eat first, though”

Peter nodded. “I’m gonna go and talk to dad”

“He’s already left, sweetheart” Loki said. “I thought you knew. I thought he would’ve… Never mind; you’ll see him tomorrow, and you can ring him tonight”

Peter was quiet for a moment, trying to make sense of everything in his head.

“If he’s gone without me, why do I need an overnight bag?”

“You’re coming with me” Loki said. “Get yourself something to eat, chick. Time is of the essence”

“I’m not hungry”

Loki sighed and put an arm round him. “You still need to eat. You didn’t eat anything last night, either. You’ve missed breakfast by staying in bed so long, and I’m not going to let you miss another meal. Go and get something to eat. No arguing”

“Why didn’t dad say goodbye to me?”

“Peter, go and get something to eat”

“I said I’m not hungry!”

“And I said you still need to eat! Do as you’re told!”

“No!”

Loki sighed heavily. “Fine, but don’t blame me when you feel sick from hunger. Now pack your overnight bag”

Peter folded his arms over his chest and shook his head.

“Fine, I’ll pack for you” Loki said. “Now, are you going to get dressed, or do I have to do that for you too?”

“…I’ll get dressed”

“Good boy” Loki nodded. “Go on, then. Jo Jo will be here within the hour”

Peter dragged himself out of bed, grabbed an armful of clothes, and went to the en suite, locking the door behind him. Why hadn’t Tony said goodbye to him? He _always_ said goodbye to him, even if he was in a rush or leaving early. He wanted an answer. He wanted to crawl back into bed, too. He didn’t really understand why he was going away with Loki and Jo Jo. He didn’t have anything _against_ Jo Jo, but he’d never seen him outside of the hospital. He didn’t feel up to that kind of social interaction. He wanted to stay home, but more than that, he wanted his dad.

-

Loki warned Jo Jo that Peter was in a bad mood, and Peter did a good job of confirming that statement. He didn’t say a word, and wouldn’t look at Jo Jo properly. He dragged his feet to the car, throwing his bag unceremoniously into the back foot well. There wasn’t anything important in it, as far as he knew. Loki had packed it. Peter had shoved a handful of CDs in there, but he didn’t bother looking at what else had been packed. 

“Peter, don’t throw things about like that” Loki sighed.

Peter pouted. He didn’t have anything else to throw. Besides, one little bag wasn’t exactly going to damage Jo Jo’s little Fiat Tipo anyway. He sat in the back seat, folded his arms over his chest, and sulked. He didn’t want to be there at all.

-

It wasn’t an especially long drive, but it felt like an eternity to Peter. He’d forgotten his earphones, and he couldn’t really hear the radio over the two men talking, so he had no choice but to listen to Loki and Jo Jo laughing and bantering together for the whole journey. It was uncomfortably warm in the car, with the sun blaring in on them, and he felt sick. Maybe it was also due to not having eaten, but there was no way he was going to pipe up and admit it. 

“What’s the matter, little guy?” Jo Jo said, looking at him in the rear view mirror. “You feeling a little funny? Here”

He held a bottle of water out to him. Peter looked at it distastefully and turned pointedly to look out of the window.

“Peter, don’t be rude!” Loki said. He sighed and shook his head. “Just drop it. He’ll have it if he wants it”

“Well, if you’re sure” Jo Jo said, dropping the bottle on the back seat. 

Peter knocked it into the foot well. Jo Jo didn’t seem to see, but Loki gave him a look. Peter pretended not to notice.

-

It was a relief to finally arrive there - wherever they were. Peter looked at the house when they got out of the car. Normally, he’d have been in his element. It was a perfectly normal house, not too big and not too small. A good, healthy size, with a brass doorknocker and small pointy trees in pots either side of the front door. It was detached, with it’s own little driveway - the kind of thing Peter liked. But today, he wasn’t feeling great, so he couldn’t find it in himself to appreciate the little bit of normality before him. 

“Oh, I’ve just thought of something” Jo Jo said as they got the bags from the car. “It’s only two bedrooms. One with a double bed, one with a single”

“I remember you saying” Loki said.

“Well, since we have the extra person” Jo Jo looked at Peter, who glared at him. He simply smiled, and then winked at Loki. “Looks like we’re gonna have to share tonight”

“Don’t be a fool, Jo Jo” Loki said, but he smiled. “The baby will share the double with me. You can have the single room”

Jo Jo sighed, pretending to be disappointed. “Can’t blame me for trying”

Peter narrowed his eyes at them. Jo Jo’s feelings about Loki were something of an open secret, and wasn’t a threat, but that didn’t mean Peter had to like it. 

-

Peter threw his bag down in the hallway. The house was filled with that oh-so-familiar holiday rental smell, and it made everything feel just a little bit strange. 

“Why don’t you explore the house, sweetheart?” Loki said. “See if you can work out the oven instructions”

Working out how to operate strange ovens was generally Peter’s speciality in holiday homes, but he didn’t feel like flipping through carefully laminated instructions books, so he didn’t. There was a staircase to his left, which Loki went up with his and Jo Jo’s overnight bags. Jo Jo went through the doorway on the right. Peter gave it a moment, and then followed. It was a large room, with a lounge area at the back by the French doors. The rest of the room was half a kitchen, and half a dining area. Jo Jo was busy unpacking a cooler bag.

“Do you want a drink, little guy?” Jo Jo asked. “You look a bit dehydrated”

Peter ignored him and went to walk past, but Jo Jo skirted round the counter and stopped him.

“Hey, what’s the matter? Don’t you like me anymore?” Jo Jo asked, resting a hand on Peter’s shoulder. “I thought we were friends”

“Why would I wanna be friends with _you_?” Peter snapped, pushing his hand away.

Jo Jo laughed awkwardly. “Alright, alright. You’re a funny kid, you know”

He went to ruffle his hair, but Peter slapped his hand.

“Ow! Hey..!” 

Jo Jo sighed as Peter stalked past and went through the door into the next room. Something was definitely up with that kid. He’d never seen him like this before.

-

“Hey, Loki?” Jo Jo said when Loki came back downstairs. “Is everything alright?”

Loki looked at him. “Why?”

“I’ve never seen him act like this before”

“He’s just sulking, Jo Jo”

“Well…”

“What?”

“He got a bit cross with me” Jo Jo said. “I only offered him a drink, and asked what was the matter”

“What did he do?” Loki asked.

“Ignored me at first, and then snapped at me, and hit-”

“He _hit_ you?!”

“Well, hit my hand away, pushed me a little. Is he just having a bad day?”

“He’s being a little chancer” Loki said. “Will you excuse me for a moment?”

Peter was only in the next room, so it wasn’t difficult for Loki to find him. He shut the door behind him.

“Can I have a word?”

“I don’t suppose I’ve got a choice” Peter grumbled.

Loki sat down with him. “What’s this I hear about you being rude to Jo Jo? Slapping his hand away?”

“What makes you think he’s telling the truth?”

“Jo Jo is many things, but he’s not a liar” Loki said. “Did you do it?”

“No! Well, yeah, actually, I guess I did…”

“You guess?”

“I did, ok! I didn’t want him touching me. Who does he think he is?”

“I think you’re being a little unreasonable. You should apologise”

“I’m not apologising”

“Fine, if you want to be rude and naughty, that’s your prerogative” Loki said. “We’d planned to go for a walk once we arrived. Do you want something to eat first?”

Peter shook his head.

“You need to eat, chick”

“I don’t want to! I’m not hungry!”

“Alright, alright, don’t bite my head off!” Loki shook his head and sighed. “Come on, then. May as well get a good walk in while the weather’s still good”

-

Peter couldn’t help feeling terribly like a third wheel. Loki and Jo Jo were just friends, obviously, but even so. They were busy talking and laughing together, walking ahead quite happily, like they didn’t have a care in the world. Peter wasn’t sure whether Loki was putting on a brave face, or whether he didn’t care about what they’d found out at the doctors, or if he’d actually forgotten it.

Peter trudged along behind them, hands in his pocket. It was too hot, and he felt sick and wobbly and weak, and cross. They were on field footpaths too, so his allergies were starting to play up, so he was feeling pretty miserable. 

“Hey, you know these are also known as kissing gates” Jo Jo said as they reached a stile.

This caught Peter’s attention, as it was something he remembered being told. Jo Jo went first.

“Don’t try your luck” Loki said.

Jo Jo laughed, and kissed Loki on the cheek when he was halfway over. Peter scowled. He wanted to turn back, but he didn’t have the house key, so he supposed he had no choice but to follow. He hauled himself over, and when he was stood on the step on the other side, Jo Jo kissed him on the cheek, much to his surprise.

“Yuck! What do you think you’re doing?!” Peter fumed, and gave him a shove.

It was a proper push too, and Jo Jo fell backwards and landed in the brambles.

“Oh god! Are you ok?!” Loki gasped.

“I’m fine, I’m fine!” Jo Jo said, laughing it off in his usual sunny-tempered way. 

Loki helped him up, making sure he was ok, and then turned to Peter. Peter wavered, wondering if he should make a run for it. Loki grabbed him under the arms, lifting him off the step and plonking him down on his feet on the ground.

“What are you playing at?” he hissed. “How dare you? You’d better watch your step, young man”

Peter narrowed his eyes slightly, but otherwise didn’t react. Loki fixed him with a hard look, and then let him go, and carried on walking. Within seconds, Loki and Jo Jo were chatting away like nothing had happened. Peter wasn’t sure why, but it made him cross.

-

They took a different route back, and along the way came across the stream. It was only a few feet wide, and Loki and Jo Jo stepped over without too much trouble. Peter took his hands out of his pockets and went to follow, but his foot slipped on the wet grass and he fell, landing on his hands and knees in the stream with a splash. There was half a second of silence, and then Loki and Jo Jo burst out laughing. Peter was angry already, and now he was also embarrassed, and wet, and his hands and knees hurt - so he didn’t appreciate being laughed at, and directed his frustration at Jo Jo.

“Shut up, you stupid bastard! You wouldn’t think it was funny if it was you!”

“Peter!” Loki said, struggling to stop laughing. “Don’t be so rude!”

Peter tried to climb out of the stream, but his foot slipped again, and he fell heavily and sprawled on the bank - which only made Loki and Jo Jo laugh more. Peter swallowed hard, hot tears stinging his eyes, and he reached out, grabbed Jo Jo’s ankle, and tugged. Loki managed to catch Jo Jo before he could fall. He helped steady his friend, and then turned to Peter.

“You stupid, naughty little boy! What are you playing at?” he scolded, grabbing Peter by the collar and pulling him to his feet. “You’re on thin ice, young man! Very thin ice”

Peter looked down, hoping to hide the tears in his eyes.

“You might well be ashamed!” Loki shook his head disapprovingly. “Did you hurt yourself when you fell?”

Peter pushed his hand away and didn’t say anything.

“Aww, the poor little thing” Jo Jo said. “He’s all wet. Sorry we laughed at you, little guy”

Peter knew any further kindness would cause him to break down in tears, so he ignored him. He kept his head down and wrapped his arms round himself.

“He’ll dry off in the sun” Loki said. “Let’s carry on”

-

The rest of the walk passed without incident. Peter’s clothes were still wet when they got back to the house. Loki grabbed a set of clean clothes from Peter’s bag, which remained by the stairs, and told him to get changed. Peter slunk into the downstairs bathroom and did as he was told. He felt dreadful, and his hands shook so much he could hardly do the button up on his trousers. He felt sicker than ever, and when he stepped out of the bathroom, the hallway seemed to lurch beneath his feet. Loki saw.

“Right, that’s it” he said, lifting Peter into his arms. “You’re having something to eat, right now”

“I’m not hungry!” Peter insisted, trying to struggle away from Loki. 

“You need to eat” Loki said firmly, setting him down on the kitchen counter.

“Is everything ok?” Jo Jo asked, looking up from the table.

“It’ll be right as rain as soon as we’ve got some food into him” Loki said, setting about making a sandwich for the boy.

“I don’t _want_ any food!” Peter said, slipping off the kitchen counter.

He went to leave, but Jo Jo stopped him.

“Hey, what is it? I know you haven’t eaten since yesterday lunchtime. That’s more than twenty-four hours” Jo Jo said. “What’s up? Is it a weight thing? You know, dieting at your age can be really dangerous, especially if this is your way of doing it. You’re not fat, Peter. You need to keep a healthy weight. Ignore the papers and magazines. You need to look after yourself, kiddo. Have a little snack. You’ll feel better for it”

Peter stared at him. For a moment he was silent, and then he exploded.

“Who the fuck do you think you are?!” he shouted. “Don’t patronise me, don’t try to preach to me, don’t act like you know me or understand me! You can’t just go around accusing people of being anorexic!”

“Peter, that’s enough” Loki said firmly.

“No, it’s not!” Peter shouted. “Mind your own business! Is it not enough for me to just not be hungry? You’re interfering with stuff that doesn’t concern you!”

“Ok, little guy, ok” Jo Jo said, in a voice similar to what he used when talking to a screaming baby at work.

Peter picked up on this, and he started shaking worse than before. He opened his mouth to shout, but before he could say anything else, Loki grabbed his shoulder.

“Stop it. Jo Jo’s just concerned. Now eat this” Loki said, putting a plate down on the unit.

“I won’t! I said I’m not hungry! I don’t need-”

“Do as you’re told, this instant, young man! Or you’ll be in a whole heap of trouble!” Loki shouted.

Peter went quiet, shocked, and Jo Jo took a step back. 

“Sit at the table” Loki said in a much softer voice.

Peter nodded, taking the plate and going over to the table. Jo Jo stared at Loki. He’d heard him shout before, but never in anger. Certainly never like that. Loki gave his shoulder a squeeze.

“Don’t look so shocked” he said gently. “Me shouting will never be as scary as _you_ shouting”

“I wouldn’t like to bet” Jo Jo said. 

Loki filled a glass with milk and took it over to the table, setting it down by Peter.

“Go on” he said, nodding toward the plate. “Eat up”

Peter glanced at him, and then picked up a triangle of sandwich and took a bite.

“Good boy” Loki said, resting a hand on Peter’s head for a moment. “Good boy…”

-

Peter felt a little better after eating. He didn’t feel sick anymore, anyway, so that was something. Loki had left the room, so he was able to eat without being watched. He went and put his plate and glass by the sink when he’d finished.

“Feeling better?” Jo Jo asked, stopping by the kitchen area.

“Don’t pretend you care”

Jo Jo sighed. “Maybe I do. You’re one of my best friends’ son. You’re a sweet kid too. Most of the time. I thought we go along”

Peter scowled at him. He didn’t need to be lectured, especially not by Jo Jo. 

“Have I done something? Is it because I was flirting with your dad?”

“You’re _always_ flirting with daddy” Peter said. “You don’t exactly go out of your way to hide the fact that you want to sleep with him”

“Ouch!” Jo Jo said, but he laughed. “I never knew you had such a cutting tongue. Hey, you know we’re just friends. I wouldn’t interfere with any married mans relationship, least of all your dads”

“Really? Could’ve fooled me”

“You know, Peter, I like to think I’m a pretty easy-going sort of guy” Jo Jo said, tightly. “But you’re really starting to get to me”

“So? That’s not my problem. What are you talking to me for, anyway? Don’t you have anything better to do?”

“I was checking on you. Is that a crime?”

“I don’t need checking on. Piss off and leave me alone”

Jo Jo grabbed Peter’s wrist to stop him walking off. “Don’t try me, little guy. You’re just a naughty little child - and I’m not as soft as I look”

“You mean thick?”

Jo Jo narrowed his eyes. “You need to behave yourself”

“And you need to mind your own damn business, you stupid prick!”

“You know, I’m getting sick of your attitude! You need some good old-fashioned discipline, little guy”

“For gods sake, shut the fuck up!! Either go away or prove you’re not the stupid, soft, pining little twat we both know you are!”

There was a pause, in which Jo Jo didn’t seem to react.

“Well, if that’s the way you want to play this” 

Before Peter knew what was happening, he was bent over the nearest counter with Jo Jo holding him in place with a hand to his back. He was so shocked that he didn’t even struggle at first. He recovered himself a moment later, quickly looking behind him and seeing the man raise a hand.

“JOHN!”

The shout made both of them jump. Jo Jo released Peter, who scurried backwards, putting a good distance between them.

“I-I’m sorry! I don’t know what came over me” Jo Jo said. “Loki, I-”

“I heard what he said. I’m sorry. But don’t you ever lay a hand on my boy” Loki said, coming over and giving Jo Jo a quick squeeze. “Peter, apologise at once!”

“I won’t! I’ve got nothing to be sorry for!” Peter shouted. “ _He’s_ the one who went for me!”

“You’ve been pushing your luck all day, you little imp! Apologise, or there’ll be trouble!”

“No!!” Peter shouted, and he started throwing a very loud tantrum. 

Loki watched for a moment, and then rubbed the space between his eyebrows with his fore and middle fingers, and then gave a heavy sigh and straightened up.

“I’m so sorry about this, Jo Jo. Would you excuse me for five minutes?”

Jo Jo nodded.

“Right, that’s enough. Come on, Peter” Loki said, taking hold of him.

“Hey, let go! I’ve still got stuff to say!” Peter yelled.

“You’ve said enough” Loki said, and he threw the boy over his shoulder and marched him upstairs.

-

Loki endured quite the attack to his back from Peter’s fists on the way upstairs, but he bore it. Once inside the bedroom, he closed the door, set Peter on his feet, grabbed the boy by the shoulders, and gave him a little shake.

“What the _hell_ has gotten into you?!” he hissed. “You’re behaving ridiculously!”

“I’m not being ridiculous! Why are you cross at _me_?! Your bit on the side was gonna hit me!”

“What did you just say?”

Peter knew that tone. He took a step back, shaking Loki’s hands off his shoulders, and wondering for the second time that day whether or not he should leg it.

“How dare you? You bad, bad boy! How dare you speak to me like that? How dare you be so disrespectful?”

Peter thought about apologising, just for a split second. But he didn’t. Instead, he shrieked and shouted, not making any real sense, and certainly not doing anything to defuse the situation. Loki stood and watched him for a minute or two, trying to work out what had triggered the days behaviour and this current major outburst. It was more than just a kiddies tantrum now.

There was a short pause in Peter’s shouts, and Loki interjected.

“What am I going to do with you, Peter?” he said. “Your behaviour today has been absolutely atrocious. I fear you’ve dug yourself in a hole you can’t get out of”

Peter started screaming at him again. After a few seconds, Loki started responding, and soon they were in a full blown argument. And it went on for a long time.

-

“That’s enough!” Loki shouted eventually. “This has gone far enough! You’ve had your say; you’ve screamed your little lungs out, you’ve been as horrible as it is possible for you to be. That’s enough! You’re in so much trouble!”

“It’s not fair!!”

“It’s entirely fair! Now stop screaming. I’m at a loss of what else to do, so I’m going to spank you. Just wait till I tell your father about this”

There was a short silence, and then Peter suddenly burst into tears and started howling. It was such a stark and sudden change in atmosphere and emotion that, for a moment, Loki didn’t know how to react. 

“Peter? Hey…”

Fully expecting him to shout and pull away, Loki wrapped his arms round the boy. Instead, Peter clung to him and bawled into his chest. Loki held him tight, and for a long while, let him wail.

“Alright. Alright. Peter, sweetheart, you’re being hysterical. You need to stop now”

“I-… I CAN’T”

“Yes, you can. You can, and you will, otherwise you’ll just keep getting worse. You have to calm down”

“I CAN’T!”

“Yes you can” Loki sat down on the bed, holding Peter close at his side. “You can. Just breathe”

“It _hurts_!”

“Of course it does: you’ve overexerted yourself. You’ll feel better when you’ve settled down” 

Peter managed to crawl onto Loki’s lap, straddling him so he could press up against his chest properly. Loki held him as tight as he could without hurting him, rubbing his back firmly.

“I’ve got you, sweetheart” he murmured. “I’ve got you. You’re safe with me. Shh, there now. Shh…”

Somehow, and with a lot of gulping and a little bit of choking, Peter managed to stop crying almost completely. He sniffled and whimpered against Loki’s shoulder, feeling horrible and sick and numb and scared.

“…I don’t know why all that happened”

“It’s alright; you’re calm now. It happens to the best of us” Loki closed his eyes for a moment. The boy might have stopped crying (mostly), but he was obviously still incredibly distressed. “Ok, sweetie, you’re going to feel a little bit funny for a moment or two”

Loki rested his palm against Peter’s forehead, and a few moments later, felt him fall limp in his arms.

“There now” he said softly, setting the sleeping boy down carefully on the bed. 

For a minute or two, he just watched him. He looked rather peaceful, except… Well, his face was still flushed, and there was too much evidence of tears for Loki’s liking. He went and fetched a cool, damp flannel, and carefully bathed and dried the boys face.

“What happened to you today, chick? What’s going on in that funny little head of yours?” 

He put the flannel back, and then spent a few minutes stroking Peter’s curls. After a while, he sighed, and then pressed his palm to Peter’s forehead for a few seconds. Soon enough, Peter stirred and opened his eyes, blinking a little.

“Hello there” Loki smiled gently at him. “How are you feeling?”

Peter glanced round, stretching his arms a little. 

“…Fuzzy”

“Fuzzy?”

Peter nodded. “Yep, fuzzy. But in a good way… Did I faint?”

“No, you just went to sleep for a few minutes” Loki said, truthfully enough.

“Oh. Good, I think I needed that. I don’t think I slept very well last night” 

Peter stretched a little, but stayed on his back, resting one hand on his chest and the other by his head. Loki ran his fingers through Peter’s hair, and Peter seemed to relax even more.

“…I don’t know why I kicked off like I did” he said. “It was like, it happened, and then I couldn’t stop. Like someone else was in control. It was weird. It kinda… It kinda felt like some of those outburst I had just after May died”

“I see…”

“You made me sleep just now, didn’t you?”

Loki nodded.

“Did you ever do it to me back then?”

Loki hesitated. “…Once. It was that night when you couldn’t stop, and you kept being sick…”

“Oh, I remember that one. It wasn’t even like being sick; it was like it just kept dribbling out of me. It didn’t feel like being sick, even though I _felt_ sick, and it burnt my throat”

“You were in a dreadful state. You were dealing with… that… And you had that infection. I’ve never seen you - or anyone else, for that matter - like that. Before or since… I remember Tony crying and saying you were going to break”

Peter didn’t say anything, but he looked away.

“I don’t think you even noticed it happen. I let you sleep for the full effect of it, which is about eight hours. You needed it, and you seemed better when you woke up”

Loki took Peter’s hand in his free one, holding it gently.

“I don’t like thinking about that time” Peter said, squeezing Loki’s hand. “It’s like someone elses memories, and the ones that do feel like mine, I wish didn’t”

“Do you want to talk about something else?”

“Please. I don’t wanna get rid of this fuzzy feeling just yet. I feel good”

“I’m glad” 

They were quiet for a few minutes, with Loki still combing his hand through Peter’s curls.

“Daddy?”

“Yes, chick?”

“I’m really sorry for everything I’ve done today. I don’t know why I did any of it, and I know it was bad and horrible. I’m really- I’m really sorry”

“Thank you” Loki kissed him gently on the nose. “I’m sorry for shouting the way I did”

“It’s ok… Thanks for doing the sleepy thing to me. I feel…”

“Fuzzy?”

Peter smiled. “Yeah. But more than that. I felt awful, and then I woke up, and I felt good. Everything feels soft and warm and nice. Peaceful, yknow?”

“Good”

“Is that what it’s supposed to do?”

“If I do it like that, yes” Loki said. “Now, darling. What do you want to do? Do you want to sleep for a bit?”

Peter looked over at the window. It couldn’t be much later than about five o’ clock. He didn’t really want to waste the rest of the day. He looked back at Loki.

“I wanna go and apologise to Jo Jo”

*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm currently open to requests/ideas for oneshots relating to this series/the relationships in it. If there's anything, any scenario/situation you would like to see, whether related to previous stories or otherwise, please feel free to leave me a comment with your ideas.
> 
> Thanks everyone for reading!


	11. Blues For My Baby And Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Peter's bits in this were really hard to write, so I implore you to use your imaginations, and listen to the listed songs to help with the mood setting/atmosphere of his scenes in this chapter:
> 
> 1 - I Can't Stay Alone Tonight  
> 2 - Hymn 2000  
> 3 - Empty Garden (Hey Hey Johnny)

-

Jo Jo looked understandably wary when Loki and Peter came back downstairs.

“Hi…”

“Peter has something he wants to say”

He gave Peter a gentle push forward. Peter swallowed.

“I… I’m sorry for the way I’ve been today. I’m sorry for being rude and shouting and calling you names and pushing you and all that stuff. I don’t really know why I did it but I know it was bad and unfair. I feel really bad about it. I’m sorry…”

Jo Jo stood up slowly. “Thanks, little guy. I appreciate it. Sorry you’ve been feeling a bit rubbish today. And I’m sorry for nearly smacking you”

Peter nodded, glancing down, and then back up, and down again. Jo Jo fancied he knew what he needed.

“Can I get a hug, little guy?”

Peter looked up and nodded. Jo Jo hugged him, and Peter hugged him back.

“I forgive you” Jo Jo said. “Are you ok now?”

“I think so”

“Good” Jo Jo held him at arms length. “You’re a good little kiddie, really”

Loki lay a hand on Peter’s shoulder. “Good boy. Why don’t you do your own thing for a little bit while Jo Jo and I talk?”

Peter knew it wasn’t really a suggestion, so even though he rather wanted to stay with his dad, he nodded.

Peter went out to the corridor to look through his overnight bag, and suddenly noticed the upright piano opposite the door to the kitchen. It wasn’t anything special; just a regular old wooden one, but it looked well kept. Peter lifted the fall board, looking at the keys. He tapped each one in turn, and then tapped out Mary Had A Little Lamb. It sounded perfectly in tune to him. He pulled out the piano bench, looking up to see if there were any music books on top of the piano. There wasn’t, but there was a little CD player.

Peter went over to his bag. He’d just thrown a random handful of CDs in there, not bothering to look which. Following the theme, he grabbed one of them at random. It turned out to be a homemade compilation of Elton John music - one Peter had forgotten about until that moment. He flipped it over, reading the track listing scrawled on the back paper. He shrugged, double checking the CD player was switched on, and loading the CD. He sat down on the piano bench, making himself comfortable, and clicked the buttons on the CD player, finding the right track. He pressed play, and set his hands on the keys.

-

Jo Jo looked up. “Do you hear that?”

Loki listened for a moment. “Yes..”

They were quiet for a minute or two.

“That’s not just a CD, is it?” Jo Jo said.

“I don’t think so” Loki said, standing up. 

Jo Jo followed, and they went back through to the kitchen diner as quietly as possible, keeping a distance so Peter wouldn’t be distracted by them. They watched him, listening to him playing along to the stereo, and listening to him sing.

“… Bruised in this cold war of words, we’ve come undone, two loose ends alone. Possessed, by that curse you’ve endured, the spell that I cast, couldn’t make you come home”

They moved closer, carefully, leaning against the door frame.

“…Why is it always this way? Time never seems to really fly. And time is never really on my side. And I can’t stay alone tonight. Things have to change, and they might, but I can’t stay alone tonight. Things have to change and they might, but I can’t stay alone tonight”

They stayed quiet, listening to the last few bars as the music faded out into silence.

“Well” Jo Jo said, and Peter jumped. “Ah, sorry! I didn’t mean to make you jump!”

Peter looked at them, pausing the CD, his face flushing. “H-how long have you been stood there?!”

“A minute or so” Jo Jo said. “I didn’t know you could sing!”

“Um…”

“Where did you learn to play the piano like that, young man?” Loki said.

“I-I, um, I just kinda, just kinda made that up. Well, not made it up, but just like, copied what I heard. Like, singing along. But playing along”

“That’s a hell of a skill” Jo Jo said. “Having an ear for music like that is pretty spectacular”

Peter looked down, his cheeks hot.

“I didn’t know you could play anything at all on the piano” Loki said. “Did someone teach you?”

“Well, we’d done a little bit in music at school” Peter said. “And Mr James has been giving me some little lessons too. I can’t read music though: it just doesn’t make any sense to me”

“Instrument music lessons cost extra at St Hendricks, though” Loki said.

“I-uh… I paid for them out of my pocket money”

“Why didn’t you tell us? We’d have been happy to pay, and help you practice”

“Well, I kinda skipped some swim team stuff so I could do it, and I didn’t wanna get into trouble with dad”

“Oh sweetheart” Loki rested a hand on Peter’s shoulders. “It sounds like you’ve got a gift”

“You could be great - better!” Jo Jo said. “Can you play us something else?”

Peter looked at him, and then at Loki, who nodded and stepped back. Peter paused, looking at the listing on the CD case.

“I… I could try this one?”

“Ambitious” Loki said. “Go on, chick. Show us what you can do” 

Peter clicked the skip button on the CD player a few times. He felt a little sick, his hands were shaking, and his heart was thumping with nerves, but he tried to pretend the grown-ups weren’t there. He took a deep breath, sat up straight, pressed play, and got ready to play. Maybe he should have chosen a shorter song.

“Captain Fantastic, raised an’ regimented, hardly a hero. Just someone his mother might know. Very clearly a case for, conflicts and classics. Two teas both with sugar please. In the back of an alley…“

It wasn’t a song Peter had tried playing before, and it wasn’t easy, even though he knew the tune so well, especially as it wasn’t a track where the piano was easily heard. He had a few wobbly notes, and a few times he accidentally caught two keys at once. But, he didn’t think it was bad for a first, nervous try, so he carried on valiantly, trying to lose himself in the story of the song. 

“…For cheap easy meals, hardly a home on the range… Too hot for the band, with a des-perate desire for change.. We’ve thrown in the towel too many times, out for the count an’ when we’re down, Captain Fantastic and the Brown Dirt Cowboy, from the, end of the world to your town..”

The pace was a bit too fast for Peter, and he stumbled over his words a little, but he did the whole five minutes and however many seconds, and then paused the CD player and sat back, turning nervously to Loki and Jo Jo.

“That was a bit fast for me” he admitted.

“You did great!” Jo Jo grinned. “You’re so good! Do another one!”

“Umm…”

“Why don’t I choose?” Loki said, taking the CD box and looking it over. “I’ll choose a shorter one for you”

“Please don’t choose Grey Seal” Peter said. “I’ve never managed singing along to that one”

Loki laughed slightly. “I’ll choose a nice one, don’t worry, chick”

He took his time surveying the list. Peter looked down at his hands, stretching his fingers. It had been a good couple of weeks since he’d played. The only instruments they had at home were Loki’s guitars, which were more ornamental, a decorative horn, and some maracas he’d had as a toddler, so he hadn’t been able to do anything there. He felt a bit rusty, but he did enjoy losing himself in the music.

Loki fiddled with the CD player, selecting a track.

“Ok?” he said.

Peter nodded, readying himself, and Loki pressed play. Peter recognised the track straight away, and couldn’t help smiling.

“She chose the soft scent and, took it to bed with her mother. And the ideal confusion was just an illusion. To gain further news of her bro-ther”

There was something incredible about seeing something new in Peter, Loki thought. He was comfortable, and his playing was fluid. It sounded good, and so did his voice. His style imitated the original to a degree in pronunciation, but was also quite definitely a different take. 

“His styling is _good_ ” Jo Jo said, quietly, so as not to distract Peter.

Loki had to nod in agreement, keeping his eyes on his son. He got a few of the lyrics wrong, but, Loki thought, he could see why he made the mistakes, as some of the lines did sound like something else - and Loki only knew they were wrong for certain because he remembered reading the lyric book of the Empty Sky album. But, it didn’t matter, because it sounded right - and Loki wasn’t going to point out any of his mistakes.

“And I don’t want to be the son of any freak, who for a chocolate centre, can take you off the street. For soon they’ll plough the desert, and God knows where I’ll be. Collecting submarine numbers, on the main street of the sea”

 _It’s incredible_ , Loki thought. _How a song that means so much can mean even more coming from him._

“The Vicar, is _th_ icker, and I just can’t see through the hymn, for his cardinal sings, a collection of hymns, and a collection of coins is made after..”

There was a brief silence after the last few notes were played. They let the next song on the CD play, none of them saying anything. Peter swallowed hard, and turned to the adults.

“I know that one” he said.

“You certainly do!” Jo Jo said. “You’re amazing!”

Peter could feel his face flushing. He wasn’t sure how to take this newfound praise. Music wasn’t something he’d considered being _good_ at: only enjoying. Loki was smiling at him. 

“Do you think you have another one in you?”

“Umm…” Peter took the CD case, looking at the back. “Well… Maybe one more”

Jo Jo stepped closer, looking at the listing. Peter grabbed his drink and took a few mouthfuls, his pulse thumping in his throat. 

“What about this one?” Jo Jo said, pointing.

Peter was quiet for a moment. “I’ve played it quite a lot, so… Ok. But it’s the last one”

“Ok! You give a good show, little guy”

Peter swallowed, turning back and finding the right track on the CD player. He took a deep breath, and looked at Loki.

“You’re not just humouring me, right?”

“Now, sweetheart, when have I ever been known to do that?”

Loki was generally straight to the point, so Peter nodded. He still felt pretty nervous, but this next song was a good five minutes long, and Peter was confident in his ability to play it. It was nice playing piano outside of a St Hendricks practice room, anyway, so he may as well make the most of it. He pressed play on the CD player, grateful for the couple of seconds lag which gave him time to ready himself.

“What happened here? As the New York sunset disappeared, I found an empty gard-en, among the flagstones there. Whooo lived here? He must have been a gardener that cared a lot, who weeded out the tears and grew a good crop. And now it all looks strange. It’s _fun_ ny how one insect, can damage, so much grain…” 

Loki felt like he was watching someone completely different. He felt, strangely, that this was someone he’d never seen before - but at the same time, it was also so undoubtedly his _son_. These words, the way they spilled from the boys mouth, and the way his fingers danced on the ivories…

“…And we are so eh-mazed, we’re _crippled_ and we’re dazed. A gardener like that one, no one can replace. And I’ve been knocking, but no one answers. And I’ve been knocking, most all the day. _Oh_ , and I’ve been calling! Oh, hey hey Johnny! Can’t you come ouuut to play..?”

Loki had always known Peter was deep and expressive, but this - watching him - was so much more than that. The power the small boy was throwing forth, the determination, the feeling, the pure _skill_ , was incredible. How had he overlooked this talent? He supposed he shouldn’t be surprised, but he was. It was obvious Peter was trying to stay true to the original, but even so, his own styling was coming through - as was the extent of his voice when he sang with confidence.

“… _OH_ , and I’ve been calling, _oh_ , hey hey Johnny! Can’t you come out, can’t you come out to play? Johnny, can’t you come out to play, in your empty garden..?”

-

Tony looked at the people round his table. It was incredible how he’d overlooked just how many of the people he worked with - well, that worked for him - were family men. The topic of conversation seemed to have turned to that. Someone had recently had a baby, and so many other had pictures of their children as their phone backgrounds, and they were all sharing and showing. 

“Tony?”

Tony glanced at Pepper, not saying anything. He was grateful for his phone going off, as it gave him an excuse to look away. He opened the message. It was from Loki; a video, simply captioned; ;A;

Tony turned his volume up, hesitated, and then opened the video. He was surprised to see Peter sat in front of a piano. For a moment, he didn’t know what was going on, as the video was too long for it to be some sort of anecdote. But then Peter pressed a button on a CD player, readied his hands on the keys, and began to play - and sing. 

“Is that your kid?” Someone asked, muscling in on his side. “Oh cool, I didn’t know he was musical”

Tony didn’t say anything. He couldn’t take his eyes off the screen. He’d heard Peter sing before, but not like this. And since when could he play the piano?? He was vaguely aware of people babbling, and some crowding round to look at what he was watching. 

Tony knew this song. He remembered Peter making him listen to it and then rambling about it, asking if he knew it was a tribute to John Lennon, and talking about how it made him feel. Tony’s heart was thudding, but he wasn’t sure why. He could tell that Loki had filmed it without Peter knowing. He went to stop the video, but Pepper stopped him. Tony watched the video play out till the very end, where the camera went shaky and stopped as Loki hugged Peter.

For a few moments he was silent, listening to everyone who had seen and heard the video praising his sons voice and playing, praising his talent, asking if he had plans to go big…

Tony looked at Pepper. “…I made that”

“What? Why would Loki send-” Pepper looked at Tony properly. “…Can I borrow you outside for a moment?”

-

The corridor held that familiar strange atmosphere of every empty hallway outside the room of a big event: dim, and echoing, and a little hazy. Pepper took Tony over the other side of the hall, away from the noise of the main hall. She put a hand on his arm.

“Give me your phone”

Tony did as he was told. Pepper found the video again, and hit play. Tony tried to grab his phone back, but Pepper wouldn’t let him; making him listen and watch again. Once the hallway was once again filled with heavy silence, she gave him his phone back.

“What did you say?”

Tony looked at his phone. He clicked the side button, looking at his lock screen photo.

“…I made that”

“Tony”

He looked at her.

“Tell me”

“We did a test…”

There was a pause.

“When did you find out?”

“Yesterday”

“Then why are you here, and not with him?”

Tony took one last look at his phone, and then put it back in his pocket. He leant against the wall, trying to stop his heart from thumping so furiously; trying to breathe steadily, and trying to keep the tears from forming in his eyes.

“Tony, look at me”

Tony didn’t. “I feel… I don’t know. Like an idiot, I guess”

“Do you remember the mother?”

Tony hesitated, and shook his head. Pepper sighed. Tony swallowed, shifting uncomfortably.

“…Are you surprised?”

“Tony, I spent years as your PA” she said. “I’ve shown countless women the door - and that was just the ones you actually brought home. I’m not surprised you don’t remember her”

“No, I mean… Are you surprised he’s… That I’ve got a kid? Like, biologically?”

“Faulty contraception is rare. It’s never something I considered, and, to be honest, if I was going to happen, I would have expected it long before now” she said. “So yes, I am surprised. Even though I’d always seen the resemblance between you two. I just put it down to coincidence”

Pepper waited for Tony to respond, but he didn’t.

“What does this mean? What are you going to do?”

“…I don’t know”

“What do you want to do?”

“Get drunk”

“And what are you _actually_ going to do?”

“…Go to bed”

“I’ll walk you up”

It was a quiet walk up to Tony’s hotel room. Tony thanked Pepper, and just before he closed the door, he looked at her properly for the first time that evening.

“You won’t tell anyone, will you?”

“Of course not” Pepper said. “Trust me. I’m not telling anyone”

-

Peter sighed and set his phone down. He’d called Tony five times in a row, with no answer. He supposed it was getting kinda late - maybe he was in bed. Peter knew he should be calling it a night, too. After the friction of the first part of the day, Peter had had a good afternoon. They’d gone for another walk, and then had tea in a nearby bar/restaurant. They’d spent an hour or so playing card and board games when they got back, and then Loki had told Peter to have a shower and go to bed. 

But, Peter had left his drink downstairs, so he went to get it - but paused on the stairs. He could hear Loki and Jo Jo talking, and they sounded serious.

“So what’s up, really?” Jo Jo said, flopping back beside Loki on the sofa.

“What do you mean?”

“With Peter” Jo Jo said. “I know everything blew over, but something was definitely up this morning”

“What does it matter? He’s better now” Loki said, sounding cagey. 

“You’re off today, too. You haven’t been your usual self”

“You’re being ridiculous”

“I’m not. Don’t lie to me, Lokes. I’ve known you long enough to know when something’s not right. Come on, you can tell me”

Loki looked at Jo Jo. He was right; something was wrong. Loki knew him well enough to know he could be trusted - and Loki just had to tell someone. He was usually ok with keeping things to himself - or just within the family - but this was different. It had been praying on his mind all day…

Peter wasn’t surprised. He didn’t feel great about it, but he understood why Loki had told Jo Jo. Whatever they might all be thinking and feeling, Peter knew that there was no way this was going to stay secret forever, whether he liked it or not. He wasn’t sure yet. But all of a sudden he didn’t need his drink anymore. 

He crept back up to the bedroom, closing the door quietly behind him. He crawled into bed, pulling his toy seal close and resting his head on it. He felt ok. He knew he should make the most of it while it lasted.

*


	12. Blood And Water

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this update took so long! I'm an essential worker and we've been short-staffed so I've been doing like, double my contracted hours (I'm usually part-time), so I've been pretty busy, etc. etc. Hope you're all staying well, and thanks to anyone still reading!

-

After a lazy morning and a long walk, Jo Jo dropped Loki and Peter off at the house. Jo Jo had put on a CD for the journey, which was hugely preferable to just listening to the grown-ups hospital talk.

“You like ABBA?” Peter said, surprised.

“Of course I like ABBA - I’m Swedish!” Jo Jo laughed.

“ _And_ you’re gay” Loki said.

The journey home seemed much faster than the journey there. It was almost a disappointment when they arrived back at the house.

“Shame we only had the one night” Jo Jo said. 

“We’ll do a full weekend some time, I promise” Loki said, giving him a hug and a kiss. He lowered his voice. “Without the baby, next time”

“Thanks, Jo Jo” Peter said, leaning over from the back seat and hugging him. “Sorry again for yesterday morning”

“Hey, no worries, little guy” Jo Jo said, giving him a little hug back. “See you at the hospital some time soon? _Not_ as a patient, though! Be good for your daddies”

“Ok. Bye, Jo Jo!”

-

Peter still felt pretty good. He’d slept well, and enjoyed his morning. He went and unpacked his bag, sorting everything out properly, and then flopped on his bed, and soon drifted off to sleep.

He woke up an hour or so later, feeling fuzzy and warm, with the sun beaming in through the window. He rubbed his eyes and got up, wandering about the landing. Tony’s keys were still missing from their hook. It was nearly three o’ clock, so Peter was surprised to see he wasn’t back yet. But he supposed he had his reasons.

-

Peter tugged on Loki’s sleeve to get his attention.

“Sweetheart, can’t you see I’m a little busy?” Loki said.

“Sorry. I just wanna ask you something”

“Uh-huh” Loki said, focusing on the light he was fixing. “Do I have to do anything?”

“Just answer”

“Ok. What is it?”

“When’s dad home?”

“I don’t know. Go and get some milk”

Peter went over to the fridge and opened the door.

“We don’t have any in”

“I know. Go to the shop”

Peter pouted. 

“Get yourself some sweets, too”

“Ok, ok” Peter said. “Anything else?”

“No. Run along now, chick”

Peter nodded and went to get his shoes on. A little afternoon stroll sounded like a nice idea.

-

Peter went down to the little shop on the corner. The dim interior was a stark contrast to the bright sun outside, but it was comfortably familiar. 

“Hey, baby Stark!” the shopkeeper said, nodding at him from behind the till.

“Hey, mister” 

Peter had first met him during the first summer he’d spent at the Stark’s. He still didn’t know his name after all this years, but they always nodded at each other when they crossed in the street, and greeted each other when Peter came into the shop. They never really spoke _properly_ , largely due to the cultural difference and the fact the shopkeepers English was a little shaky and Peter always felt bad if he didn’t quite understand what he was saying. Peter knew some of his children, and they’d been here since they were tiny, and gone to school nearby, so they were fluent and he didn’t have the same problem with them. They were all a fair bit older than Peter, but they all talked to him quite happily if they were serving in the shop, although Peter always felt like they saw him as a lot younger than he actually was.

Peter grabbed the milk and then took his time deciding what to get for himself. He had a look through the housekeeping purse, counting the coins. He’d just grabbed it on his way out without checking, but luckily there was a decent amount in it. He eventually settled on a bottle of blue Fanta, a handful of sherbet straws, a little pack of popping candy, some fruit gums, a bar of dark chocolate, and a bag of jelly snakes.

“Too many sweets” the shopkeeper said, sifting through Peter’s choices at the till. “Bad for your teeth”

“Well, daddy told me to get some sweets, so I guess it’s ok this time” Peter said, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. “I’ll just brush my teeth an extra time today…”

He looked at the little display by the till, and added a couple of lollipops to his stack. 

“Too many sweets!” the shopkeeper repeated. “You kids!”

Peter just smiled, and looked up when the shop door opened again with its accompanying ring of the bell. It was one of the shopkeepers sons, balancing a couple of boxes in his arms.

“Hey, Stark” he said, winking at Peter as he passed him by.

“Hey…”

“Eight forty-two” the shopkeeper said, grabbing his attention. 

“Oh right, yeah” Peter counted out nine dollars and handed the coins over. “There’s nine”

The shopkeeper handed him the change, and Peter took his shopping bag.

“Thanks, mister. See you later”

“Bye, baby Stark. Don’t eat everything now!”

“I won’t, mister. Bye!”

Peter stepped back into the daylight and let the door jangle shut behind him. He dug his hand in the bag, found a lolly, pulled the wrapper off, and stuck it in his mouth. He jumped down the step to the pavement, blinking a little. He knew he should have brought his sunglasses.

-

“Jesus, Peter!” Loki said, looking at the pile of sweets Peter had tipped onto the table. “When I told you to get yourself some sweets, I was thinking just a packet, not the whole shop!”

“I had a craving” Peter said, putting his lolly stick in the bin.

“Hmm” Loki looked disapproving. He sighed. “Who was in today?”

“Hm? Oh, just the owner” Peter said, opening his drink. “Oh, and I saw one of the boys briefly”

“Oh yeah, which one? What day is it? Was it Aamir?”

“I don’t know” Peter said. “It was the tall one with the neck tattoo”

“Aamir” Loki nodded. “His wife’s expecting, you know. I saw him in clinic a few weeks ago”

“Oh, cool. I didn’t know he was married”

“All the boys are” Loki said. “It’s only Hansamala who isn’t married”

“I like her” Peter said, sifting through his sweets. “She gives me those pink sweets, those ones it takes days to get through”

“Mm, she gave me one once” Loki said. “I’ve never had anything so sweet before. Or since. It wasn’t really my cup of tea”

“She calls me Tuka”

“It means young boy” Loki said.

“Oh. Well, that makes sense, I guess. How old is she, anyway?”

“God, I don’t know” Loki said. “Mid thirties? Say, you’re not eating all of those, are you?”

Peter looked up from his sherbet straws. “Why? Do you want one?”

“Not especially. They just remind me of the kids of Scotland who used to snort them for a dare” Loki said, and then shot him a look. “Don’t even think about it!”

“I wasn’t! People at Midtown went through a stage of doing that. It made one kids nose bleed. I’m not gonna waste it like that”

“Mm. Even so, you don’t need all those sweets now. Choose what you want now, and put the rest away for later”

“Aww, that’s no fun” Peter pouted, putting an arm protectively around his hoard.

“Peter” Loki pressed. “Do as you’re told”

Peter sighed in an exaggerated fashion. “Oh, woe is me! Alright, I’ll just have the jelly snakes and the popping candy now. And one of the sherbet straws. Oh, and-”

“Nope, three things is enough! Technically it’s more than that, looking at those jelly snakes” Loki raised an eyebrow. “You’re lucky your dad’s not home yet; he’d go spare”

“Aww, he’s even worse than me when it comes to this kind of thing” Peter said, brushing it off.

“Mm” Loki took the rest of Peter’s sweets and put them on the top shelf of one of the cupboards. “Well, maybe you should go and settle down with a DVD or something”

“Can I play on the Wii for a bit?”

“Peter, you haven’t played with that for three and a half years”

“I know, but we’ve still got all the stuff. Wanna play Mario Kart? Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease?!”

“Alright, alright! Fine, but only for half an hour. It’ll make you put those sweets down, anyway”

Peter offered him the bag. “Want one?”

“I’ll pass. Dearie me, what’s wrong with battling for a chocolate coin from a tower of flour? I can understand where your father’s coming from sometimes”

“Huh?”

“It’s a game, one I was introduced to in Scotland. Basically you fill a bowl-”

“Wait” Peter interrupted, his ears pricking up. “Did you hear that? I think dad’s back”

He went rushing off, and Loki sighed. 

“I’ll tell you later then, shall I?”

He shook his head and followed after his son.

-

Peter’s ears hadn’t deceived him. Tony hugged Loki first, holding as tight as he could.

“Did you miss me?” Loki said, squeezing him back.

“Always, my darling” Tony said. “Right, where’s my little boy?”

He pulled back, and turned to Peter. Peter watched him cautiously. Suddenly all his reservations had caught up with him. He couldn’t help feeling upset that Tony hadn’t answered any of his calls or texts, and he still felt a little sore over what had happened the other day. He wasn’t quite sure where he stood now.

Tony smiled. “There he is! Come here, fella: haven’t you got a hug for your old man?”

Peter hesitantly held his arms out, and Tony pulled him close and squeezed him tight.

“My little boy! Ooh, I missed you, you know!” he looked at Loki. “Was he good?”

Peter tensed, looking over his shoulder.

“As gold” Loki said.

“Good” 

Peter looked back up at Tony, who kissed him on the nose.

“Daddy sent me a video of you singing. I didn’t know you could play the piano!”

Peter looked over his shoulder at Loki again, who just nodded slightly.

“You’re a clever little kid” Tony said, kissing the bridge of Peter’s nose and then resting a hand on the back of the boys head, holding him tighter still.

His hold was so warm, so secure - and Peter felt good. 

_He still loves me,_ Peter thought, snuggling into his father’s chest. _He still loves me!_

_-_

Loki sat on the armchair, rubbing the space above his lip with the side of his forefinger, watching Tony and Peter together. To all intents and purposes, Peter looked happy, curled up against his father, starting to drift off. Tony looked happy too, cradling the boy in his arms. But, Loki thought, there was something off about it. He wasn’t entirely sure what, but something wasn’t quite right. 

Loki opened the drawer of the little lamp table closest to him, getting out his pipe and tobacco tin. He barely took his eyes off his husband and son the whole while he was readying it. It was only a few seconds after he lit it that Tony looked up.

“Oh, Loki, darling” he said. “Not while the kid’s in here”

“Of course” Loki said slowly. He paused, and then stood up. “I’ll be out on the balcony”

Loki leant against the railing, tapping the ceramic of his pipe against his teeth in between puffs. As much as he’d love to believe that the DNA test results hadn’t made any difference, he just didn’t buy it. He was, in part, relieved that Tony had come home and immediately started showing Peter the usual attention. It wasn’t that it seemed forced - it didn’t - but there was definitely something different. 

Loki looked down at the lights of the street below, and the traffic in the distance. If he squinted, he could just about see the hospital. He thought about everyone on the ward. He felt such fondness for that place. He didn’t always understand why. He had many regrets in life - starting at the hospital wasn’t one of them. Thor said it was his way of recompense, but Loki didn’t buy that. He’d originally started at the hospital under another persons recommendation, and even then he’d only really gone because he had a newfound interest of human health after something Tony had shown him. He hadn’t expected to get sucked in quite like he did, much less end up as a fully-qualified nurse. But, despite everything, he still loved doing it. It still interested him, and he’d grown to love his colleagues, and care for his patients. Perhaps it was keeping busy. Whatever.

Loki sucked on his pipe, turning his thoughts back to his family. He thought hard, and then something suddenly clicked. He stopped, thinking it over again, and then nodded. He set his pipe down on the glass table between the two chairs. He needed to keep an eye on things.

-

“Are you off?” Loki said, stopping Tony in his tracks.

Tony turned to him, adjusting his hold on Peter. “He’s dropped off, and it’s kinda late. Probably a good idea to settle him down”

“I can take him”

“It’s ok; I’ll do it”

“Why don’t you get him a jug?” Loki suggested.

Tony hesitated, and then let Loki take Peter from him. “Alright. I’ll just be a few minutes”

Peter had his eyes open when Loki put him down on the bed.

“…You weren’t really asleep, were you?”

Peter shook his head. “Don’t tell dad, alright?”

Loki nodded slightly. “…Are you ok?”

“I think so. Dad’s better with me than he was the other day. I think he’s ok about everything now”

“Mm”

“Hey, daddy?”

“Yes?”

“Can I get up? I don’t really wanna go to bed in my clothes”

“Hm? Oh, of course. Sorry” He moved back.

“It’s alright” Peter said, getting up and pulling his shirt off. “Are you having another flare-up?”

Loki looked at him. “What makes you say that?”

“You’ve been all quiet this evening, and you kinda looked like you were zoning out. I wondered if you were getting ill”

“I’m fine” Loki said.

“Right, here’s the jug” Tony said, bursting into the room. “Oh, you’re awake”

“I’m gonna go and do my teeth” Peter said. “…Can you two stop acting so weird?”

He locked the en suite door behind him. Loki was _definitely_ acting strange, and the way Tony had looked was a little funny too. He hoped they’d get the hint and leave him to it. He didn’t really want to be put to bed by them tonight. They probably had stuff to talk about anyway.

-

“I know what’s going on here” Loki said after they’d closed Peter’s door behind them.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” Tony said, carrying on down the hallway. “Hey, now the kids asleep, do you wanna spend some quality time together?”

“And do what?”

“I don’t know” Tony shrugged absentmindedly. “Have sex?”

“Tony-”

“Alright, not full sex. But if you’re in the mood, I’m more than happy to give you an orgasm tonight”

“Tony, stop it” Loki said firmly. “I think we need to talk”

“What about? I’ve got nothing to say. The conference was alright. How was your day away?“

“Fine. That’s not what we’re here to talk about”

“Well, _what_ , then?”

“You _know_ what!”

Tony did know, but that didn’t mean he’d admit it, much less talk about it. 

“Don’t give me that look!” Loki sighed irritably. “You can’t gloss over it forever! I _knew_ there was something off with you and the way you were with Peter, an-”

“Hey, I haven’t been ‘off’” Tony scowled. “I was just as dad-ish as ever with him”

“You didn’t speak to him, n-”

“Yes I did! We’ve been talking all night!”

“Talking without saying anything. You can’t ignore the DNA results. You can’t pretend you don’t have to talk about this”

“I _don’t_ have to talk about it!”

“Yes, you do! Not wanting to talk about it doesn’t mean you don’t need to talk about it. Peter needs to talk about it, too. You both need to discuss it properly, and- NO, DON’T INTERRUPT ME! Don’t try throwing excuses my way either. I’m not going to make you wake him up now, but you _are_ going to talk to him, one way or another. I won’t let you weasel out of this”

“…What is there to talk about?”

“For crying out loud, Anthony!” Loki turned on his heel. “I’m going to bed, and I don’t want to talk to you until you’ve seen sense and are ready to act your age”

“Wait, Loki!”

Loki stopped and looked at him. “What?”

“Do you want an orgasm tonight or not?”

-

Peter stayed quiet when there was a knock on his door. He stayed quiet when his bedroom door opened. He stayed quiet and still when the bedside lamp was turned on and someone sat down on his bed.

“I know you’re awake, chick”

Peter still didn’t move. They rested a hand on his shoulder and gave him a little shake.

“You can’t fool me, kiddo”

Peter opened his eyes. “What do you want?”

“I want you to be honest. I know you’re having a tough time”

“Daddy, I’m tired. All those car journeys tire me out”

“That’s not what I said”

“I know, but honestly, I’m fine. Dad’s the one in denial; not me. He’s being nice to me though, so that’s something”

“Well-”

“Hey, daddy? I’m kinda ready to go to sleep now. I’m doing ok, and I’ll be even better when my eyes don’t sting any more”

“Your eyes sting?”

“I’m _tired_! I _said_ that. Goodnight”

“Ok, ok” Loki kissed Peter on the cheek. “Alright. Goodnight, chick”

Peter watched him leave, and then breathed out. He had a feeling Loki was taking this whole thing a lot harder than he was.

*


	13. Young Man's Blues

-

Peter took advantage of his healthy bank account and finally splashed out on something big. He was up early, checking up on the tracking app, sitting at the bottom of the stairs to make sure he got the door before his parents did. Sure, Tony had always said he could spend his money on whatever he wanted (within reason and legality), but he still had a feeling they’d both have something to say about what he’d ordered - and not necessarily something good.

-

“Uh, what’s going on here?!”

Peter jumped. He hadn’t realised Tony had been in the lab all this time.

“…Just taking a delivery” Peter said, signing the form and letting the delivery men go.

He closed the front door and turned to his father. 

“Anyway, good morning”

“Do you not think that maybe you should have consulted me before buying something like this?”

“Well, it was a special deal - next day delivery. And anyway, you’re always saying my money is mine to spend”

“Well, yes, but-”

“I’ll send it back if you want me to”

“No, no. That’s not necessary” Tony looked at the black Yamaha upright piano. “How much did it cost?”

“…Just shy of seven thousand dollars”

“Oh, nice. Why didn’t you get a grand piano?”

“Because they were like, forty-five thousand dollars! This was expensive enough. And anyway, this one will be easier to fit somewhere. I mean, maybe if I had a music room, I’d’ve got a bigger one”

“Are you hinting?”

Peter shrugged. “I’m not a big musician. I just fancied one of these. It was cool playing it the other day, like, while I was away? I’d only ever played at school. So… Can I keep it?”

“Of course you can! Look, that video your father sent me was great, and it’s plain to see that you’re a real talent. Where are you going to put it?”

“Well, there’s room here, by the stairs” Peter said, gesturing to the cabinet under the banister. “Well, if we moved that”

“No, leave it! Don’t go moving furniture” Tony sighed. “Maybe you should move it upstairs, kiddo. Up in the corridor or something”

“Ok. Can you give me a hand?”

“No way; I’m not juggling a piano. Why don’t you get your father?”

“I think he’s still asleep”

“He’s in the laundry room”

“Oh. Ok, I’ll… Wait, dad?”

“Mm?”

“You still love me, right?”

Tony sighed irritably. “Don’t ask silly questions, Peter”

“Can we talk later? Properly?”

“I thought you were getting your father?”

Peter sighed heavily and went off to get Loki. He supposed talking to Tony would have to wait.

-

Moving a piano wasn’t too much of a strain for a god and an enhanced teenager to manage. They found a good spot for it in the corridor outside the back room. It was a wide enough corridor for it to fit comfortably, with plenty of room to spare for anyone passing. Once it was positioned, Loki lifted the fall board and tapped a few keys.

“Well, this is your forte” he said. “I’ll leave you to sort the rest of it”

“Hey, daddy?”

“What?”

“Are you and dad fighting?”

“Why would you say that?”

“I need to know”

Loki sighed. “No, we’re not fighting. We’re just not each others biggest fans right now. Or, at least, I’m not his. Set your piano up and mind your own business”

Peter scowled at his fathers back, but sighed and looked at his piano. It was even prettier in person than it had been on the listing. It was so sleek and perfect and professional-looking - so much so, that he felt like he shouldn’t touch it, let alone play it. It was very much something to be treated with respect, he thought. Something decorative… But he’d bought it to _play_. Although… Well, maybe he should test it out…

-

“He was your responsibility - you should have talked some sense into him”

“ _I_ didn’t know he was buying a piano, did I? And so what? You said yourself that he’s talented”

“That doesn’t mean he can just do as he pleases!”

“Anthony, you’re _always_ whining about him having money anxiety. He’s just splashed some cash - see it as progress. At least he’s spent it on something useful and sensible”

“You’re deliberately missing my point”

“You don’t _have_ a point:- you’re just kicking off for no reason. Leave the kid alone. Sort out your own problems before taking it out on him”

“I’m _not_ taking it out on him! Anyway, what if he never uses it? He’s already given up the lab, and he’s been trying to give up swimming for ages! Not to mention that steep downwards spiral in Spiderman activity.”

“He gave up the lab because he was majorly depressed and traumatised, remember? Spiderman was much the same, and anyway, he still does that on at least a weekly basis. You can;t; whine about that, because you used to whine when he was out in his suit every day. It’s like he can’t win. And, he’s _never_ enjoyed swim team, not really - although of course you never want to listen to him when he tries to tell you about that, do you?” Loki said scornfully. “Give him a break. He bought it for a reason, and he’s probably using it as we speak”

“We’ll see about that” Tony said, pushing past him. 

Loki closed his eyes for a moment, trying to stay calm, and then followed him. Peter might need a bit of protection.

-

Peter could have heard Tony shouting from a mile off, so he stopped playing and turned round in his seat, folding his arms over his chest. Tony was visibly taken aback when he turned the corner and saw him there. 

“…What?”

“I assume you’ve come to shout at me?”

Tony didn’t know what to say to that, which as a great relief for Peter. 

“What time is Li Allen coming?” he asked quickly.

“What?” Tony looked at Loki. “Is that today?”

“Yes. One ‘o clock” Loki said. “Perhaps if you have a shower and something to eat you’ll feel a little less confrontational for when she gets here”

“Fine!” Tony said. “I’m going to my room then, if you’re going to be like that”

Peter waited until he heard the door slam, and then looked at Loki.

“I might be wrong, but I was under the impression that it was _my_ job to kick off and slam doors”

“Don’t even think about it, chick” Loki sighed. “If he’s going to be like that, we need to pick up the slack. Li Allen has dealt with enough from us without all three of us kicking off”

Peter shrugged, turning back to the piano. “Well, until he shouts at me to stop the racket, I’m gonna be here”

“Have you had anything to eat today?”

“No, but-”

“But nothing. Come on; you need to eat”

“I’ll get something in a bit”

“No, you’ll get something now. That’s not a suggestion”

Peter sighed, and closed the fall board. There was enough tension in the house without him causing an argument with Loki.

-

Tony came in for something to eat just as Peter was finishing. He ran his hand through his wet hair, grumbling to himself. Loki made a comment, and Tony made a harsher one back. Within thirty seconds, they’d started arguing, and thirty seconds after that, it got serious. Peter carefully slipped out of the room, not that either of them noticed. His parents rarely argued properly, which just made it all that much worse when they did exchange cross words. He didn’t want to stick around to hear what they had to say. They could both be seriously nasty when they wanted to be.

Peter grabbed his MP3 and put his headphones over his ears so he couldn’t hear them. He went down to the back room, but stopped at the door, looking at the piano, which seemed to be the catalyst for the argument going on in the kitchen. He wanted to regret buying it, but he didn’t. He took his hand off the back room door handle and instead went and sat down at the piano. He lifted the fall board and ran his fingers over the keys gently, just enough to feel how cool and smooth they were. It felt good finally having one in the house. He was surprised, with Tony’s very public wealth, that there hadn’t been one in the house already. It seemed to be one of those things that every rich people had. Even Millie and Flo had a piano at home, and no one in either of their families knew how to play so much as three consecutive notes. 

He set his MP3 on the edge of the piano, scrolling through to find a decent playlist. He let it play, and placed his hands on the piano keys and started to play, humming along at first, and then singing, softly, so that he could hardly hear himself over his playing, and the music in his headphones.

“Too late, to save myself from falling.. I took a chance, and changed your way of life.. But you misread, my meaning when I met you.. Closed the door, and left me blind, by the light..”

Peter could tell just from the way it felt how good the piano was. It seemed to make everything easier. Maybe he was clouded by bias, or pride, or just the situation which had led him to play, but everything flowed so well.  
  
“Don’t let the sun go down on me. Although I search myself, it’s always someone else I see.. I’d just allow a fragment of your life, to wander free… But losing everything, is like the sun going down on me”

Peter closed his eyes. He knew the keys well enough to do it without looking. It helped, too: it meant he was fully encased in the music, and everything else was blocked out. Soon enough, he forgot about his parents, about the shouting, about the tension, about the DNA test…  
  
“I can’t find, ooh the right romantic line. But see me once, and see the way I feel. Don’t discard me, just because you think I mean you harm. But these cuts I have, oh, they need love, to help them heal…”

-

With everything else blocked out, there was nothing to stop him. For a while he nearly forgot who he was. On the one hand, he _could_ be Peter Benjamin Parker-Stark, once orphaned, Spider-man, traumatised, ill, smart, but not living up to his true potential, suffering with selective mutism, prone to overreacting, not always sure who he was and how he felt. But, on the other hand, he could be someone else; someone who didn’t exist yet. An alter-ego, or perhaps a person - a personality - he could adopt. A mixture of great people, of great talent - someone ordinary, but with extraordinary skill and talent. He _wasn’t_ \- but at the same time, what was stopping him from being that? Or at least, just pretending he was…

So he kept singing. He kept playing. He had a safe playlist on, and he played whatever came on, regardless of how complex it was to play, or sing. He didn’t always get it right, but it didn’t matter, because he couldn’t hear properly, and even if he could, he felt great. He didn’t feel like _him_. He didn’t feel scared, worried about his parents, his _parentage_ , his school and friends. He felt like someone else entirely, like… well, like he’d changed. Maybe he _was_ someone else here. Who knows? And if he was, who was he to argue with that? Since May’s death, he hadn’t felt great all that often, and he was fully committed to taking full advantage of any time he did feel good. No questions asked.

-

Peter stopped abruptly. He hesitated, and then pushed his headphones down round his neck.

“…Hi”

“Hello, you” Li Allen said. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you jump”

“It’s ok” Peter said. “Pausing my MP3 is far from being the worst way to get my attention”

“It’s been a long time since we’ve seen each other”

“A few months” Peter nodded, turning round on his seat. “I’ve kinda missed you, you know”

“That’s sweet” Li said, sitting down beside him. “We’ve known each other a long time now”

“I guess we’ve been through a lot together. Even if some of it was stuff you didn’t hear about until afterwards” he looked at her. “…I guess you’ve talked to my parents?”

“Yes”

“I guess you’ve been told?”

“Yes”

“What do you think about it?”

“Now, that’s what I should be asking you” Li said, putting an arm round his shoulders. “You had some impressive playing and singing going on just then, but your song choice gives a lot away”

“Well… You know, Macy once asked me to recommend some happy Elton John songs to her, and you know, to be honest, there _isn’t_ all that many. There’s loads more sadder ones. And neutral ones, I guess. He’s emotional. So maybe it’s just coincidence”

“I don’t believe you for a second. I know you too well; I can tell when you’re spinning a story”

“Well, ok” Peter admitted. “I wasn’t lying about the Macy bit, though”

“I know. Now I think you need to answer my question”

Peter went quiet. He glanced back at the piano keys. 

“Why don’t we go somewhere a bit more comfortable?” Li suggested.

Peter took his headphones off and set them down carefully. “I’m ok here”

“Ok. Now, do you have anything to say to me? I can imagine how much of a shock this news was to you, and I can see the effect it’s having on your parents”

“I was thinking of you earlier, you know” Peter said. “About right back when we first met, and how I was, and how you had the same perfume as May, and how weak I was”

“You weren’t weak, Peter” Li said, gently. “Far from it. You were just very, very sad, and very sick”

“I _feel_ sick if I think about it too much. But at least I’m not living it anymore. It was a horrible year. Finding out Tony Stark is my bio-dad is nothing compared to a lot of stuff I’ve been through”

“That doesn’t mean it hasn’t had an effect on you”

“Well, maybe, but I don’t know what that is yet, not really. I mean, he won’t even talk to me about it, so I don’t know how I’m supposed to figure it out. I mean, I _know_ he’s not gonna remember my mother, but I didn’t expect him to. But that doesn’t mean he can’t answer some questions, you know? I mean, imagine if he’d always known about me. I’d’ve grown up in this huge house, and I’d’ve been at schools like St Hendricks my whole life, and I’d probably be a completely different person. If he’d stepped up, anyway”

“What makes you say that?”

“Well, he’s not always been a family man. I know he was a right twat back in the day. Like, back when I was a really little kid, like, back before Iron Man and all that stuff. He’s still a bit of a twat now… He might have just told my mum that it was her problem, and refused to have anything to do with me” Peter said. “I mean, I’ve read the articles, and I’ve heard the stories, and I don’t know if I can imagine him in his playboy, parties, super-super-ego, look-how-great-I-am days being happy about having a kid. I mean, knowing what he was like, can you imagine him doing the honourable thing?”

“Parenthood can change people, whether the kid was planned or not. Sure, he might have run a mile, but there’s no guarantee. Maybe he’d have been given a shock, and wanted to step up. Maybe he’d have said he’d just pay for upkeep but having nothing to do with the baby, but then change his mind when you were born. It’s a reality we’re not living, so we’re never going to know. The important thing is; he stepped up for you, regardless. Now it turns out you’ve been flesh and blood all along. That’s got to be a shock to the system”

“You know, I think it would have been weird growing up famous. I mean, you remember when I got turned into a toddler, that whole Kindsprengen thing? I remember loads of that, and I remember it being scary when people crowded us in public and stuff”

“I think the hype of your story may have intensified that. But I see where you’re coming from. Still, you’ve been a celebrities son for a long time now”

“I sometimes wish I had someone to share it with. Like, if the IVF… If all that stuff had gone through, I’d’ve ended up with a sibling. Someone who understood and could share the whole thing with me, you know?”

“I can imagine it being strange and tough sometimes. Do you get lonely?”

“No, not really. I’ve started drifting off into my own little world a lot lately. And anyway, I’m friends with my parents, so that helps. If I didn’t get on with them, I guess I would feel lonely a lot more” he paused for a moment. “…I’m thinking of being a toddler now”

“The first time round?”

Peter shook his head. “I don’t remember that. No, I mean the Kindsprengen thing. It’s funny how much I remember sometimes. I keep meaning to write it down, but I always get distracted after a few paragraphs… I kinda feel like I did then”

“In what way?”

“Well, at the start, it was just daddy Loki looking after me, because dad was all scared or in denial or whatever, and he wouldn’t have anything to do with me, and he wouldn’t talk to me or pay proper attention to me… I remember being so confused and upset about it… Anyway, he won’t talk to me properly now - not about what we actually _need_ to talk about, anyway. Daddy’s been real good, mostly, but dad hasn’t, and he’s the one I need more right now. It’s the same kinda like, segregation, I guess”

“Do you think he’s in denial again now?”

“…I’m not sure. I think he’s trying to pretend none of this is happening, like, pretend that it hasn’t changed anything. How was he when you spoke to him?”

Li paused. “…Tense. Both of them were. Let’s just say I took the first chance to slip away to come to talk to you. I wanted to check you were ok”

“Are they arguing again?”

Li nodded. “I’m afraid so”

“They’ve been at it all day” Peter looked back at his headphones and MP3. “I think this set it off”

“What?”

“The piano” Peter said. “It arrived this morning. There was a mixed reaction. I bought it myself. I guess I just wanted one”

“How long have you been playing?”

“About eight months. I’ve been paying for lessons at school. I didn’t tell anyone, but I went away with daddy and his friend the other day, and there was a piano there and I started playing it, and daddy sent a video to dad, so they know now. I don’t know exactly what they thought. I think dad would be pretty angry if he knew I’d skipped swim practice a lot to do it. Not that it really matters, since I’m not at school right now”

“Your parents mentioned home schooling again today. How do you feel about that?”

“I don’t really care” Peter said. “Not right now, anyway”

“What _do_ you care about right now?”

“My piano” Peter said. “It’s so pretty right? It feels great actually being able to practice at home now”

“How were you playing all those songs?” Li asked, glancing behind them. “You don’t have any books or chords there”

“I can’t read music. My teacher tried to teach me, but I just don’t get it, so I don’t really use sheet music” Peter said. “I just play it by ear”

“That’s incredible. Not many people can do it, especially not as well as I heard you doing it”

Peter shrugged. “Well, it’s just like singing along, but playing along. I know I was kinda doing both, but you know what I mean, right?”

“I understand, yes. I’m glad you’ve discovered a new skill. But I don’t understand why you’ve kept it to yourself for so long”

“I guess I was worried what people would say about it, and think about it. Especially dad. Because of missing swim practice and stuff. You know what he’s like about swim team”

“Perhaps, with everything being out in the open, you should tell him that you want to quit. You’ve been miserable in your competitive swimming for far too long”

“No way” Peter said. “I got spanked last time I told him I hated it and wanted to step down. Well, actually, we did have an argument too, which I guess didn’t help. That was a pretty long time ago, anyway, and he hasn’t spanked me since the whole Kindsprengen fiasco, and I’m not really in a rush to break that streak”

“I don’t blame you” Li sighed. “It’s sad that you can’t talk about it with him. What about Loki?”

“He gets it, but dad won’t listen to him, either. They’ve argued about it a few times. They’ve been arguing a lot more recently, so I’m not about to bring that up and risk them having another barney because of it”

“I noticed the tension even before they started arguing. I assumed it was because of the test results”

“I wish it was” Peter sighed. “I don’t know what’s been up with them, but they’ve kinda been locking horns a lot these last couple of months. They usually try to keep all that stuff from me, but I have a feeling dad just keeps winding daddy up. It might be on purpose”

“Why do you think it might be on purpose?”

Peter shrugged. “You know, it’s good they try to keep me out of all that kinda stuff, but there’s a bunch of stuff they do that give away if they’re cross with each other. Tell-tale signs, you know?”

“I see. Do you have any examples?”

Peter shrugged again. “Not really. It’s all kinda stuff you shouldn’t notice, but do, you know? Like, it’s all kinda little things… Hey, can I ask you, like, a theoretical question?”

“Shoot”

“What would happen to me if they split up? Like, would dad get me because he’s blood?”

“Loki and Tony adopted you, and regardless of the results of the paternity test, in the eyes of the law, they’re both equally responsible - they’re equal parents to you”

“So, what would happen?”

“It would be up to your parents, or the courts if they couldn’t come to an agreement” Li said. “But, sweetheart, I don’t think you should think about that. I can’t see your parents splitting up, even if they’re having a rocky patch”

“Yeah, I guess so. This is nowhere near as rocky as it was when I first met daddy Loki, and they got through that nightmare” Peter sighed. “It’s just weird when they’re not getting on properly. I think daddy’s pretty upset about all this, too”

“They’ll get through it, kiddo” Li said, giving him a little squeeze. “Maybe they just have a lot to get out of their systems… Is that why you’re hiding back here?”

“Yeah, I was blocking out the shouting. At least, I was at first, but then I just kinda got really into the music”

Li smiled. “There’s nothing wrong with a bit of escape. Now, do you want to come through to the living room, so all four of us can talk?”

Peter went quiet, listening hard. “…I think they’ve stopped arguing, so… I guess so. I’d rather stay here, though”

“There’s nothing stopping you coming back afterwards, but I do need to talk to you all as a family”

“I know, I get it” Peter sighed, standing up. “Well, may as well get it over with”

-

Tony and Loki seemed to have calmed down a bit, but Peter stayed on high alert anyway, just in case. 

“I take it you haven’t done a press release yet?” Li said.

“It’s no one else’s business” Tony snapped. “Sorry. But it isn’t”

“People will find out sooner or later” Loki said.

“Not if no one tells them”

“You’ve told more people than I have” Loki pointed out.

“Barely!”

“You have! I only told Jo Jo. You told all your little superhero friends, and Pepper, and-”

“Ok, ok, point taken! That doesn’t mean we have to let the whole world know”

“I’ll just tweet about it if you like” Peter said. “Save you the hassle”

“Don’t be ridiculous! This is nothing to do with you” 

“HOW is it nothing to do with me?! You’re my dad, remember? Biologically? That’s entirely _about_ me!”

“Get out of here, Peter: this is a grown up conversation, and your arguments aren’t helping”

“But-”

“But nothing!” Tony shouted. “Do as you’re damn well told!”

“Tony, I really think-”

“No, it’s fine” Peter stood up, interrupting her. “I wouldn’t stay in here if you paid me! You can deny it and pretend it doesn’t matter all you want; I don’t care anyway! You never should’ve done the stupid test in the first place”

-

Peter slammed down at the piano. He didn’t know why it had made him so angry, but he felt like he was bubbling over. He thought Tony had turned a corner, but obviously he’d been wrong. He was glad he’d left though: he had a feeling he’d have ended up with a smack if he’d stayed and argued the point.

He lifted the fall board. He put his headphones over his ears and opened his MP3 player. He looked at the song waiting to play. By some wonderful coincidence, it was exactly what he wanted to listen to. And exactly what he needed to play.

“Your old man got mad when I told him we were leaving. He cursed and he raged and he swore at the ceiling. He called you his child, said honey, get wise to his game, he’ll get you in trouble-”

As he played, and sang, Peter couldn’t help thinking it was funny that a song with absolutely no relation to his current situation could feel so relevant. So close. Like it was written for him, to listen to and delve into in this exact moment in his life. It was so easy to get lost in the feeling of it, as if it was just an extension of himself. He was aware of how his fingers were moving on the ivories, aware of how far he’d come since that first shaky lesson all those months ago. But it didn’t feel like an effort at all.  
  
“..Saw your hands trembling, your eyes opened in surprise. It’s ninety in the shade babe and there ain’t a cloud in the sky.. I called you my child, said honey, now this is our game. There’s two of us to play it, and I’m happy to be home again…”

Maybe Peter didn’t care about what his parents thought, especially Tony. Not right now, anyway. They could shout and scream and argue and kick off as much as they wanted to. As long as he had a set of headphones, and he had his piano, he’d be able to while away the time and block it all out until everything got back to normal.

“..And it’s, all over now, don’t you worry no more, we’re gonna go west to the sea.. The greyhound is swaying, and the radio’s playing, some blues for baby and me"

*


	14. Bitter Fingers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been more than two months since I last updated, and I can only apologise!   
> I'm on a part-time contract, but as an essential worker during a pandemic, I've been doing mostly full-time hours, and we're all absolutely shattered, and what with my M.E and various other conditions, as well as the circumstances, I've had a real struggle.
> 
> BUT I've finally got a little bit of time off, and a writers kick (at the time of writing, it's nearly 6am, and I've been up all night finishing this chapter!), so here's an update!
> 
> Thank you to anyone still reading! As always, comments and questions welcome, and take care! Thank you

-

He knew exactly what he was doing, thumping out heavy, almost furious, soulful notes, singing the words perfectly, with feeling, with vigour, with a real sense of urgency. 

“You’re good” Tony said, once he’d finished the song.

Peter slowly turned to him. He’d had a feeling he was being watched; he just hadn’t realised who by. They’d ended up in another argument after Li had left the previous day, and hadn’t spoken since. He turned back to the piano.

“I know”

“Why don’t you play something else? Something classical?”

“I don’t want to”

“Why not?”

“I just don’t” Peter said, putting his hands back on the keys.

“Well, play something more upbeat”

Peter paused, thinking, and then started playing. At first Tony seemed almost approving, but as the first verse flew by, his expression changed.

“-Think I’m gonna kill myself, cause a little suicide, stick around for a couple of da-”

“PETER!”

“What?! You told me to play something more upbeat!”

“I didn’t mean _this_! This song is so insensitive”

“Sir Elton tried to kill himself thrice:- I think he’s within his rights to sing about it” 

“That doesn’t mean _you_ are!”

“Don’t you have anything better to do?” Peter scowled. “Why are you up here?”

“I wanted to see you play”

“Why?”

“Why? Because you’re my son, maybe?”

“Oh, so I’m your son now, am I?”

Tony sighed. “Don’t start”

“I’m not starting anything” Peter shrugged, looking back at his piano, studying the front as though he had a songbook open. 

“I thought you liked performing. You’ve been singing to your father, haven’t you?”

“He actually wants to listen, and he’s not in denial”

“What makes you think I’m in denial?”

Peter gave him a look, looking so similar to Loki that for a moment, Tony wasn’t sure how to react. Eventually, he just sighed and sat down next to Peter, taking his MP3.

“I’ll choose something for you. You can play by ear, right?”

“I’m playing Sir Elton” Peter said. “Don’t mess with my playlist”

“Alright, calm down. How about Crocodile Rock? That’s an upbeat one”

“Maybe I don’t want to play anything upbeat. Stop messing with my stuff”

Peter tried to snatch the player back, but Tony held it out of his reach. 

“Fine. Do you think you can play _I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues_?”

“Maybe I don’t want to take your suggestions” Peter snatched the player back, scrolling through. “If it’ll make you go away, I’ll play a less sad one, but _this_ is as good as you’re gonna get”

He put his player down, shifted position so he wouldn’t clash elbows with Tony, and once again set to the ivories. In some ways, it was easy to block Tony out, even with him so close. But in other ways, he liked knowing he was there. More than that, he liked knowing that he was good:- he could play, and he could sing, and he’d achieved every bit of it without any help, knowledge, input, or support from the man sat beside him, who just so happened to be part of the reason why he was ever born. He could feel himself being watched, but he made sure never to look at him, and he just kept performing, feeling melancholy, but triumphant - almost like he wanted to stick out his tongue at his father and shout; “nah nah ne nah nah, look what I can do without you!”. But instead he just kept singing.

“…If someone else is suffering en _ough_ , oh to write it down. When every single word makes sense, then it’s easier to have those songs around. The kick in _side_ is in the l _i_ ne that finally gets to you, and it feels so good to hurt so bad, and suffer just enough to sing the blues. So turn ‘em on, turn 'em on, turn on those sad songs. When all hope is gone, why don’t you tune in and turn them on..?”

-

Peter took his headphones off. For a moment there was silence, and then Tony turned and wrapped his arms around the boy, pulling him close. Peter stayed still, hardly even daring to breathe. He wasn’t sure he trusted Tony’s intentions, whatever they might be, and after some of the things that had been said over the past couple of days, he wasn’t sure he wanted to be near him at all. After what felt like an eternity, he spoke, surprising himself.

“Just because I love you the most, that doesn’t mean you’re the best parent”

-

Loki looked over Tony’s shoulder. 

“What are you looking at?”

“Just an email from the school. They’re doing a huge show at the end of term”

“I thought we’d essentially decided to withdraw him from the school?”

“Yeah… But maybe we should send him back now. Let him finish the term”

Loki was quiet for a moment. “Why the change of heart? You don’t want him to end up leaving out of someone else’s choice, do you?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well. Let’s be honest; if he were at a mainstream school, and-or you weren’t his father, he’d probably have been expelled by now”

Tony took his hand away from his mouth. “…Am I a bad parent?”

“Sometimes”

Tony couldn’t help but laugh slightly. “Thanks for the brutal honesty”

“Do you really think I’m going to lie to you? Especially after the way you’ve been since we got those DNA results?”

Tony didn’t respond. Loki sighed, looking at the email on Tony’s screen. 

“Is there really much point sending him back for two weeks?”

Tony shrugged. “Get him out from under our feet?”

“Charming. And here I was thinking you’d turned a corner”

“I was joking!” Tony exclaimed, showing a glimmer of personality for the first time all day. “It might be good for him to get out of the house, and tie up loose ends. I don’t think he’s talked to any of the Bunnies since the last time he was there”

“Well, if you took the time to stop sulking and actually speak to him, you’d know that he’s still been talking to Flo, and he’s even made amends with Millie”

“And Macy?”

Loki grimaced. “Still a touchy subject, I think”

Tony sighed heavily. “They were such a cute little group. It was good that he had proper friends. He’d never really had them before”

“Well, maybe not, but I can’t say I think it’s that important. From what I’ve learnt, humans don’t often keep their school friends throughout the rest of their lives anyway”

“That’s not-” Tony stopped, and sighed. “Go and get him, would you?”

“I think he’s busy”

“L _o_ ki” 

“Alright, alright. I’ll go and get him”

-

Loki waited until Peter’s song had finished, and then gently laid a hand on his shoulder. Peter jumped slightly, pulling his headphones off.

“Oh, it’s just you”

“Your presence is requested in the kitchen”

Peter whined. “Do I have to?”

“Yes”

“Why? What does he want?”

“He wants to ask you something”

“What?”

“I shouldn’t say”

“Aww, _please_!”

Loki took one look at Peter’s puppy-dog eyes and gave in. “Fine, but don’t let on I’ve told you. He wants to ask how you feel about finishing the term at school”

“Oh” Peter said. “Well, sure. It’s only a couple of weeks, isn’t it?”

“Yes. Do you think you can stay out of trouble for that long?” 

Peter shrugged. “Maybe~. You’ll relay my message, won’t you?” He turned back to the piano.

“Hey, you’re not getting out of it that easily!”

“Aww, but daddy! I’ve nearly nailed that hard piano riff in Burn Down The Mission! It’ll throw off my groove if I stop now!”

“You’ll just have to practice later” Loki said, taking hold of him and lifting him into his arms. “Come along, Elton. Better not leave him waiting too much longer”

-

Peter couldn’t work out why Tony didn’t seem satisfied with his answer. He stayed where he was on Loki’s hip, feeling somehow tiny and mighty at the same time. 

“You’ll go back tomorrow then”

“Why tomorrow?”

“Why not? It’s Monday. Better day than any” Tony said. “You’d better find your uniform so we can get it ready”

“By ‘we’, I take it you mean me?” Loki said.

“Um-”

Loki laughed. “Don’t look so scared! I’ll sort it”

Peter looked at both of his parents, but settled on Tony. 

“This is going to be my last term, isn’t it?”

Tony didn’t say anything, but he didn’t need to. 

“Did you need anything else?”

“No…”

“Can I go back to my piano now?”

“Maybe take a little break” Loki said. “Your hands must be aching after all that playing”

“I’m fine!”

“Hold your hands out”

Peter did as he was told, reluctantly, and with a bit of difficulty due to his position. Thank god for strong thighs, he thought to himself. Loki took one look at the boys shaking hands and shook his head.

“Let them rest, sweetheart”

“It’s just a trapped muscle” Peter tried.

“You really shouldn’t try to lie to someone as good at it as I am” Loki said.

“Well, I don’t want to lounge about doing nothing” Peter pouted. 

“No amount of baby-face is going to make me change my mind”

Tony watched them together. Bar a few unsavoury incidents after May’s death, Loki always managed to hold it together and be a good father to Peter. As much as he hated to admit it, Tony knew that it was him who was always rubbish is times of crisis. Loki was right; he was a bad father sometimes. Especially since finding out he was a biological father. 

“Why don’t we go for a swim?” he suggested.

Loki and Peter stopped and looked at him, Peter glaring, and Loki very nearly doing the same. 

“…Theoretically… Could a god impregnate a human woman at the same time as a human man, and have shared parentage with the human, so like, the kid had three bio parents?”

Loki looked at him, searching his face. He glanced at Peter, and then back at his husband. He knew what he was getting at.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Anthony”

-

They didn’t go for a swim. Tony started sulking again and went down to the lab, not doing proper work; just attempting to make comprehensive shapes out of solder, while Loki tried in vain to teach Peter some magic upstairs. 

“It doesn’t seem to be taking” he said eventually. 

“Maybe humans can’t do it” Peter said. “I can kinda feel it when you put your hands over mine, but I can’t make any of that feeling come to me naturally, yknow?”

“Well, perhaps you aren’t made to do magic. Maybe you need a spark to begin with.. Ah well. Your talents lie elsewhere”

“I guess so” 

Peter closed his eyes, trying to focus on pushing energy to his fingertips like Loki had said. No matter how hard he tried, it still just seemed so much more like a concept and a metaphor than an actual physical thing he could do. He gave up and opened his eyes.

“It doesn’t work. Can’t you like, transfer your magic to me or something?”

Loki laughed slightly. “It doesn’t really work like that, chick. Now, you should probably go and get all your school stuff together; save having to do it last thing”

“Aw, it’s gonna be tough having to get up in the morning. I’ve completely fucked up my sleep schedule”

“I guessed as much. And don’t swear: you know your dad’ll go spare if he hears you”

“That’s his problem”

“It won’t be when you’re over his knee now, will it? Now go and find your uniform. We’ll sort everything physical and then work on a game plan”

“Alright. But can I ask you something first?”

Loki raised an eyebrow, an always ambiguous notion in situations such as this.

“Why have you been looking at houses to buy in Scotland?”

“Peter, I told you to go and get your uniform”

Peter sighed, shrugged, and went to do as he was told. 

-

He was distracted from his Loki-based thoughts when he found the uniform. It felt weird thinking this would be the last term he’d wear it. He’d hated it so much at the start, and he wasn’t exactly a huge fan now, but oddly, he felt almost attached to it. Aside from the hat. He’d never worn that. In fact, the only thing he’d really done with it, aside from hate it, was use it as a frisbee. It made a surprisingly good one in a pinch. He’d worn Flo’s school hat a few times when she’d put it on him, but the girls had straw hats with ribbon, which were quite universal, and even looked cute on some people. A far cry from the horrible little peaked caps the boys had, which suited only the smallest of the first years and exactly five people in Peter’s years group, one of which was Macy. St Hendricks certainly had its downsides, but at least, despite everyone owning them, the hats weren’t strictly enforced. It had saved a lot of embarrassment. 

Peter looked at his uniform, specifically the jacket and tie. Come to think of it, they’d both taken quite a beating. He was actually on his third tie: he’d train-tracked his first one so badly that the bottom six inches were unrecognisable as a school tie, and he’d been told he had to either buy another one or go on uniform report, and he’d set the second one on fire with a bunsen burner to set the fire alarm off after a teacher had told him that being a famous persons son didn’t give him any right not to pay attention in class. He was still quite proud of that one. Malaki had taken the blame for him though, so he’d never seen any real repercussions for it. 

As for his blazer… well, it was only Loki’s surprisingly perfect sewing and washing skills that had made it last as long as it had. It had been stained with everything you could think of, from blood to poster paint, and somehow still come up clean. It had also suffered it’s fair share of ripped seams and torn lining, and of course the time the back seam had completely given up following a particularly rough drama lesson - another incident which had nearly landed him on uniform report as well as in detention. 

It was quite funny, in a way, how he was perceived at that school. At Midtown, he’d been a bit of a loner, a bit of an outcast, but generally a model pupil. At St Hendricks, he was generally considered a hell-raiser - and it was the teachers who had said that first, not him. When he really thought about it, he could almost understand where they were coming from. Malaki aside, they were used to everyone falling into line and behaving like young ladies and gentlemen. So Peter rocking up and throwing tantrums (and fists), catapulting rubbers at the back of Nigel’s head, pushing Malaki into the swimming pool in the middle of lessons, and pulling drainpipes off the wall while retrieving footballs from the roof was probably a bit of a culture shock for them. 

Not that everyone seemed to mind. A lot of people seemed to have a bit of a soft spot for him, for whatever reason. He’d even quickly won over the new PE teacher, despite famously being bent over the equipment trolley and paddled with a cricket bat during the teachers first week at the school. Even then, he hadn’t really hit him hard (and nowhere near as hard as he’d hit Nigel, who was by his side being disciplined a little bit too often). N-Pet, as he’d quickly become known, was, along with Mr Musgrove, one of Peter’s biggest defenders. Peter had become very good at using his small and quiet side to his advantage, even to such an extent as causing havoc and running to hide behind a teacher he knew would have his back. Maybe he was a little bastard, Peter thought. But maybe that made sense, considering the school he went to. 

Peter took Loki his uniform, but he didn’t stop. He went to sort out his school bag, thinking deeply as he did so. He’d been so sure he’d hate the school, but he didn’t really, not so much. He’d made friends fast enough, and he’d had good times. And weird times. Especially where Nigel was concerned…

Nigel was certainly weird. Him and Peter had essentially been sworn enemies since day one, but, for some reason, Nigel always defended Peter, even covering his back to stop him getting into trouble. And then there was all of their store cupboard encounters. And the time Nigel had asked him to the dance. And that time at Nigel’s when-… Well, Peter didn’t like to think about that. It had ended in an argument anyway, which was very on form. Peter still didn’t know what to make of Nigel, but he was sure Nigel didn’t know what to make of him either. Maybe it was one of those questions that didn’t really need an answer. He didn’t suppose he’d ever see him again after the end of term anyway.

He hoped he’d still see Flo. And Millie. He wasn’t sure about Macy yet, or Malaki. He supposed the next couple of weeks would be a final hurdle where the latter two were concerned.

-

Loki went to find Peter a little later on.

“I was getting worried” he said. “You just disappeared”

“Sorry…”

“…What are you listening to?”

“…It’s called Black Tables”

Loki sat down beside him on the bed. He knew that look, and he suddenly knew why Peter had been alone in here for the past few hours. Peter kept his eyes on his hands. He’d gone too deep into his thoughts, and he knew making eye contact would be fatal.

“You should try playing this some time” Loki said. “It’s got plenty of piano in it”

Peter nodded slightly. Loki was quiet for a moment, and then he rested a hand on Peter’s.

“Sweetheart”

Peter looked up at him, and burst into tears. 

“Oh, sweetheart…” 

Loki carefully put his arms round the boy. At first, Peter didn’t move, but he gave in soon enough and he held onto his father as he cried. Loki slowly tightened his loose grip, and Peter cried harder. He rested his cheek against the top of the boys head, and rocked him gently.

-

The bedroom door burst open, making them both jump.

“Tony! You nearly blew the bloody door off!” Loki scowled. 

“Don’t exaggerate” he looked at Peter, snug in Loki’s arms. “Have you got all your stuff ready for school?”

Peter seemed to shrink away from him. He stayed quiet.

“I asked you a question, Peter!” Tony snapped.

“Don’t shout at him!” Loki shook his head disapprovingly and hugged Peter tighter. “It’s all ready; don’t you worry about that”

“Good. What do you want for tea?”

“I hadn’t really thought about it” Loki said. “I’ve got my hands full”

Tony sighed. “What’s up with him now?”

“I don’t know yet”

He held Peter protectively, trying to shield him - but Peter had other ideas. 

“ _You’re_ what’s wrong!” he suddenly shouted. “You’d know that if you cared”

“Sorry, _I’m_ what’s wrong?” Tony said, shocked. “Don’t be ridiculous!”

“I’m not _being_ ridiculous!” Peter shot back. “You could at least admit to how you’ve been acting!”

He tried to pull away, but Loki held onto him, adjusting his hold slightly.

“Peter, stop it” he said. “This isn’t the time for an argument”

“Well, why not?! When _is_ the time?”

“Peter, I said stop”

Peter went quiet, but growled defensively when Tony sat down next to Loki. 

“I think we need to talk, don’t you?” he said. He glanced at Loki. “Just the two of us?”

Peter clung to Loki. He had a bad feeling about this. 

“Well… I could always go and get started on tea” Loki said, letting go of Peter.

“No! Don’t go!” 

Loki couldn’t ignore the urgency in his voice. “What is it?”

“Please don’t leave me alone with him!” Peter begged, keeping tight hold of Loki’s shirt. “He’s gonna do something to me!”

“Oh for gods sake!” Tony fumed. “You’re being ridiculous! You’re just getting all muddled in that silly little mind of yours”

“Tony! Don’t speak to him like that!” 

“Like what?! I thought you were going to sort some food out?”

“I’m not leaving, not when he’s scared”

“He’s _not_ scared; he’s just attention seeking!” Tony insisted. He narrowed his eyes at Peter. “You need to start behaving yourself”

In Peter’s ears, that sounded like a threat. 

“See?! He’s gonna hurt me if you leave!”

“I’m not gonna hurt you! And if I was gonna smack you - which I should, considering your attitude as of late - I’d have no qualms about doing it in front of your father”

Peter started crying all over again.

“Oh, that’s it; turn on the water-works”

“Tony, that’s enough!” Loki snapped, pulling Peter close. “You’re upsetting him, and I’m not sure I like the look in your eyes either”

There was a short silence, and Tony stood up.

“I’m gonna get started on tea”

“You do that”

-

Peter was more than just a little reluctant about going through to the kitchen for tea, but Loki managed to coax him. There was still a heavy atmosphere between the three of them, and Peter’s spidey senses were still giving him grief. As a result, he couldn’t settle. Everything tasted weird, and his throat was tight, so eating wasn’t easy. 

About halfway through the meal, Loki excused himself and stood up. 

“W-wait, where are you going?!” Peter squeaked, struggling up and scurrying after him.

“Hey, hey, don’t look so scared!” Loki said, stopping him. “I’m just going to empty my bladder: I’m going to do myself an injury if I hold it any longer. Finish your tea”

He carefully detached Peter’s hands from his shirt. Peter watched the door close behind him. Suddenly the kitchen felt a little too bright, and he became hyper-aware of the fact that Tony had been watching him. He swallowed, his mouth feeling and tasting weird, as though he’d just had a nosebleed. 

He snapped round quickly when Tony stood up, and took a few steps back. 

“I’m just about sick to death of you, young man” Tony growled. “Now, come here!”

Peter shook his head, his pulse beating in his ears, and took another step back.

“Right”

Tony grabbed hold of him. Ordinarily he wouldn’t have been a match for the boy - but all of Peter’s fight seemed to have disappeared, and all he could do was gasp and flinch as Tony tugged him closer. 

“I’m sick of all your attention seeking and drama performances. You need to learn how to behave yourself”

Peter tried to say something - anything - but that familiar horrible feeling was welling in his throat, choking his words as though he were talking to a complete stranger. The seconds seemed to be dragging, and he felt hot and sick and helpless, unable to speak, shaking, but hardly able to move. He tried hard to pull free from Tony’s iron grip - and was suddenly smacked, hard. It made him jump and flinch at the same time, and before he’d really comprehended what had happened, he was over Tony’s lap, and he was smacked again. And again. And again.

It hadn’t always hurt this much, Peter was sure of it. And it definitely didn’t use to make him feel sick like this, or set his senses off like this. And he’d never been so overcome with fear as to cause his selective mutism to act against his parents. He completely froze, stuck, unable to even gasp audibly. 

But then he heard footsteps. And the door. And then he was suddenly back on his feet - but only just. 

“What the hell is going on here?! It’s no wonder he was so scared earlier if this is the way you’ve decided to treat him!” Loki shouted, putting an arm out to support the trembling Peter. “Those DNA results should have _strengthened_ your bond, if anything:- not made you turn against him!”

“This is nothing to do with that!” Tony insisted. “He doesn’t know how to behave! Cutting discipline out of our parenting-”

“We _didn’t_ cut out discipline! We-” he stopped, looking at Peter. “Are you ok?”

Peter shook his head. He suddenly found his feet, and was out of there in a flash. There was a pause, and then Loki picked up where he left off.

“Just because we stopped smacking him, that doesn’t mean we stopped disciplining him, and you know that as well as I do. And _that_ ” he said, gesturing. “Was definitely _not_ what we used to do! I saw, and that was a proper wallop; that wasn’t the kind of thing we ever agreed on. Don’t get me wrong, Anthony: I knew you were going to hit him again sometime soon. But I expected a little spanking, not a good attempt at knocking the living daylights out of the poor thing! What the hell were you thinking?!”

“I don’t know! I was angry! He’s been doing my head in!”

“You’re not allowed to pull that card! It’s no excuse for what you’ve just done! You’re angry at yourself; not him!”

“How’d you work that one out?”

“Because I _know_ you, Anthony Edward Stark! And so I should, considering how long we’ve been together. Peter has not done a single malicious thing since we got those DNA results, unlike you, Mister Stark. Ok, maybe he’s done a few bitchy little things, but only in retaliation to the things you’ve done first. And besides, you’re meant to be the grown-up here: why don’t you try to act like it?”

“…I haven’t been _that_ bad”

“Is that so? Why don’t we reflect? How about the day we found out? Not forgetting of course your insensitive crack at my infertility, but how about causing an argument over him moving a tub of coffee, which ended in you slapping him across the face? Or how about ignoring all his calls and texts? Sure, you seemed better after that night away, but then you got back to causing arguments and having a go at him for no reason. And-”

“Ok, ok, I get it!” Tony interrupted. “I’m just stressed”

“Oh, and I’m not? Good god. I’m glad he’s going back to school: it’s probably in his best interests to be away from you right now”

There was a short silence. 

“I’m not a bad parent, Loki”

Loki looked at him. He looked at the uncertainty on his face, and the tears in his eyes. He kept looking hard at him, and as soon as Tony started crying, he looked away. 

“I’m going to go and check on my son” he said, and left Tony to his own devices.

-

Loki fully expected Peter to be cuddled up with his elephant, so he was surprised not to see him there. The en suite was empty, as was the bed - both on and under. He stood for a moment, thinking, and then went to his own room, only to find that empty too. He checked the reading nook, and the garden balcony, and then stopped. He knew where to go.

-

Loki opened the door to the store cupboard by the swimming pool. There, beside the mop buckets under the shelf, was exactly what he was looking for. 

“Now, this takes me back” he said gently.

Peter didn’t protest when Loki sat down beside him. He was hugging the May bear, resting his cheek on it’s head. It was made out of a shirt that had been in the box May’s work had given Peter. It usually lived on a shelf, displayed proudly, out of harms way, and Loki had long since learnt how bad a sign it was to find it in Peter’s arms. 

“…Do you ever wonder how his dad was with him?” Peter mumbled, breaking a long silence.

Loki paused. “I don’t think all those scars are from adulthood, if that’s what you mean”

“You dad was abusive, right?”

“Odin? Well. Not physically. Mentally, and emotionally, I think… But when your brain is wired as strangely as mine, it’s hard to work out what was wrong and what wasn’t. He was never really a father, not in the right way. I was there for the wrong reasons. He only saved me to use me as a bargaining chip. He never liked me. I don’t care anymore”

“What about your mum?”

“Ah. Well, she was definitely my mother. I suppose a part of me thought she always would be”

“So what happened?”

Loki smiled sadly. “I fell in love. I haven’t seen her since before I moved in with Tony”

“That’s a long time. It’s gotta hurt, right?” he paused. “She wrote to you”

Loki nodded. “She sent a wedding present. From Odin as well, supposedly”

“Did you ever reply?”

“No” Loki sighed. “There comes a time when it just feels pointless. It would be like looking up someone you met once in a pub and trying to have a meaningful conversation”

“Would you see her again? If you had the chance?”

“The way I see it” Loki said. “If she had wanted to stay in my life, she would have made an effort. There’s a lot stopping me from returning to Asgard. Nothing is stopping her from coming to Midgard”

“Does it still bother you?”

“Sometimes”

Peter raised his head, not looking at Loki, but more open now. 

“Why do some people have such hard lives?”

“It’s simply the luck of the draw”

“We’ve got dreadful luck”

Loki laughed slightly. “Maybe. But we’ve had some good luck too”

“Maybe…”

“Well, I got to adopt you, didn’t I? Despite the circumstances leading to it, that’s some luck, isn’t it?”

A small smile tugged at Peter’s lips. “Maybe”

Loki looked round the store room. There was time when they spent a considerable amount of time in here together. For whatever reason, after May died, it had become Peter’s hiding place. It had stayed that way for a long time, but now it was a little unusual to find him there, and definitely not a good thing. 

“Are you ready to come back upstairs?”

Peter nodded slightly.

“Ok…” Loki picked the boy up carefully, feeling almost as though he’d gone back in time. 

-

Loki sat cross-legged on Tony’s bed, watching him carefully. He was sat looking through a photo album, wet tears still on his face. 

“I’ve never been great at the hard stuff, have I? I mean… Even that year he came to stay with us, and you were so ill… I didn’t treat you great then, did I? I was kinda dreadful to you at times. And I cracked after May died. I guess we all did, but still… All that year… Even that first Christmas, I was all cross. Overreacting to the curfew thing a bit, I guess. And then when he had that building site accident, and the way he played up at that party, I got all cross about that too”

“We both got cross about the party. He did show us up a bit”

“Mmm… I was rubbish with the Kindsprengen stuff. Well, not the take-down, but the kid bit, especially that first week… And I guess I’m kinda responsible for your downfall after the IVF thing”

“You didn’t force the bottle into my hand”

“No, but I enabled it. I was too busy drowning my own sorrows to even listen to you, so you just did what I was doing. We basically isolated ourselves together. I was bad with the kid then, too. Said I’d keep visiting even though you were ill and couldn’t. And didn’t… Gave him up… Argued a fair bit last Christmas too…”

“What are you thinking?”

Tony lowered the album and looked at Loki. 

“I’ve been really bad lately. I don’t think my meds are working anymore. I don’t think they’ve worked for a while now”

Loki didn’t seem to react, but his eyes moved, and they said everything. 

“Tomorrow” Tony said. “You know people will rush me through”

He looked back at the album for a moment, and then closed it carefully. Loki watched him get up and put it back on the special shelf with the wedding album. 

“Do you think we should do couples counselling? Or, like, family counselling?”

“I think we’d be better off actually talking to each other before dragging someone else into it”

Tony sat back down beside him. “You want to say something else. I can tell”

Loki took a deep breath. “Maybe it’s just as well I’m infertile”

Completely without warning, both men broke down in tears. As if by magnetism, they found themselves in each others arms, and as horrible as they both felt, it was still good to hold each other.

-

Peter looked relieved but reproachful when his door opened.

“I thought you weren’t coming”

“I had a few things to sort out. I thought you might have fallen asleep by now”

“I tried, but… I don’t know. Everything hurts and it’s kinda keeping my mind awake”

Loki picked Peter up and sat down with him in his lap. Neither of them said anything for some minutes. 

“…Do you want to sleep in my bed tonight?”

Peter nodded. 

“Ok… Grab a cuddly toy”

-

Peter had always liked Loki’s room, and times like this made him regret not taking advantage of being allowed in there so much anymore. It always felt a little ethereal; strange and different, as though it wasn’t really part of the house. It was like a little window into Loki’s mind that showed you what he loved the most, and what made him feel the calmest and safest. It was his comfortable space. Peter couldn’t help but notice how Loki seemed to relax as soon as he closed the door behind them. As though he’d arrived home.

He was quiet. Silent, even. Peter didn’t say anything either. He let Loki set him down on the bed and tuck his toy Peter Rabbit in beside him. He lay there, looking around him while Loki was in the bathroom. Peter liked most everything in this room, from the silken sheets to the family photos, to the old Snoopy on the chair by the wardrobe, to the deep rug by the bed. The only thing he didn’t like was the Betty Boop lamp. None of the little statues bothered him, but the lamp was a big one that was essentially a light up ornament, and it always seemed to watch him. He sat up to look at it - but it wasn’t in it’s usual spot. Looking around, he couldn’t see it on any of the dressers or shelves. He carefully slipped off the bed, curious now - and then froze like a deer in headlights as the en suite door opened.

Loki raised an eyebrow. “Going somewhere, chicken?”

“Your lamp’s gone!”

“Oh? Which one?”

“The Betty Boop on the lamp post one”

“Ah” Loki sighed. “Yes”

“What happened?”

“Well. Your father was showing me his new developments for the Iron Man gauntlets” he said, picking Peter up and putting him back on the bed. “Only it wasn’t perfected, and it malfunctioned a little and fired and… Well. Bye-bye Betty. Beyond repair. Completely shattered”

“That’s awful! Did you cry?”

“Maybe a little” Loki admitted. “So did Tony; he felt awful. He couldn’t find another one online, but I said it didn’t matter either way. Could have been worse, I suppose”

“You really loved that lamp. It took you years to convince him”

“Enough about the lamp, sweetheart. It’s getting on a bit, and you could really do with a good nights sleep” Loki pushed Peter onto his back. “Stay”

Loki turned the night light on and the big light off, and then finally climbed into bed. 

“Have you stolen my pig?”

Peter handed it over. “Do I really have to go to school tomorrow?”

“It’s best that you do, darling. No, don’t start fussing. It’s only a few weeks, and then you never have to go again”

“I guess so”

Loki put an arm round Peter, hugging him close. “Goodnight, sweetie”

“Daddy?”

“Mm?”

“You’re the better parent”

Loki closed his eyes. “Go to sleep, chick”

*


	15. A Heart Has Many Secrets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry again for how long updating this is taking!  
> I write on tumblr and the update has a bunch of features xkit hasn't fixed, so that's tricky.  
> But that aside, I'm still an essential worker doing double their contracted hours, doing lots of two-on, one-off, three-on, one-off, shifts, and I'm having a tough time fitting in anything other than work and sleep due to my health too. But, I got a writers kick and even though its now 5am, at least I've finally got some writing done! Enjoy!

-

Getting ready for school the next morning felt incredibly strange; almost foreign. Getting up early hadn’t been easy. He didn’t have an appetite, which nearly led to a bit of a ding-dong with Loki, who was very insistent he needed to eat anyway. And, as if tensions weren’t high enough, Loki broke the news that he had to go to work so wouldn’t be able to take him to school.

-

Peter wasn’t happy being in the car with Tony, and he made his feelings very clear. He’d become very good at keeping silent since becoming a member of the Stark household. Tony wouldn’t be deterred though, and kept talking, offering unwanted advice, reassurance, and generally chatting away as though he were actually getting an answer from the teen beside him.

Peter tried to dive out of the car as soon as they parked, but Tony grabbed his arm.

“Hey” he said. “Come here”

Tony hugged him, and Peter pulled away furiously. Tony kept hold of his arm a moment longer.

“Be good, sweetheart. I’ll see you after school”

Peter scowled, and Tony reluctantly released him. Peter took great pleasure in slamming the car door behind him. Oddly, as he walked towards the main building, he didn’t feel as though he’d been away all that long. He didn’t feel nervous either. In fact, he felt quite calm; although he was certain he could see huge changes on the horizon - far above what he could imagine.

-

Peter seemed to have inherited Loki’s flare for a low-key but poignant entrance. Oddly, as he walked into his form room, and was met by the shouts and voices of so many, he felt so free. In a way, he felt like a felon who was to be released while everyone else was left behind. Let’s be honest; he’d never quite managed to fit into this high-class school in the way everyone had hoped. And he didn’t care. He wasn’t sure how homeschooling was going to go, but he felt so calm looking at everyone, that he was certain he wasn’t going to miss this.

-

Going to his music lesson after lunch was the only thing that almost made him change his mind about the school. He’d grown to be quite close to Mr James since starting private lessons. Mr James was so down to Earth, so unlike a lot of the other teachers, and so supportive of Peter’s playing, and always seemed impressed with all of his progress.

“It’s good to see you again, kiddo” he said, shutting the practice room door. “How have you been? I heard about what you did”

Peter shrugged noncommittally, but he looked a little embarrassed. 

“Don’t worry” Mr James said, squeezing his shoulder. “I was a right little terror when I was a kid. When I was your age, I’d been expelled four times”

Peter looked at him.

“Yes, really! If someone hadn’t shoved a saxophone into my hands, I probably would’ve got expelled from the last school too! Incredible how much music can help you turn things around”

Peter nodded, sitting down at the piano, running his fingers along the keys. 

“I don’t suppose you’ve had any chance to practice. I hope you’re not too rusty”

“I’ve got one at home now” Peter said, and then started slightly, surprising himself.

It surprised Mr James too. “Nice! I’ve gotta say, kiddo, I imagined your voice a lot different”

Peter could feel himself blushing, but Mr James just smiled.

“It’s nice to hear it. Now, fancy showing me what you’ve been working on?”

Peter swallowed, turning to the piano properly. He felt nervous now, and he was still surprised that his voice had jumped out. But maybe… maybe that meant he could perform properly here. 

Maybe.

But he couldn’t think of what to say, and Mr James could see his hesitation.

“Why don’t you do something we were working on first?” he suggested. “Clair de lune?”

Slow, but long. A good way to ease in. Peter understood his choice. It had been a little while since he’d played anything classical. He watched Mr James find a page in a book and set it in front of Peter. He’d managed to pick up a few notes, but he didn’t really need them. He knew this track well enough; it was so popular. 

It was nice playing it, though. Something so familiar, and calm, but somehow dramatic too. He didn’t feel like he was playing the music, but more like it was playing him; making his fingers glide almost effortlessly across the keys. He started feeling much more relaxed, much less nervous and embarrassed. Maybe he’d miss this. All these calm, practice room moments… 

“…That was perfect” Mr James said. “You’re incredible. I’ve never known someone learn so fast, and so well”

“Thank you…”

“You know, I do lessons outside of school. If you wanted to continue after you leave”

“I… I’d have to ask dad” Peter said, not quite looking at him, his voice small.

“What have you been working on?”

Peter shrugged slightly. He’d been playing a lot since getting the piano, mainly to drown out everything else that was happening. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to play. Maybe something fast, or something complex. Maybe…

“I’ve got one, but it’s kinda… long”

“That’s alright. So was the one we just played. If there’s anything you want to show me, just go ahead. This is your lesson, your learning, and your talent: you don’t have to let other people decide what you do with it”

Peter looked at him. He’d played strange and wonderful things to him before, and he trusted him - both his music judgement and personally.

Mr James listened, unsure if he recognised the tune at first, and then startling when Peter opened his mouth.

“You tell me there’s an angel in your tree. Did he say he’d come to call on me?  
For things are getting desperate in our home, living in the parish of the restless folks I know”

Mr James watched him. He’d only just heard him speak, so finding out that he had a voice - and one like _this_ \- was a bit of a shock to say the least.

“Burn down the mission, if we’re gonna stay alive. Watch the black smoke fly to heaven, see the red flame light the sky. Burn down the mission, burn it down to stay alive. It’s our only chance of l _i_ ving, take all you need-” 

And it carried on like that, with power and passion, and very few wobbles, and all too soon, voice and keys petered out, and the practice room was filled with a moments silence.

Mr James merely leaned closer. “What else have you got?”

Peter couldn’t help but grin, and he knew exactly what to play now. Something a bit tricky. But something he knew well enough after all the times he’d played it.

“-But where were all your shoulders when we cried? Were the darlings on the sideline, dreaming up such cherished lies? To whisper in your ear before you die”

Something that had started as a way to show off a bit soon turned into something to enjoy, and in his usual fashion, he got sucked into the music deeply. He wasn’t even distracted by Mr James gently correcting his posture as he played.

“Junk.., angel.., this closet’s always stacked. The dealers in the basement, fillin’ your prescription for a brand new _heart_ attack. But where were all your shoulders when we cried? Were the doctors in attendance saying how they felt so sick inside, or was it just the sc _alp_ el blade that lied?”

Peter shivered, but he didn’t miss a note. He didn’t let up, hardly even opened his eyes, until he’d tapped out the last few notes.

Once again, there was a moments silence. Peter looked at Mr James, biting his lip nervously. The man looked back, and smiled.

“You’re a special case, Peter Parker-Stark” he said. “You should sign up for the end of term show”

“I don’t know…”

“Well I do, and I think it’s a great idea. You don’t have to sing, but you should definitely play and show everyone what you can do. Go out with a bang”

-

Peter was ready to tell Loki all about his day, so he was pretty furious when Tony turned up to collect him at the end of school. Luckily, Tony was on a work call, which eliminated any awkward one-sided conversation. He was still on the call when they got home, so Peter wasted no time in getting out of the car and darting upstairs. He rushed to Loki’s room, but stopped outside, hearing voices.

“…As long as there’s a decent school within walking distance, that area would work well” Loki was saying. “What are the public transport links like? I had a hire car so…”

Peter stayed quiet, pressing his ear up against the door. What on earth was he talking about? He must be on the phone, but who to? All this talk of schools and transport and amenities. It was almost as though-

“PETER!”

Peter jumped so violently he smacked his head on the door frame.

“Ow!”

“Serves you right” Tony said. “What are you doing, eavesdropping like that?”

“Daddy’s on the phone” Peter mumbled, rubbing his head. 

“I’ll ask you again: what are you doing, eavesdropping like that?”

“Being nosy, I guess”

“Come here”

Peter looked at Tony properly, remembered he was supposed to be giving him the silent treatment, and scowled, annoyed at both of them. Tony sighed, deciding he had better things to do than argue.

“Go and get changed. Now”

Peter didn’t really have a choice, not with Tony watching. He shut his door behind him, throwing his bag down and pulling his tie off. Typical of Tony to sneak in undetected at such a crucial moment. Tragically, there was an en-suite and a cupboard between Peter’s room and Loki’s, so he couldn’t even listen through the wall. He’d have to get his answers some other time.

-

Peter got changed, checked the coast was clear, and snuck back over to Loki’s door. Loki was _still_ on the phone, although the conversation seemed to be coming to an end. 

“-Like I said, it’s still just an idea. It’s good to have all the fact first though. Sorry…? Yes, of course… Thanks again, chick. Talk to you soon. Bye now”

Everything went quiet, and Peter stood where he was, even more confused than before. Loki only called people he cared about ‘chick’. Who could he be talking to? 

As he was considering the options, Loki’s door opened, making Peter jump. They looked at each other.

“Hello, you” Loki said, closing his door behind him.

Something was off here, Peter knew it. “Who were you talking to?”

“Maggie, one of the ladies I worked with in Scotland. You know, I told you about her?”

Peter nodded slightly. He’d heard a lot of stories about Loki’s time in Scotland after he’d got back from his sabbatical. He used to talk about it a lot, but he hadn’t heard him mention it much lately. Although… he’d been looking at houses for sale, hadn’t he?

“Peter? Are you listening to me?”

“Huh?” Peter shook his head slightly. “Sorry”

“Never mind, sweetheart” Loki said, kissing him on the forehead. “Do you want a hot drink while I’m making one?”

Peter shook his head. He watched Loki go, and then looked back at the door. If Loki was just making a drink, he usually just left his door open. Peter knew that he was being overly suspicious, but he wanted answers. So he opened the door and slipped into Loki’s room. 

Loki’s tablet was on the bed. Peter tapped the screen, hoping it had only just timed out. No such luck: it wanted a password. Well, Peter knew a lot of Tony’s passwords, but he’d never managed to guess any of Loki’s - aside from his phone password. Peter abandoned the tablet and picked up Loki’s phone. He tapped in the pin he remembered - and the phone opened. He sat on the bed, looking through the phone. Loki hadn’t lied; his last call had been to Maggie. More than an hour, it had been. He looked through the notes on the phone. Most of it was the usual stuff: extra shifts, household tasks, ongoing shopping lists, something about Tony’s prescription, and then something titled ‘Peter’.

Peter looked up, checking the door, and then clicked on the note. It was another list: School, Room, Tech, Piano, Swimming?, Music, Drama?, Routine. Bike???

Peter looked at the list, confused. He had absolutely no idea what was going on here. What was the thought process? He closed the notes, glanced up, and spotted a notebook, just the corner poking out from under the pillow. He picked it up. It looked old, with curled corners and a well-thumbed front cover. He opened it, finding more notes - but this looked more professional, and upon closer inspection, he suddenly knew what it was. This was Loki’s old notebook from when he’d been working in Scotland; notes on the kids he was helping look after, everything from history to medical appointments to nighttime routines. Why would he be looking at his again? Nostalgia? But, if it was just nostalgia, why would he be hiding it? He liked talking about it; they were used to it in this house now. So why the secrecy? Or was Peter just being paranoid?

He put the notebook back, and picked up Loki’s phone again, opening his recent texts. There wasn’t much. Nothing to people in Scotland, anyway. He opened his latest texts to Tony. ‘Back at 3 x” read the last one. Above that wasn’t really much of interest. Lots of saying when they’d be back, asking if the other needed anything, quick ‘I love you’ texts, that kind of thing. But when he went back further, he found what looked like an argument, and he clicked the back button, sharpish. He knew his parents argued sometimes, but he didn’t like thinking about it. He sighed, and put the phone down. He was just being silly. 

He stood up, and something crackled beneath his foot. He crouched down, taking hold of the folder. It was a new one, evidenced by the price sticker still in place. He opened it, surprised at how thick it felt, and surprised even further by what he found inside. All of a sudden he felt a bit sick, and hot, and on high alert; his pulse beating in his ears. He took the papers out of the folder, looking through them properly. Job adverts, some of them. Information about residency and citizenship and things like that. And property listings. Lots of them, with notes and bullet points written on them in Loki’s familiar scrawl. He swallowed hard, trying to focus on the words - and then the door opened. Peter jumped, and gasped a little, looking at his father. 

Loki carefully set his mug of tea down on the nearest cabinet. Peter couldn’t move, only watch, as Loki came over to him. 

“And what” Loki said, dangerously quiet. “Do you think you’re doing?”

“I-I-I was just-” his hands were shaking, and he dropped everything. “Ah! I- Sorry!”

He went to pick everything up, but Loki put a hand out, stopping him. Peter stayed as still as he could while Loki gathered everything and put it back in its folder. Loki stood up, dragging Peter to his feet too. He left him stood there and put the folder into the little lockable filing cabinet by the desk. 

“Daddy, I-”

“Not a word” Loki said. “I know exactly what you were doing”

He picked up his phone off the bed, opening it and clicking the button to see the recently viewed items. Peter had definitely taken leave of his senses, leaving everything out in the open like this. 

“I-I’m gonna go” Peter tried.

“No, I think not” Loki said. He held a hand up, and the door slammed shut. 

Peter swallowed hard. Loki hadn’t looked at him properly since he’d walked in, and Peter’s senses were screaming at him. He wished he’d just left everything alone.

“You came into my room without permission” Loki started, setting his phone down on his bedside table. “You go through my personal files, y-”

“Why have you got all that stuff? Is that from when you were in Scotland before? Were you gonna stay a lot longer?”

“Peter, do you really think that’s important?” 

“…Is that a yes?”

Loki looked at him. “You try to get into my tablet. You get into my phone, you look at my private notes and messages”

“Not all of them!”

“Found your tongue, I see” Loki said. “You went through my things, you came in here without permission, you’ve invaded my privacy and you’ve betrayed my trust in you”

“I-I didn’t mean to! I just heard you on the phone and I thought something might be wrong and I wanted to find out what”

“And you didn’t think to just ask me?”

Peter stopped, and he felt himself blush. 

“I’m really not happy with you, young man”

Peter looked down, shuffling on his feet. “…Am I in trouble?”

“YES, you’re in trouble!” Loki snapped, making the boy jump. “If you’d listened instead of interrupting, you’d know why. Although, judging by your face when I caught you red-handed, you _already_ know why. You know you’ve done wrong”

“Mm… I didn’t mean to”

“What did you think would be the outcome, if you came in here and started going through my things without permission, and got caught? Did you stop to consider that?”

“Well…”

Loki folded his arms over his chest. Peter took a step back, and dared look at his father, at the look in his eyes, and the slight tremble of his left arm. 

“I’m sorry”

Loki didn’t say anything. He sat down on the bed, resting his head in his hand.

“…Daddy?”

Loki stayed quiet, thinking. Was he right to be this angry? Was it really as bad as he though it was? Had any real harm actually been done? What should he do? Punish the boy in the way his first, second, and third instincts were telling him to? Let him go without consequence? Risk him doing it again, and maybe finding more? He’d found so much in eight minutes. How much could he find in an hour? He might even reach the right conclusion if he had long enough.

“Get my tea”

Peter did as he was told, surprised by the request, but still cautious. He watched Loki sip his drink and sit up a little straighter. It looked like he was calmer, like he was relenting. For a moment they looked at each other, and just when it looked as though Loki was about to say something, there was a knock, and the door opened.

“Hey, a- oh, you’re both here” Tony said. “What’s going on?”

Loki sighed. “I found him going through my phone and private things”

“What?!” Tony marched over, the look on his face bringing a new meaning to Hell Hath No Fury. “How DARE you?!”

“I-”

“No, don’t interrupt!” Tony snapped, making him face him properly. “You shouldn’t have been in here without permission anyway! How dare you betray our trust like this? Why I-”

Loki watched them, feeling absent. He watched the way Tony spoke to Peter. The way he snapped at him. And then the way he shouted at him. He looked at his hand on the boys wrist, keeping him there. He watched the way Peter tried to shut down the situation, the way he tried to explain but kept getting cut off. He saw the look in the boys eyes. 

“I’m sick to death of your behaviour! I never would have gotten away with acting like this, and neither are you”

Tony tugged the boy close and hit him hard. Peter’s squeak, the next smack, and the sound of the boy crying broke Loki out of his dazed state.

“Tony!”

“He’ll never learn if we don’t discipline him” Tony said through gritted teeth, bringing his hand down again. 

“I’m sorry!!” Peter cried.

“There” Tony said. “You’ve had an apology now”

“He’s already apologised!”

Tony didn’t seem to be listening. Loki stood still for a moment, trying to think about things rationally. But another horrible smack, followed by the sight of his son howling and begging his father not to hurt him anymore was more than enough to make up his mind.

“Tony, stop it!” Loki grabbed Tony’s wrist. “You’re being too hard on him! It’s not that big a deal, and certainly not enough for you to be hurting him like this! Stop it now!!”

“He can take a few taps, Lolly” Tony said, but he let go of the boy.

Loki quickly moved Peter away from Tony, shielding him as he hugged him. 

“Are you alright?! Be honest with me, honey”

Peter covered his mouth with his hand, keeping his eyes averted, sobbing. Loki hugged him tight, protectively, willing the boy to stop shaking. He glared at Tony over his shoulder.

“You’ve scared him, you bastard!” he all but shouted. “You can’t take out all your pent-up emotions on our little boy!”

“I’m not!” Tony protested. “I’m being a parent”

“You’re being a bully” Loki shot back. “Do you want him to go and live with Thor, is that it?”

“What are you going on about?”

“That’s what happened last time you didn’t think he was safe with you. If you don’t sort yourself out, he’ll have to go again”

“Lolly, darling, you’re tired. Let’s talk about this in the morning” Tony said awkwardly.

“No, let’s talk about it now” Loki said, sitting Peter down on the bed and turning to Tony properly. “I don’t care how much you want to deny it, we both know you’ve been horrible to Peter ever since you got those DNA test results”

“Are you surprised? It’s a lot to process!”

“I _know_ it’s a lot to process! But that’s not a reason nor an excuse for you treating him so badly. I can’t be here all the time, and-”

“Loki, I’m _not_ being horrible to him! He’s the one being a little nightmare!”

“He’s being fine!”

“He was going through your stuff!”

“And I was handling it! You didn’t need to barge in here and launch an attack, did you? You’ve hurt him multiple times since that appointment, and the scariest part is you seem to think it’s just discipline or something, or you’re just a very good actor. You can’t seem to see that there’s a difference between a firm smack and an absolute wallop like you’ve been dolling out”

“I haven’t been that harsh!” Tony insisted. “…Have I?”

“Who in their right mind would react to those results the way you have? Thank god our kid is the only one, if this is how you are”

“What do you mean by that?”

“You talked to that Asgard man?” Peter piped up nervously.

“Yes, I did, sweetheart, even though it put me at risk of bumping into all the other bastards up there, because you asked me to, and you needed to know. And so did I”

“…He’s really the only one?” Tony said, suddenly a lot calmer.

“Yes, and I’m bloody glad of it too, and not in the least because you’ve reacted so badly to this that I’m not sure I even trust you around him right now”

Tony didn’t say anything, but he looked shame-faced. Loki didn’t look any happier for it.

“You need to face up to this and start acting like a proper dad again. Your denial is doing no one any good, and your way of ‘processing’ your emotions is damaging us. But it’s starting to seem more and more unlikely that you’re ever going to accept this new reality, unless you’re forced to” he said. “And maybe doing that is a good idea”

Loki picked up his phone, checking the time. It was still fairly early. Good.

“What are you doing?” Tony said.

“Making you face up to this”

“You can’t do that!”

“Watch me”

Peter flinched at the struggle that followed. Part of him wanted to jump in and make it stop, but he felt like he’d already caused enough trouble for one day. Tony was no match for Loki anyway. Peter looked at them. Tony had ended up on his back, hands trapped by his sides, with Loki sat on top of him with one hand holding his phone, and the other over Tony’s mouth. Something about it seemed to be evidence of truce - or at least, something close to it.

“Hello, Marco, my love” Loki said. “Have you got a pen? Perfect. I’ve got a little something for our press release”

Tony tried to struggle and get Loki to stop, unsuccessfully. He looked over at Peter for help. Peter knew what that look meant, but there was no way he was going to jump to Tony’s aid, not after how hard he’d hit him. He flopped against Loki’s pillows and hid his face so Tony couldn’t throw any more signals at him.

“Word for word, darling, promise me that now. You can choose a little opening if need be, mind” Loki was saying. “Everything ready? Beautiful. So, this is what I was thinking” Loki cleared his throat. “Due to recent findings in our personal lives, my husband decided to carry out a paternity test on himself and our son, under the guidance of our General Practitioner. Having now had time to process the results, we are happy to announce to the general public the wonderful coincidence that our son, Peter, is also my husband Tony’s biological son. While shocked by the discovery, we still remain the same family of equal parents and child. We will not be available for interview and ask that our families privacy be respected during this time”

“Nice… Nice, beautiful” Peter heard Marco saying over the phone. “Great! Tony got anything to add?”

Loki paused, his hand still over Tony’s mouth. “Tony Stark is not available for comment”

*


	16. Together Going Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New fic title!
> 
> Also sorry this took so long to update! Busy times on the home front here. Hope you enjoy if you're still reading!

-

Loki released Tony and moved off him, sitting back on his heels. Tony slowly sat up, and shoved Loki hard in the chest, catching him off guard.

“...Ok, maybe I deserved that” Loki said. “But I stand by my decision”

Tony didn’t say anything, but the tears in his eyes said more than enough. He went and sat at the end of the bed, keeping his eyes down.

“...Tony?”

There was another sound, and Loki saw that Peter had started crying too. Loki carefully got to his feet.

“Hey” he said softly. “Don’t you start”

Peter couldn’t help it. He could never deal with seeing people he loved cry, especially his parents - even when he was cross with them. So, seeing Tony cry was bound to have a knock-on effect.

“Tony, come on. It’s not that big a deal. Is it?”

Tony didn’t look at him. Loki reached out to touch him, but stopped, looking at Peter. He looked between the two of them, not knowing who to go to, not quite knowing who needed him more. He couldn’t help being reminded of that Pingu gif Peter had gone through a stage of sending him regularly, where he couldn’t decide between the phone and the kettle, and just sat down and started crying. He would be lying if he said he didn’t want to do the same.

“This isn’t a crying matter” Loki said uncertainly. “Come on”

He swallowed hard and went to Peter, picking him up.

“Here, come and give your dad a cuddle” he said, and went to put him down on Tony’s lap.

“No!” Peter squeaked, struggling away, very nearly falling over when he landed on his feet. “Why would I want to hug him after what he did?! I don’t want anything to do with him!”

Peter was out of the room before Loki could even blink.

“Oh...”

Loki almost ran after him. But then he looked at Tony, saw how he’d started crying more, and he sat down heavily and wound his arms round his husband. He felt bad not for running after Peter, but he couldn’t really be in two places at once. Besides, legally, he’d made more promises to Tony when he married him. Thinking it didn’t help much, but he had to justify his decision somehow.

-

Loki looked at the boy curled up on the laundry room sofa.

“I must admit, this is the last place I expected to find you” he said, closing the door behind him. “I’d just given up searching. You weren’t in the poolside store so I thought you’d gone out”

“You didn’t tell dad, did you?”

“No, I thought I’d spare you that one” Loki said. “He’s taking a bit of time out. I was just going to swap the washing over”

“Do you need a hand?”

“You can double check the pockets on the dark’s for me, if you like”

Peter nodded, slowly getting up. He knelt on the floor, doing his task absentmindedly, watching Loki move a set from the washing machine to the tumble dryer. He watched him setting up the washing machine for the next load, scooping laundry powder and measuring out fabric conditioner.

“... There’s nothing in the pockets” 

“Good. Here, you can help me get it into the machine”

Peter held the basket while Loki put everything in the machine.

“Thank you. Stick the basket over there”

Peter did, and then he went back to the sofa and curled up again. Loki followed, turning to the kitchenette and turning the kettle on. He got a couple of mugs down from the cupboard and put a tea bag in each.

“I only cried because he did. I hope you know that” Peter said. 

“I know” Loki said. “You’ve never been good at keeping your eyes dry when ours aren’t”

“I don’t really care that everyone’s gonna know now. They never would’ve if you hadn’t called Marco. I don’t think dad would’ve ever told”

“He would have done eventually” Loki said. “But eventually wasn’t soon enough”

“If it were the other way round, what would you have done?”

“What do you mean?” Loki asked, pouring water into the mugs.

“I mean, if you were my real- um, my bio dad...”

“I see”

Peter swallowed, watching him for a moment before turning away. “You would have announced it straight away. Well. After you’d let it sink in”

“Maybe” Loki said, sitting down beside him and handing him a mug. “But perhaps not. I’m not too big a fan of the press, and we all know that”

“Mm, I guess so”

“Why here, chick?”

Peter shrugged. “Maybe I didn’t want to be found just yet”

“Do you want me to leave you alone?”

Peter shook his head slightly. “No; I’m quite glad you’re here”

Loki put an arm round the boys shoulders and kissed him on the cheek. 

“Sorry about what you had to see”

“I’ve seen worse” Peter said. “It was kinda good to see you properly standing up to him. He had it coming”

Loki laughed slightly. “Well, perhaps. Your father is nothing if not a challenge”

“I’m used to seeing you two wrestle anyway”

“Well, yes, but usually in fun”

“I didn’t think he’d cry”

“It was frustration more than anything else, I think” Loki said. “He’ll be fine. He’s getting it all out of his system”

“Mm” Peter looked down into his mug. “I don’t think your plan is gonna work. I don’t think I _want_ it to work”

“Don’t be silly, Peter” Loki sighed. “I know you’re upset with him, and that’s understandable, but I don’t for a second believe that you’re ready to just cut him off. You want to be back being his best little friend, I know that”

Peter had to admit Loki was right. “It just doesn’t feel like it’s gonna happen. I wish we could just get on _all_ the time. Or at least _most_ of the time. He’s been all weird for a while now. Hot and cold, y’know?”

“I know. I think he’s a bit poorly, but he’s seeing someone to try to smooth things out. None of this is going to be plain sailing, but it will get better”

“You always sound so sure when you say that”

“Well, I’m always right, aren’t I?”

Peter looked at him, the corner of his mouth twitching. “Yeah, always”

“Exactly” Loki said, squeezing his shoulder. “So don’t you go worrying your pretty little head about it”

-

It felt strange going back upstairs after being in the laundry room for so long. Peter didn’t want to leave, but Loki had insisted, so he had no choice.

Peter stayed under Loki’s arm as they sat in the living room, taking note of the weight of his arm and the feeling of his pulse. He thought about how he’d carried him upstairs so effortlessly. He was definitely the strongest person he knew. Well, perhaps Thor and Captain America were on the same level, but he saw Loki’s strength much more often - and without the muscles and obviousness of the other two. It was strange that it was such a fact of life that he often forgot Loki wasn’t human. He was just daddy Loki most of the time. The fact he came from another world entirely didn’t really seem to matter.

-

Tony did join them later on, hair still dripping from his shower. He didn’t look happy, but he wrapped the quilted blanket round Loki’s shoulders and pulled him close. He didn’t say anything, and neither did Loki, but they both seemed happy enough with their arrangement - although Loki kept glancing at Peter at first, making sure he was alright now he wasn’t under his arm anymore.

Soon enough, Loki started to drift, and Peter could tell there was no point opening his mouth. So, he stood up slowly and slipped out of the room, down the hall, and sat down at the piano. A bit of practice couldn’t hurt.

-

Peter took himself to bed later on. He checked the living room first. His parents were still together: Loki had long since fallen asleep, and it looked as though Tony was going that way too. He left them to it.

He knew there were some challenges to come, mainly what people at school would say now there was a press release, and the over-impending threat of paparazzo. But those were things he’d deal with in the moment. He sighed to himself as he climbed into bed. Maybe tomorrow would be a bit simpler.

-

Tuesday morning was met with distaste. Peter hadn’t slept especially well: he felt restless and worried, and to top it off, people kept waking him up with texts, sending multiple messages. He didn’t reply to any of them, but the constant beeping for the first couple of hours made him so angry, it was all he could do to not throw his phone across the room and smash a window into the bargain, just to let his frustrations out. Eventually he just turned off his phone, but even then, he couldn’t settle down, and being woken up for school on so little sleep didn’t bode well with him.

“Come on, chick. You’ll be late if you don’t get up now”

Peter didn’t had a choice. Besides, going to school sounded like a good idea. Sure, he’d have to deal with the aftermath of the press release, but he didn’t really want to stay in the house when his parents were potentially still going to be at odds with each other.

-

It was incredibly strange to be in the car with Tony on the way to St Hendrick’s. Peter had expected Loki or even Happy to take him after the events of last night, but Tony had appeared seemingly at the last minute, ready. He seemed different, somehow - and Peter wasn’t sure if that were reassuring or not.

“So, are you doing anything for that end of term show?” Tony asked a couple of minutes into the journey.

“Um...” Peter couldn’t quite bring himself to look at him. “I don’t think so...”

“No? You should. You know, get involved, make the most of the time you have left there. You might end up regretting it if you don’t”

Peter didn’t say anything. Tony seemed to be acting almost normal - which, given the circumstances, was certainly _not_ normal. And that was unsettling.

So he stayed quiet. Tony kept glancing at him. Peter looked out of the window and tried to ignore him, but it was difficult as he was still hyper-aware of every little move he made.

“Well, think about it” Tony said eventually. “Go out with a bang”

Peter still didn’t say anything. Luckily, the school was in sight now. The awkwardness would be over soon.

\- 

Tony ruffled Peter’s hair by way of a goodbye, but he didn’t linger, much to Peter’s relief and surprise. He wasn’t feeling 100%, and that journey hadn’t helped. Still, despite all the evidence to the contrary, he could be quite intimidating when he wanted to be - and he had a feeling he was going to have to exercise that today.

-

There were whispers, of course, and stares, and a few pointed fingers. Peter kept his earphones in, sound-tracking his journey to the form room, and not looking anyone in the face until he found Millie and Flo.

“I was right” 

Peter glared, a little bit angry, but not enough to make a big deal out of it. He sat down beside Flo, who offered him a sherbet lemon. Peter declined, but he was glad of the touch of normality.

“You haven’t been round for ages” Flo said. “Are you still going to visit me after... Well, you know”

Peter looked at her. He grabbed his bag, finding his whiteboard.

_You can’t get rid of me that easily_

Flo read the message, and smiled. “Good”

“What about me?” Millie said. “We’ll still be friends, won’t we?”

Peter nodded.

“What about Macy?”

Peter wrinkled his nose. He hadn’t exactly made up with Macy yet, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to. It was a shame, he thought, that Malaki wasn’t interested in Macy - they’d make the perfect ill-adjusted couple. 

Speaking of Malaki...

Peter looked round, but he couldn’t see him. Part of him wanted to, even though Malaki had guessed right about the DNA results. At least Malaki respected him, even if he was a bit full-on and a bit of a bad influence. Even Peter had to admit that. 

As if on cue, there was a series of loud thumps, followed by a crash as the form room door burst open, denting the wall as the handle smacked into the plaster, and there was Malaki, looking like he’d been running from the police, his hair newly purple - incredible, considering what the boarding master had done last time he’d gone purple. Malaki spotted Peter, and straightened up, hoicking his bag up onto his shoulder.

Flo shifted, and Peter heard her noise of disapproval. 

“In a rush, are we, Malaki?” she said.

“Oh, always” Malaki said, pushing his hair out of his face and plonking himself down on the desk. “Hey, Curly”

Peter raised an eyebrow, but he couldn’t help the smile tugging at his lips.

“Good to see you, too” he said. “Have you got a few minutes?”

Peter checked the clock. They had a few minutes before the bell, but Flo grabbed his wrist when he went to stand up.

“You’re going to get into trouble” she said. 

Peter looked between the two of them, trying to weight it up, when there was another bang and crash, and Nigel made his own dramatic entrance, looking worse for wear. He paused, hands on the sides of the doorway. 

“OWENS!”

Suddenly Malaki’s dishevelled look made sense. It was quite amusing, in a way, how Malaki avoided Nigel with such ease, laughing and dodging whenever Nigel made a grab at him. He jumped up onto the nearest desk, jumping between them, ignoring people’s protests.

“I’ll kill you, Owens!”

Well, Malaki might be nimble, but even he couldn’t avoid the swinging of a full school satchel against his legs. There was a collective gasp and hiss as Malaki fell off a desk and onto the floor with a stomach-turning thump. Nigel took the chance to get the upper hand and lunged. It seemed like an unfair advantage, so Peter pulled away from Flo and decided to stick his oar in.

Nigel wasn’t expecting to suddenly have an arm round his neck, and it made him jump. It was the work of a moment to throw Nigel aside and crawl to Malaki’s aid.

“Hey, beautiful” Malaki mumbled, sitting up and sucking his breath.

“Are you alright?” People were asking. “Are you hurt??”

“I’m fine, I’m fine” Malaki said, but the puddle of blood on the carpet said differently. 

“Nigel, you idiot!” It was Millie, fuming, smacking him one with her Hello Kitty notebook. “He could have cracked his head open! Hey, Peter, move”

Peter did as he was told, letting Millie take charge of the situation. Everyone soon had a full view of the damage to the back of Malaki’s head, and the blood made the whole situation so much darker.

“Oh my god! Nigel, look what you’ve done!”

Millie wouldn’t let anyone else intervene. She pulled her jumper off, pressed it to the back of Malaki’s head, and did her best to get him off the floor safely.

There was a small silence after Millie had left with Malaki to go down to the nurse. Peter looked at Nigel, who had turned very pale, and whose eyes widened as he made eye contact with Peter.

“Hey, it was an accident”

Peter didn’t believe him. He pounced, and was shocked at the way Nigel grabbed him.

“Come with me”

“Peter, don’t!” Flo tried, but was quickly shut down. 

She might have a fierce streak, but she didn’t fancy her chances against Nigel.

-

There was a door on the wall opposite the form room, leading to a secluded outdoor space. Nigel didn’t let go of Peter’s arm until they were out there and the door had closed behind them. 

“What are you playing at?!” Peter snapped, shoving him. “You’re lucky you’ve got a rich dad, you know”

“Not as rich as yours”

“That’s not the point!” 

Peter went for him again, and within seconds, they were flat on the concrete, and somehow Nigel had ended up on top. Peter stopped, breathing heavily, and Nigel stooped and kissed him. So Peter smacked him one.

“What are you doing?! This isn’t some film where you can get rid of all the tension by hate-kissing!”

“I can try”

“You wouldn’t”

“Wouldn’t I, Peter Stark? Watch this”

He kissed him again, ignore Peter’s protests.

“You like it really” he said, kissing his jaw and neck.

“No, I don’t! I said stop it! Nigel, get off me!”

It took a little while for him to gather himself enough to fight back, and when he did, it was with full force. It was restrained only by the tight, restricted uniform he was wearing, but even then, Spiderman was no match for a misguided little rich kid. 

Only it didn’t work in his favour. Sure, he was stronger, and more skilled, but Nigel was heavy, and the ground was slippery and uneven - so it came as no surprise when they both went tumbling with a heavy _thunk_.

“AH! Ow!”

“Peter? Hey, are you alright?”

“What do you think?!” Peter growled, grabbing his bleeding forehead. “You could’ve cracked my head open as well as Malaki’s!”

“Good payback for a broken heart?”

Peter knocked him over and hauled himself to his feet. “You’re such a prick, Nigel”

“Does that mean you’re not going to visit after you leave St Hendrick’s?”

Peter looked at him, shaking his head in disbelief. “Unbelievable”

He went back inside, and Nigel scurried after him. “Hey! Come on, don’t be like that! You’ve been talking to me alright! It’s been nice”

Peter glared at him, feeling a little giddy after hitting his head so hard on the fire door handle. 

“...I’ll take you to the nurse”

-

The look on the nurse’s face when Peter and Nigel turned up said it all. 

“Two in one day! And you haven’t even had your first lesson yet!” she exclaimed, pushing Peter down onto the bed. “Whatever will the headmaster say?”

Peter looked at Malaki, who was lying on the next bed, looking pretty unwell, Millie at his side. But one look was enough to tell him that he hadn’t spilt the beans about Nigel. It looked like it might be down to him. Again. And he supposed, after everything Nigel had let him get away with, maybe he owed him the same courtesy. 

-

Peter got off a lot lighter than Malaki. His bump to the head had felt a lot worse than it was, and a quick clean and dressing, and a glass of water was all it took to fix him up. As for Malaki... Well, even without seeing how it happened, there were enough bloody medical consumables for anyone to see the extent of it, and not long after Peter got there, he was sick. And then he was sick again, and his consciousness started drifting. It was bad, and Peter had way too much experience with it. 

The headmaster and boarding master were summoned, and before long, Malaki was packed up to go to hospital, and the paramedics asked the question all four children had been dreading: “What happened?”

Everyone looked at Peter. He started crying, just a bit.

“...We...” he looked at Nigel. “We were just messing about...”

Mr Pipe-Fowler shook his head. “You’ve been very silly, all of you”

“This one’s always silly” Mr Hardwood, the boarding master, sighed. “He needs putting back on baby reins”

-

Mr Pipe-Fowler escorted Millie, Nigel, and Peter to their first lesson, made their excuses, and left. Once they were settled in groups, Nigel leant across the table.

“Why did you let me get away with it?”

Peter didn’t want to answer. Flo pushed his whiteboard at him.

“I want to know, too”

Peter picked up his whiteboard pen.

_I owed you one_

Nigel nodded slowly. “Well. Thank you. My father would have killed me”

“You deserve everything you get” Millie said.

“Everyone makes mistakes” Flo said. “You’ve let Peter get away with things. Not as bad as that, but, well, I suppose you’ve levelled the playing field now”

“Table three!” Mr Jones barked. “Stop gassing and get on with your work!”

“Sorry, Mr Jones!”

Peter looked down at his workbook. Luckily the rest of the morning was independent study. Maybe he’d see if he was allowed a practice room. He couldn’t get Malaki of his mind, but maybe a bit of playing would help.

-

Mr James was happy to make an exception and allow Peter full reign of a practice room.

“Stay as long as you like” he said. “I’ve got a class but I’ll check on you in a bit if you’re still here”

Peter just nodded. He waited till he was alone, and then sat down at the piano. He leant his elbow on the keys, listening to the heavy notes reverberate as he did so. He rested his head on his hand and tapped a few keys. He couldn’t get the events of the morning off his mind. He still wasn’t entirely sure how it had all happened, but he wished it hadn’t. He couldn’t seem to settle his mind now. He didn’t even feel like playing. Really, he just wanted to go home and go to sleep. He wished it was a viable option. It almost made him envy the boarders: some of them had the option to go back to the boarding houses for their independent study periods. That would be a godsend.

-

The rest of the day seemed to drag painfully slowly. Peter was exhausted by the time the final bell rang. He dragged himself outside, feeling even more tired and fed up when he saw Tony’s car waiting for him. 

“Hey, kiddo” Tony said as he climbed into the car. “Hey! What happened to your head?!”

“Can you take me to the hospital?”

“What? Why, what is it?! Does your head hurt? Do you feel sick, dizzy?”

“It’s not for me! I need to see Malaki!”

Tony blinked at him. “Malaki? Hey, Peter, what happened?”

Tony rested his hand on the back of Peter’s neck, looking at him worriedly. Peter looked at him for a moment, his heart thudding, and suddenly everything came flooding out and he gabbled everything that had happened.

There was a small silence. Tony withdrew his hand.

“It’s probably best we get you home: sounds like you’ve had a rough day”

“I need to see Malaki! Please, just for a bit. It’s not like we’ve got anything much to get back for”

“I’m not so sure it’s a good idea. What if he’s not allowed visitors?”

“He is; he texted and told me. Dad, _please_! I really need to see him. Please...”

Tony sighed. “Alright, alright. I’ll take you, but if they say you can’t see him, we’re not arguing, ok?”

What choice did he have? After all, at least this distracted from the other obvious trauma. And Peter was speaking to him again, at least. That had to count for something.

*


	17. I Feel Like A Bullet

-

Something about the hospital turned Peter’s stomach. He stayed close to Tony, walking determinedly, but froze when they reached the ward.

“Maybe this isn’t a good idea” Tony said. “You’re not up to this”

“That isn’t for you to decide”

“Come on, sweetheart. Let’s go home, and-”

“No! I need to see him”

“You don’t look so sure”

Peter looked at him. “He wants me to see him too”

Tony scoffed. “Well, I- Oh, don’t give me that look! Alright, alright, let’s see if they’ll let you see him”

-

Mr Hardwood, the boarding master, didn’t look too happy to see Peter.

“What are you doing here? Looks like you’ve been in the wars yourself” he said, pushing Peter’s fringe back and inspecting his bandages.

Peter pushed his hand away and glared at him.

“Peter!”

“If looks could kill! You certainly take after your father”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Tony demanded.

Mr Hardwood looked at him. “Your husband gives me the same look every time he sees me”

Tony sighed. “Give the kid a break; he just wants to see his mate”

“You’d do well to keep him away from Owen’s. He’s the biggest tearaway I’ve ever had in my house, and I’ve been in the job more than thirty years. I’m just surprised he didn’t end up here sooner”

Tony looked at the boys, at the way they held hands and rested their heads together. Malaki looked awful, hooked up to monitors, head heavily bandaged, face pale as snow. He couldn’t help being glad it hadn’t been Peter.

“I expected his parents” Tony said simply.

“They’re on route” Mr Hardwood said. “They’ve had a hard time getting away from work. Meetings a town or two over, I think”

Tony looked at Malaki. He didn’t like the kid at all, but he did feel a bit sorry for him. If it had been Peter, he’d have stormed out of even the most important meetings to be with him. He was surprised Malaki’s hadn’t done the same.

“Thanks for coming, curly” Malaki croaked. “I could do with a friendly face. I hate hospitals. I’ve never been, like, admitted to one before. Not like you”

Peter rested his nose against Malaki’s and closed his eyes for a moment.

“…I said his mum was a swinger” Malaki said. “There’s a club at the back of one of the houses in his street. It could be true. I only said it because he was being his usual self, goading me and stuff. I guess it worked”

Peter opened his mouth and tried to speak. He tried to tell Malaki they should have turned Nigel in. He tried to tell him to rest, he tried to tell him how much he meant to him. But try as he might, he couldn’t so much as squeak.

Malaki rested a shaking hand on Peter’s cheek.

“See?” he said. “You love me really”

Peter raised his hand to his mouth, his heart thudding in his chest.

“I love you too, you know, Peter Stark” he struggled onto his side. “Not to ruin the moment, but I think I’m gonna be sick”

Peter grabbed a cardboard bowl from beside the bed for him. 

Tony leant closer to Mr Hardwood.

“How bad is it, really?”

“They’re worried” Mr Hardwood said. “They had to sedate him to fix his head, and he’s got some bad signs. Bruising behind the ears and things like that. Bad signs, apparently. He keeps being sick and he had a fit in the ambulance. They’re keeping an eye on it”

“Poor kid. He’ll be alright though, won’t he?”

Mr Hardwood held up a hand, questioning. “Suppose we’ll find out”

They were distracted by footsteps, and a frantic, but well-dressed and well-presented couple rushed over.

“Malaki!”

Peter scurried aside as the pair ran over, the woman gathering Malaki up in her arms. Peter watched them, the way she held him and the way he buried himself in her touch. He couldn’t help being jealous when he saw people with loving mothers. It always reminded him of May.

“You’ll be the death of us, young Malley” the man said, close at his wife’s side.

“Peter, we should go” Tony said.

The man looked up. “Peter? _You’re_ the Peter he’s always talking about?”

“Don’t get all up on him, dad” Malaki mumbled, pulling away from his mother and flopping back on the bed. “He’s jus’ been keeping me company”

“You didn’t have anything to do with this, did you?”

“Dad! Leave him alone” Malaki said, resting a hand on his forehead.

“Sorry, sorry. God, Malley, we’ve been going mad worrying about you! It’s one thing after another with you! First-”

Peter didn’t know where to look. He’d heard Malaki being told off before, but not in these circumstances, and not by his parents. 

Mr Owens stopped, sighed. “You’d better be alright”

Tony swallowed. “You should say goodbye, Peter”

“Aw, don’t go” Malaki said. 

Peter felt sick. Something was so wrong here. He didn’t really want to be near Mr Hardwood, or Malaki’s parents, or his own parent. Maybe it was them making him feel so nervous. Still, maybe Tony was right.

He gave Malaki a little hug, feeling awkward with everyone watching - and then froze. He pulled back slightly, looking into Malaki’s eyes. He felt Malaki’s grip loosen, and he turned and slammed his palm into the emergency button above the bed.

“Peter! What are you doing?!”

It all seemed to happen at once after that.

“Malaki?!”

“Malaki! Oh god, he’s fitting!”

“Make some space, please!”

“Peter, come on!”

Tony grabbed Peter, forcing him out of the room and off the ward.

-

Everything seemed much too quiet. Peter could hardly walk, and it felt as though he would have fallen if Tony didn’t have his arm round him. He felt like he was going to be sick.

They were outside before he knew it. Tony stopped, still holding onto him.

“How did you know?”

Peter pulled away from him and doubled up.

“Oh god. Alright kid, I’ve got you” Tony sighed, awkwardly patting his back.

Peter finished and pushed him away.

“Whoa! Hey, come on”

Peter turned away from him, wiping his mouth.

“Hey, not on your sleeve! Oi, where do you think you’re going? Car’s this way”

-

Loki didn’t look happy when he saw Tony.

“You know, I thought, over the last however-many years of marriage, relationships, and negotiation, that we had an agreement of letting each other know if we’re going to be more than twenty minutes late”

“Sorry, Loll; I got caught up”

Loki looked at Peter. “Give me your blazer”

Peter slipped it off and handed it over.

“Now go and get changed”

Peter didn’t need convincing. Loki looked back at Tony.

“I want the full story when I’m back”

“Back from where?! Loki, don’t walk away from me! From _where_?!”

“The laundry room!”

-

Tony told Loki everything, of course.

“He lied, Lokes. Shouldn’t we do something about that? I mean, he’s given a free pass to Nigel, who put someone in _hospital_! That’s too big a lie”

“It’s schoolyard justice, chick” Loki sighed. “He was returning a favour”

“Yeah, but he’s never done anything _that_ bad! At least, I don’t think he has”

“I’m sure he hasn’t, but this isn’t any of our business”

“He’s our kid; of course it’s our business!”

Loki sighed. “What exactly do you want me to do?”

“ _I_ don’t know! Give me some advice, maybe?”

“I have: I’ve told you to leave it alone”

“Yeah, but-”

“But _what_ , Anthony?! If you want to do something different, that’s your prerogative, but I’ll have no part in it. Don’t you think he’s been through enough today?”

“His head isn’t that bad”

“I’m not talking about his head!” Loki snapped, starting to get angry. “I’m talking about seeing his friend seriously hurt, and fitting, in hospital”

“He saw you in worse states”

Loki stopped. He sat down opposite Tony.

“Let’s talk about that, shall we?”

Tony looked away. “I don’t want to”

“Why bring it up, then?”

“I was just making a point”

“Well, maybe we _should_ talk about it. We never talk about it. We both went through it, albeit from different angles, but you never face up to it”

“We were newlyweds, Loki! Our first year of marriage is marred by what happened to you”

“It was a few months; not the whole year”

“You know what I mean” Tony mumbled.

“Do I? Tell me, Anthony. Talk about what happened”

“I don’t want to!” he stood up, turning his back on Loki.

“Well, I do!” Loki said, grabbing his shoulder and turning him back to face him. “I want to talk about it, and I _need_ to”

“You’ve talked about it with Pepper, and with May when she was still alive, and Mary and Jo Jo, and a couple of professionals. You don’t need to talk about it again”

“Yes, I do! None of them were there, not like you. None of them know me as well, or know as much about it, as you. You went through the whole thing by my side, but after I recovered you acted like it never happened. I need to work through this, Tony, and I need to do it with my husband”

Tony was quiet for a moment. “It hurt too much. I don’t want to relive it. It was ages ago now. Why can’t we pretend it never happened?”

“For the same reason you can’t buy vanilla bath products or Herbal Essences anymore. There’s always going to be remnants of it”

“There doesn’t have to be”

“Tony, just let me talk about it with you!”

“I don’t want to. I don’t see why we have to reflect about it as if it’s some fond memory. Isn’t it easier to forget?”

“Evidently not! But maybe it would be easier if we actually talked about it properly for once, instead of just mentioning it through obscure references. I’m reminded of it every time I bump into nurse Tyler, every time I see someone from that ward. And I’m reminded every time the hospital garden and colouring books are mentioned”

Tony swallowed hard. “You want to talk about difficult things? Fine. Why don’t you talk about those property listing the kid found? I’ve looked at them”

“You went through my things? Tony!”

“I’ve seen the dates on them. They aren’t from your sabbatical, so tell me what’s going on”

“Maybe I just like houses. We’re not talking about some printouts; we’re talking about the time I spent two months in hospital”

“Loki, how many times?”

“And how many times do _I_ have to try to get you to talk about what happened? Anthony, the sooner you face up to it, the better! I spent weeks in hospital, in a c-”

“Dad?”

Loki spun round. “… I didn’t hear you come in”

“You weren’t listening”

“No, I suppose not…”

Tony looked at the clock. “We should get the kid fed”

“I’m not hungry” Peter said.

“You’ll eat whether you like it or not, young man”

“I SAID, I’m not hungry! I’ll get something later if I want it”

“That’s not the deal, kid”

“Why does there have to be a deal?!”

“Oh Tony, give it a rest” Loki sighed, sitting down at the breakfast bar. “If he’s not hungry, he’s not hungry”

“He needs to eat. You can have a good meal or a good spanking, that’s your choice”

“Tony!”

“What? I’m parenting”

“That’s hardly parenting”

“Look, if he was an adult, he’d be getting done for lying to the police, so-”

“What are you talking about?” Peter interrupted.

“You, covering for Nigel! You shouldn’t lie about things as serious as that”

“I was returning a favour. We owed each other, and now he owes me and I owe him nothing. I levelled the playing field”

“It’s not levelling the playing field if he still owes you” Tony said. “Stop being so silly. You need to eat, and if you’re not going to eat-”

“You can’t spank him for not being hungry” 

“Oh, really? Actually, it was going to be for being defiant. What can I spank him for, then?”

“You know, Anthony, until you blew your top the other day, I thought that was something we’d phased out. But if that’s something you want to discuss, we’ll have to wait until the baby is out of the way. It’s not exactly a conversation he needs to be involved in, is it?”

“What about the one about the houses?” Peter said.

“Yes, Loki, what about the one about the houses?” Tony said, crossing his arms over his chest.

Loki looked between the two of them. “You’re being ridiculous”

“Tell us then, Loki Stark. I don’t believe for a second that they’re just for you to look at because you like houses”

“Ok, firstly, what makes you think this is any of your business? And secondly-”

“We’re married, Loki! Of course it’s my business”

“Oh, we’re married, are we? What’s that, again? People who share everything? Hm, seems we’ve missed that, given your ongoing insistence that we don’t need to talk about the time I was in a-”

“Loki, that’s history”

“NOT TO ME!” Loki shouted, slamming his fist down on the breakfast bar, making Peter jump. “You want to know what those houses are for? The children’s home in Scotland want me to go back, I considered it because I did well when I was there and it would be good to work somewhere without those constant reminders of my time on the coma ward, so I started looking at places to live if I accepted. Is that a good enough answer for you, Anthony Edward Stark?!”

There was a heavy silence, in which no one knew quite what to do.

Eventually Tony cleared his throat.

“…I forgot to get bread and milk”

-

Peter wasn’t sure why he’d ended up at Tony’s side in the car. 

“We could have just gone to the corner shop” he said timidly.

“I want something a bit more artisan”

Peter nodded. Tony was rubbish at hiding his feelings.

-

Going to his room seemed like Peter’s only option when they got home. He didn’t want to be part of any arguments. Although, as it happened, he didn’t hear any. He sat on his bed and thought about Malaki. He hoped he was alright.

-

Loki sat down beside Peter on the edge of the bed.

“Did you know that the calories in a hot chocolate make it equivalent to a small meal?”

Peter smiled slightly and took the mug from him. “The first tolerant conversation we ever had”

“Tolerant? I remember being highly annoyed at your presumptuousness”

“Well, maybe…”

They sat in silence for a minute.

“Malaki’s not going to die, is he?”

“He’s young and strong” Loki said. “He’s got a good chance of recovery”

“You know what you said in the kitchen?”

“Yes?”

“Was it true?”

“Mostly”

Peter looked at him. It only took him a second to work out which part wasn’t true.

“You’re not leaving him, are you?”

“No. That was never part of the thinking. Even if he is being a-… Well, even if he is being incredibly difficult right now”

“Do you think you’ll actually go back?”

“I doubt it. I can’t leave you”

“What about him?”

“He wouldn’t let me take you with me”

Peter glanced at his mug. “I’m not so sure. He’s been a bit better today, but he’s essentially acted like he hates me since we got the test results”

Loki shook his head. “He wouldn’t let you go”

“Would you leave if he let me come too?”

“I don’t know”

“Because you don’t want to leave him?”

“He’d cope. We’ve done distance before”

“Living in your brothers flat doesn’t really count”

“It always felt like much farther away”

“…You still love him, right?”

Loki nodded. “With all my being. But that doesn’t mean he’s my first priority”

“Well, then what is?”

“You are”

“Really?”

“Well, most of the time. Closely followed by myself. It’s not selfish to look after yourself, you know”

“I know…”

“You should go to sleep when you’ve finished that” Loki said. “You’ve got school in the morning”

“You know, this whole life thing doesn’t seem to be getting any easier”

Loki laughed slightly. “It took me more than a thousand years to get to where I am now”

“I’m not gonna live that long”

“Well, maybe not. But don’t expect a quick fix. You know better than most how life fluctuates”

“Well, I wish it wouldn’t”

“You can’t control that, chick” he said, standing up. “I’ll check on you in a bit. Goodnight, chick”

“Yeah, goodnight, dad” Peter sighed, thinking about everything that had happened that day. “…See you in the morning”

Loki nodded and made for the door.

“Wait, dad?”

Loki paused and turned his head to him.

“What’s that word for when a bullet hits something and then another and another?”

Loki thought for a moment.

“Ricochet” 

*


	18. So Much To Prove

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments/questions encouraged

-

Peter stirred uncomfortably, whimpering as he woke up. It was dark - too dark. He’d fallen asleep so quickly that he hadn’t even turned the night light on. He whimpered again, tears pricking his eyes, and became aware of someone’s arms round him.

“Shh, it’s ok, I’ve got you”

Peter relaxed, somewhere between asleep and awake, pressing a hand against whoever was holding him, reassuring himself. He shifted slightly and slowly drifted back to sleep.

-

“Did I have a nightmare last night?” Peter asked Loki at breakfast.

“Surely you should know the answer to that one?” Loki said, putting his mug down.

“Well, I don’t always remember, especially when someone’s with me like you were”

Loki paused, quirking an eyebrow. “I didn’t go to you in the night, chick”

“Oh” Peter sat back, confused. “But then who..? Um…”

“Finish your toast. You don’t want to be late for school”

“I don’t know if I’m up to it”

“You are” he nodded at the door. “Blazer’s there when you need it”

-

Peter swallowed hard, tearing his eyes away from the car window.

“Did you and daddy talk last night?” 

“That’s none of your business” Tony said abruptly. “Don’t be so nosey”

‘A definite yes’, Peter thought. He looked at Tony, trying to figure him out. He was rubbish at hiding things, but he also neglected to talk about things that were most important, so sometimes the full effect got lost. 

“What are you staring at? You’re putting me off”

Peter shrugged and looked away. They were quiet until Tony parked up in front of the school.

“Try to have a normal day today, kid” Tony said. 

“What happened yesterday wasn’t my fault”

“I never said it was. Just don’t have a repeat, alright?”

Peter pouted at him. 

“Just be good, kid. Now go: you’re gonna be late”

“You’ve changed your tune”

Tony smacked his thigh, hard.

“OW! Dad!”

“Don’t be so cheeky. Now sling your hook”

Peter didn’t need to be asked twice. He grabbed his bag and stepped out of the car, all but slamming the door behind him. He didn’t have high hopes for the day ahead.

-

Malaki was on everyone’s minds and lips. There were a lot of rumours, and some of them were pretty worrying. Unfortunately, some of them were true, but, having not heard anything more from Malaki since the day before, Peter wasn’t sure about all of them. He didn’t really want to think about it.

Not that he had much choice in the matter. 

There were too many reminders. Almost everyone in the form had seen what had happened, and there were a lot of pale faces in the discussions. Peter turned round when the bell rang, looking at the conspicuously clean patch on the carpet, at Malaki’s empty seat - and Nigel’s too.

Flo rested a hand on Peter’s to get his attention.

“I think he’s gone and told the truth” she whispered. “I’m not entirely sure, though”

The door opened, making her jump, but it was just Ms Hathersage.

“Settle down, now!” she barked. “Well, well, well! It’s nice to see you all in one piece! Just about. How’s your head, Stark?”

Peter didn’t respond. He’d almost forgotten about his own injury. He probably would have done altogether if Loki hadn’t changed the dressing when he’d woken up. It seemed so insignificant, especially with Malaki in hospital.

-

Mr James’ practice room seemed like a refuge from the heavy stresses and talks of the morning.

“How’s your head?”

Peter shrugged.

“Yeah, I thought as much. Any news on your friend?”

Peter threw his bag down and plonked himself down at the piano, ignoring him. Mr James understood.

“Well, I’ve got some marking to do, so I’m taking this corner” he said, slinging his briefcase onto the little table. “It’s easier to focus in here. Less people knocking on the door, you see”

Peter nodded slightly, not really listening. He flexed his hands and tapped a few keys, not sure what to play. His head was all over the place: Malaki, Loki’s house search, leaving school, being Tony Stark’s biological son… He hadn’t even got his head around the first problem, let alone those that had followed. He didn’t have a clue what he was supposed to do about any of them. He didn’t really know how he felt about any of them either.

Well, he was worried about Malaki. He didn’t know what was going to happen to him. What if it was serious and he had long-lasting problems? He didn’t even know how he was now. He wasn’t sure it was his place to text and try to find out. Malaki’s phone could be dead, for a start, or he might be indisposed. There was nothing he could do, anyway.

Leaving school was just a fact of life now. He hadn’t had much time to, but if he really thought about it, he wasn’t really sure he wanted to leave anymore. He didn’t have any control over that either.

Loki’s house search was more confusing. Peter still wasn’t sure why Loki had lied and said he’d been asked to go back. Sure, they kept in touch, but why not tell Tony the truth? As much as he’d enjoyed his sabbatical, Peter wasn’t convinced he’d actually leave. But, Loki was nothing if not unpredictable. Besides, he’d heard his outburst about his time in hospital. Maybe the stress of that memory and not being able to talk about it was getting too much for him. If it was, maybe Scotland really did beckon. 

Some, everything was piling up, but those bloody DNA test results still felt like the biggest problem. Peter hadn’t had the television or radio on, or even checked his phone properly since the press release, but he could imagine all too well what was going off. He was still surprised no one had cornered him at the hospital about it.   
It wasn’t the press that bothered him, though. Not really. What got to him, was the massive uncertainty that came with learning that the past you thought you knew was nothing but a fabrication. Plus, there was the whole issue of Tony seeming furious at the results one minute, and acting like they’d never had them the next. AND, on top of _that_ , Tony and Loki were at odds, and Tony seemed to have started smacking again. Peter hoped what happened just before Loki rang Marco was an isolated incident, but he couldn’t be sure. His leg had throbbed for a good ten minutes after he’d been struck in the car that morning. He didn’t like the feeling that Tony might be taking his frustrations out on him. Sure, Loki had mentioned he was seeing someone to work through his problems, but he couldn’t be sure. Tony wasn’t great at the whole opening up thing.

-

“That was energetic”

Peter looked round at Mr James.

“Energetic. But sad” Mr James said. “It was good. You’ve always been good at the classics”

Peter turned back to the piano. He’d just played from the list on the wall, half-hearted but heavy-handed. Still, even then, he felt better for it.

“Did you do any playing last night?”

Peter shook his head.

“Can’t say I’m surprised. Tired?”

Peter shrugged.

“You’re quiet today” Mr James came over and stood beside him. “What’s burning in there today? We can have a little chat, if you like?”

Peter froze, reassured himself that it was only his parents who always used ‘chat’ to mean he was in trouble, and breathed out. He shook his head slightly.

“Well, I’m in the corner if you change your mind” Mr James said, squeezing his shoulder and returning to his table.

Peter was quiet a moment longer, before resting his hands on the keys and starting to play. Calm and light at first, and then a few heavy notes mixed in. He got into the rhythm, and soon started humming along under his breath. He felt safe in the funny little room, piano at his mercy, Mr James quiet in the corner.

He grew immersed in the music, his humming become more pronounced, a type of mumble of almost-words. And…

“-Caesar’s had your troubles, widows had to cry. While mercenaries in cloisters si–ng; And the king must diiiiieee”

God, it felt so good to sing without worrying what people might think.

“Some men are better slaying sailors. Take my word and go.. But tell the ostler that his name was; the v _e_ ry first they ch _o_ se”

Somehow, he was thinking of other things as he played. Mainly about school, and about what people might think if they overheard this. Oddly… well, he didn’t care. ‘Let them hear’ he thought, hammering out the final notes. He paused a moment, catching his breath, still on the same train of thought.

;Well’ he thought. ‘If anyone’s listening, I’ll give them something to listen to’

“You can never know what it’s like.. Your blood, like winter, freezes just like ice..  
And there’s a cold and lonely light that shines from you.. You will wind up like the wreck you hide, behind that mask you use”

He played it heavy, a little slower, much more _Rocketman_ than _Too Low For Zero_. Mr James looked up from his papers, watching closely. 

“And did you think this fool could never win? Well look at me, I’m-a coming back again.. Got a taste of love, in a simple way, and if you need to know while I’m still _standin_ ’ you just fade a-way..”

Mr James stood up, carefully, slowly, not wanting to interrupt. Not yet.

“Don’t you know? I’m still standing better than I ever did! Lookin’ like a true sur _vivor_ \- feelin’ like a little kid. I’m still standin’ after all this time.. Picking up the pieces of my life, without you on my mind..”

Mr James put a hand on Peter’s shoulder, and he stopped abruptly. He swallowed, hands still on the keys, and slowly looked up at him, biting the inside of his lip.

“How do you feel about breaking the rules?”

-

Breaking the rules though it was, it felt right with it being a teachers idea. However, that didn’t help at the end of the day. At first, he still felt brilliant - incredible, energised, on cloud nine - but then the butterflies were replaced with moths, fluttering replaced with thudding, and he felt sick with nerves.

It wasn’t like Tony was going to find out, and, honestly, it wasn’t as though he’d really done anything _wrong -_ but his father was so unpredictable right now that anything seemed to be a possibility.

“Not a bad lot of work for a Wednesday afternoon” Mr James said. “See you tomorrow, Master Parker-Stark”

“Thanks, s-sir”

“No problem. Well, you’d better be going. Bye now!”

Peter went out to the carpark, praying that it would be Loki, or even Happy, waiting for him.

No such luck.

“You took your time” Tony grumbled as Peter climbed into the car.

“Mr James’ lesson ran over” Peter said, not untruthfully.

“Mm” Tony said, obviously not listening. “Your father wants to have a word when we get back”

“Oh… About Scotland?”

“What? No, don’t be ridiculous!”

“I’m not!” Peter scowled. “Well, what _is_ it about, then?”

“You and me. And… _this_ ” he gestured between the two of them. “I think”

“What could he know that we don’t? We’ve got the results, and you don’t remember my mother”

“We’ll find out soon enough, won’t we?”

There was a short silence. 

“…Dad?

Tony sighed irritably. “What?”

“Do you regret getting us tested?”

“Just put your headphones in, kid”

“But-”

“But nothing! Put your bloody headphones in or I’ll smack you so hard you won’t be able to sit down for a week, understand?!”

He could have been bluffing - but Peter didn’t want to take that risk.

-

Loki sat Tony and Peter down at the kitchen table, much to Tony’s annoyance.

“Is this going to take long?”

“It takes as long as it takes!” Loki snapped.

There was a pause. Peter looked down at his hands. Loki sighed, and placed a brown A4 envelope down on the table.

“I don’t want you to get angry at me because of this. I didn’t really register at the time, and I’d honestly forgotten until I saw it today”

“What is it?” Tony asked.

Loki pushed the envelope towards Peter. “I think you should do this”

Peter hesitated. He didn’t like the feeling of them watching him, but he took the envelope nonetheless. It was thin, obviously not much to it. He slipped the piece of paper out of the envelope, turning it over and looking at it, reading it over. It all _seemed_ pretty normal - aside from one thing.

“The birth certificate? I forgot you’d requested that. What’s the big deal?”

“Hand it to your father, Peter”

“Loki, I know what a birth certificate looks like. I don’t think-”

“Just read it, Tony”

Tony humoured him, taking the certificate from Peter. He glanced it over, and then stopped. His expression changed and there was silence as he set it down in the middle of the table. He pinched the bridge of his nose, looking pained.

Peter swallowed hard, not that it helped. “What does it mean?”

Loki brought the certificate close, looking at the blank space where a father’s name should be.

“It means your mother knew”

*


End file.
